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May
Making New Friends
Seniors, when moving around to new residences, or
when a partner passes, sometimes they have to find
new friends. When in school it was easier. There
they were in the same classroom or sports team. At
work they were in the next cubicle or assembly line
or work bench, or in the break room.
As people approach the later-in-life days, the
days of youthful exploration, when life felt like
one big blind date, are fading. Schedules compress
or become nonexistent, priorities change and people
often become pickier in what they want in their
friends. Pickier, that is fussier, choosier, very
careful or too careful about choosing or accepting
things, or, hard to please. As external conditions
change, it becomes tougher to meet the three
conditions experts have considered crucial to
making close friends: closeness; repeated,
unplanned interactions; and a setting that them to
let their guard down and confide in each other.
How and why? Well the ‘why’ is pretty
easy to determine. Friendship is a friendly feeling
or attitude, kindness or help given to someone. We
all need some of that. But ‘how’,
that’s the thorn on the rose bush … a
tricky, sticky subject with many twists and
turns.
Associating with people with common interests as
yours is one way to find friends. Join clubs or
meet people with the same hobby or collection of
artifacts, such as kites or sea shells. If you
can’t find a group, then form a group with
common interests. Or join a weekly card game, but
beware of this source. If you are too good a card
player you may create enemies and not friends.
Bowling and golf go along the same line as cards,
but you can have fun and then be bad when you must
to keep your new friends. And remember, some people
like winners and others like losers. This is a go
as you play determination you must make. Whatever
the situation is, always say nice things and make
an effort to smile. And when you meet friends, make
friends with their friends. It adds to the mix.
And a good place to mix is one of the local
sports bar or grill and bar. They always have a
group of people doing what you are doing …
looking for friends. And if you are into sports you
will fit right in. You just have to put a curb on
the drinking so again you don’t create enemies
instead of friends. A health club is another good
mingling place with people with the same interest
as you, getting fit or losing weight. And speaking
of health, remember the best vitamin for making
friends is B1. Dali Lama has something to say about
that: “Old friends pass away, new friends
appear. It is just like the days. An old day
passes, a new day arrives. The important thing is
to make it meaningful: a meaningful friend - or a
meaningful day.”
©2013, Patrick
Kennedy
* * *
Man arrives as a novice at each age of his life.
- Nicolas Chamfort
Patrick
M. Kennedy (P Manvel Kennedy) has been a
professional writer, editor, and graphic artist for
over 30 years. He is the author of three books:
More
Fun with Retirement: A coffee break for
seniors,
How
to Have Fun with
Retirement, and
Being
a Senior Citizen: You rnew phase of life with
many questions looking for
answers. and his
latest book: More Fun with Retirement: A
coffee break for seniors. He currently works from
Boise, Idaho. In the past he has worked from
Seattle, Indianapolis, and Las Vegas. He keeps busy
because he knows it is important when writing or
editing any material with a particular objective in
mind, for either personal use or business goals, to
present ideas with quality, clarity and accuracy.
He can do that, and he does most of it himself, but
he occasionally must call upon qualified associates
for assistance.
"My Resume shows me as an
experienced professional writer and editor who
specializes in the English language. With years of
professional experience in the
writing/editing/graphics field, I offer quality
services to both individual and business clients,
with prompt and accurate solutions designed to meet
their needs, and online editing services and
writing services for easy and quick results.
www.abetterword.com
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