The Menstuff® library lists pertinent books on Men's Lives.
The
Mystic's Wheel of the Year 2005: A multifaith calender
reflecting eco-egalitarian spirituality. It features holy days
reflecting the non-patriarchal, mystical God-Goddess roots of
Judiasm (Kabbalism), Christianity (Wisdom Tradition), Islam
(Sufism), Baha'ism and Buddhism (Tantra/Zen). In includes a focus
on milestones, teachers, and activists in mysticism and
environmentalists, and the human rights and peaces movements,
PO Box 77167, Washington, D.C. 20013, 800.821.6604 or
wheeloftheyear@bookarts.com,
Page Two, 2002, ISSN 1092-8855
Abrahamson, Vicki, Mary Meehan, Larry
Samuel, The Future Ain't What it Used to Be: The 40
cultural trends transforming your job, your life, your world.
The map to your future is hidden within the forty cultural trends
presented in this extraordinary book. You'll find out why Beehives
are the communities of our future. How Technomorphing will
intensify our love/hate relationship with technology. Where Soul
Searching will take us in the next millennium. Which
Zentrepreneurs will redefine business as we know it. Best of all,
Iconoculture offers practical suggestions for turning the decades
ahead to your favor with their iconogasms. More than two hundred
of these pithy tips show you how to leverage trends to transform
your job, your life, your world. This book is organized into
quick, easy-to-digest bytes and loaded with graphic goodies. Read
this book and the future will be yours. Riverhead Books, 1998
Adams, Sharon, Best Man: Selections
from the first three years of Man
magazine. This is a collection of essays, interviews, articles
and poems selected from the first three years of
MAN! Magazine. For readers of MAN!, it iwll be
no surprise that while all the pieces are about men, there is a
great diversity of viewpoint and focus. There are, after all, as
many stories as there are men, each with its own vision of the man
and his sense of masculinity. In MAN! we searech for
the many new models for modern man being lived on our streets and
in our homes. Some of the articles look at the psychology of men,
some at family relationships, some are concerned with modern
cultural patterns and others examine myths and stories from the
past. There seems to be no typical man in our world today, and we
reflect this diversity here. Mandala Publications, 1992
ISBN 0-9633927-3-5 Buy
This Book!
Arndt, Thomas Frederick, Men in America.
For fifteen years, men have been the focus of the author's street
photographs: men at work, men in transit, men at bars, men in
uniform, men at rest. He describes the photos as "pictures
of...our male family," and in them he documents, through his
unique vision, an Everyman as full of pathos as Arthur Miller's
Loman. He provides an unrelenting look at the often lonely,
sometimes alienated, always eyecatching position of American men
in contemporary society. Men are always looking. For something. He
captures their common expressions and gestures against a backgrop
of tickertape parades, the New Orleans jazz festival, the
Holocaust Survivors convention, and gatherings of street punks.
These photos bring out the raw dilemma of men and the uncertain
assumption about their new roles in society today. National Museum
of American Art, 1994. ISBN 1-881-616-19-3 Buy
This Book!
Birmingham, John and Dirk Flinthart,
How to be a Man. THe authors have learned the hard way how
to be civilised successful and cool. Now they make it easy for the
unititiated Australian Male to achieve unimagined heights of
sophistication, expertise and personal magnetism. In this book,
they answer questions many men are just too embarrassed to ask,
including: How do you swallow a sword? How do you dress well
without looking like a complete goose? And how do you talk
intelligently about Salvador Dali, Copernicus and Simone de
Beauvoir without sounding like a pompous git? In
tackling these and hundreds of other serious subjects, they enlist
the aid or experts as diverse as Alex Buzo, Paul Barry, Len Evans
and Helen Wellings. John once lived in a house so filthy that a
rat died of pleasure under six inches of rubbish on the living
room floor. Now he lives with his lawyer wife in an apartment with
polished floorboards and knows how to make real coffee. Dirk wrote
COasting: the backpacker's guide to the east coast of Australia
and the pulp fiction classic Brotherloy Love. They attened the
University of Queensland together for much of the 1980s. Duffy
& Snellgrove Sydney, dands@magna.com.au,
1999 ISBN: 1-875-989-28-5 Buy
This Book!
Boyles, Denis, The Lost Lore of a Man's Life: Lots of cool
stuff guys used to know but forgot about the great outdoors,
Harper, 1997
Brizendine, Louann, The Male
Brain: A breakthrough understanding of how men and boys
think. By eight weeks after conception, the male brain is
flooded with enough testosterone to radically alter its structure.
And over the course of a lifetime, a male's brain will be shaped
and reshaped by genes and sex hormones, resulting in the behaviors
that alternately attach and exasperate, intrigue and baffle women
- and that remain equally mysterious to men themselves. Drawing on
her clinical work and the research in many fields, from
neuroscience to behavioral endocrinology, the author reveals that
the male brain: Is a problem-solving machine. Thrives under
competition and is obsessed with rank and hierarchy. At certain
points in its development has difficulty following the pitch and
cadence of female speech. Has an area of sexual pursuit 2.5 times
larger than the female's brain. CD, Random House Audio, www.randomhouseaudio.com,
2010, 978-0-7393-8401-5 
Byers, Kenneth, Man in Transition: His role as father,
son, friend and lover. A book for all men and women that for
the first time puts the responsbility of relationships where it
belongs - at the feet of the contemporary man. The man who is part
of every single male alive; the man who strives to be understood,
works to be successful and dreams of being a causal part of
meaningful relationships with his family, friends and coworkers.
Ths is today's man. This is everyday, ordinary, man. This is the
man in transition. Journey's Together, 1990 ISBN 0-9619040-3-8
Buy
This Book!
Byers, Kenneth, WWTMMA? (Who was
that masked man anyway?) A collection of anecdotes on
growing up. Slightly less than short stories, these anecdotal
vignettes bring the masculine experience of life to the reader
with humor, humility, sensitivity and insight. To say that this is
a "men's" book would neglect the fact that these pages reflect all
human experiences, as reported through the eyes of a man but
shared by men and women alike. The insight within would help many
women understand a bit more about the man behind the mask. In "The
Men's Group" the author talks about the forming of his first men's
group and the awareness that they were all walking tall but
holding on to the same fears. And, in their two years together,
they covered many "men's issues." That group has since
drifted to many corners of the land, but when the author is asked
by someone "What men's issues are?", few have any idea why he
laughs and why a tear comes to his eye. Very enjoyable reading
that can fit nicely into a break in your day, no matter how much
time you set aside. Journeys Together Publishing, 1993
ISBN 0-9619040-4-6 Buy
This Book!
Chabon, Michael, Manhood: The
pleasures and regrets of a husband, father and son. A shy
manifesto, an impractical handbook, the true story of a fabulist,
an entire life in parts and pieces, this book is the first
sustained work of personal writing from the author. In these
insightful, provocative, slyly interlinked essays, one of our most
brilliant and humane writers presents his autobiography and his
vision of life in the way so many of us experience our own lives:
as a series of reflections, regrets and reexaminations, each
sparked by an encounter, in the present, that holds some legacy of
the past. HarperCollins, www.harpercollings.com,
2009 ISBN 978-0-06-149018-7 
Chu, Chin-Ning, Do Less, Achieve
More: Discover the hidden power of giving in. In
our modern age, we seem to be in chaos all the time. We busy
ourselves to the point of exhaustion, give up sleep to do even
more, rush here, rush there, go everywhere and get nowhere. We
believe that an enormous effort is required to achieve success,
and if we fail, it is because we didn't work hard enough. Here we
learn that the most successful people do not necessarily work
harder. In fact, they are often more at ease than the people
around them. The truth is that success comes to those who find a
balance between effort and ease, striving and compromise. For
those who know these secrets, prosperity seems more like the
result of good luck or being in the right place at the right time
- the pieces just come together. Using simple metaphors and
exercises, and offering immediate applications, the author
explains how you can discover this power of doing less and
achieving more. You will learn the art of fine-tuning and focusing
your actions, putting your mind at ease and seeing the fun in the
game of life, and discovering the unlimited, miracle-producing
power of giving in to and working with - rather than fighting
against - your successful destiny. Regan Books, www.harpercollins.com
1998
Crose, Royda, Why Women Live Longer than
Men: and what men can learn from them. In the game of
life, women are winning by over sever years. What are they doing
differently? And, what are the lessons men can learn?
Are women biologically predisposed to live longer? What
psychological characteristics can women teach men to help them
live longer? Can women's changing role in society
enhance their prospects for an even longer life? In
this provocative book, the author reveals how women's capacity for
flexibility, connection and resilience allows them to sustain and
survive life's inevitable disappointments and crises. And, we
learn how boys and men can also develop these attitudes and
behaviors, which may add years to their lives. Jossey- Bass
www.josseybass.com 1997
Buy
This Book!
Davis, Donn, Survival Skills for the
Modern Man: Life, love, work, play. Get the girl,
life it up, make your mark, be the man. Here is your cheat sheet
for getting what you want in life. It painlessly provides the
essential tips, guidelines and rules you need for getting ahead,
impressing others, and living the good life with style.
Contemporary Books 1998 Buy
This Book!
Deida, David, Blue Truth: A
spiritual guide to life & death and love & sex.
Be the first man in your men's group to get an advance reading
copy of this book! Not on the shelves and available only from the
publisher, this is a powerful, heart opening book. Profound,
challenging, an poetically beautiful, this book is page after page
of deep, naked truths, an unexpected teaching of enormous value
and passion. This is one of the clearest, most original and useful
guides to authentic spiritual practice. No one interested in real
spiritual growth can afford to be unaware of this work. Plexus
www.deida.com 888.626.9662 1999
ISBN 1-889762-14-8 Buy
This Book
Deida, David, It's a Guy
Thing: An owner's manual for women, David Deida.
"Why does he do that?" is the great American woman's battle cry.
Now there is help for any woman who has ever
wondered: Why do men gawk when an attractice woman
walks by? Why are many men turned off by an aggressive
woman? And why do most men prefer reading the newspaper
to having an intimate discussion? This book helps
explain the fundamental differences between women and men and
offers insight as to why men act the way they do. By revealing how
to complement men's differences, the book empowers women to
improve relationships with all of the men in their lives including
friends, fathers, boyfriends and bosses. Health Communication,
www.hci-online.com 1997
ISBN 1-55874-464-9 Buy
This Book!
Deida, David, The Way of the Superior Man:
A man’s guide to mastering the challenges of women, work and
sexual desire,. The author takes the reader on a powerful
journey into the heart of the contemporary masculine experience.
With uncommon honesty and unparalleled insight into the deepest
desires of the masculine heart, he explores the most challenging
and important issues in men’s lives. Covering everything from
work and career, to dealing with sex, women, and love, to finding
purpose in an increasingly superficial and mechanical world, he
reveals how a man can live a life of fulfillment without
compromise by relaxing into the truth of his very being,
discovering the deepest vision and giving his gifts without
holding anything back. What emerges is a wholly revolutionary look
at what it means to be a man in today’s world, as well as an
astonishingly practical guidebook to living a masculine life of
integrity, authenticity and freedom. Plexus www.deida.com
(See The Men's Challenge
Deck: Practicing the Way of the Superior Man) 1997
ISBN 1-889762-10-5 Buy
This Book!
Diamond, Jed, Inside Out: Becoming my
own man. This is the first book to take you below the surface
to look at men emerging today. It offers men ways of becoming more
completely themselves rather than living out stereotyped roles. It
allows women to know men as they never have before. It shows men
and women how to find their common bond as friends and lovers.
jed@menalive.com Fifth Wave,
1983 ISBN 0-911761-35-7 Buy
This Book!
Diamond, Jed, Warrior's Journey Home: Healing men,
healing the planet. If we believe the media, the men's
movement is something of a joke, and recovery is a passing fad.
Yet if we could get inside the hearts and souls of the over 80
million men in this country whose manhood is constantly under
attack, and who continue to be confused about what it means to be
a man, we would know a different reality. If we could feel the
pain of the nearly 50 million men who are suffering from
addictions, most in "manly" silence, we would know a different
reality. If we could hear the cries of women who work with, live
with, and love these wounded warriors, and must deal with their
deadly outburst of rage and stony silences, we would know a
different reality. If we could sense the sorrow of the earth as
another bulldozer rips through its flesh in the name of progress,
we would know a different reality. Why is there such a discrepancy
between the view that the issues of men and recovery are
passé and the deeper reality that we have only scratched
the surface? This book explores the origins of addictions and the
ways in which men lost the primal connection with their masculine
selves. Generic recovery programs don't go far enough to heal
these wounds: there is a need for programs that speak to the
unique experience of men. This book details ten tasks of mature
masculinity and seven stages of recovery that men can use to guide
them in their return to a more powerful and authentic experience
of manhood. jed@menalive.com
or www.thirdagewellness.com
New Harbinger, 1994 ISBN 1-87923-60-1 Buy
This Book!
Druck, Ken, Secrets Men Keep: Breaking the silence
barrier.What are the secrets men keep? What powerful
facts about themselves do all men withhold from their loved ones,
their friends, and their colleagues? Can men learn to unlock
their secrets - and achieve a fuller, healthier, more rewarding
life? How can they break the seal of silence and turn their
secrets into strengths? This book offers, for the first
time in book form, the groundbreaking program developed by the
author, a clinical psychologist, for his widely acclaimed Alive
and Male seminars. This program, which has been conducted in
cities throughout the country, challenges men to open up to
entirely new and unexplored, yet remarkably accessible,
possibilities within themselves and their relationships. Here, at
last, is an emancipation proclamation for every man. In clear,
concise language, this book pinpoints the problems that have
hindered men emotionally since boyhood, and which continue to
limit them in their adult lives. Then with great insight and
wisdom, this step-by-step workbook provides no-nonsense advice,
information, and invaluable exercises to help men identify and
overcome these limitations in themselves and their relationships.
Timely, important - and workable - this is the one essential guide
for the man who is tired of hiding out and who wants to be more
connected to his mate, his family, his friends....and for every
woman who wants to better understand, and love, her man.
Doubleday, 1985 ISBN: 0-385-23092-3 Buy
This Book!
Durdant-Hollamby, Barry, The Male
Agenda. This book is a ground-breaking work that tackles the
truth about men's lives today. Full of true stories, practical
ideas and thought provoking questions, this book explores subjects
such as money, success, sex, death and fathering. Both men and
women will find this a fascinating - and at times challenging -
read. It offers a vision of hope for the future that every reader
will aspire to. Art of Change Publishing, www.artofchange.co.uk,
2001, ISBN 0-95300-632-8 Order direct from publishing. Please
tell them Menstuff sent you.
Faludi, Susan, Stiffed: The
betrayal of the American man. If, as men are so often told,
they are the dominant sex, why do so many of them feel dominated,
done in by the world? Anyone who reads a magazine,
watches a TV talk show, or listens to a radio call-in program has
heard the evidence: America is having a masculinity
crisis. Angry White Males have become a voting bloc. Dads are
deadbeat. Boys are on the rampage. And with each schoolyard
shooting and presidential peccadillo, with each corporate sexual
harassment lawsuit and laid-off worker gone berserk, the media
offer up the stock pronouncemets: Men are out of
control, overcontrolling, dangerous, violent and even, it has been
written, obsolete. Their troubles are said to be internal, the
result of testosterone poisoning, Y chromosomes, attention
deficit disorder, a warlike nature. Furthermore, it's charged, men
have only themselves to blame, for aren't they the ones in control
of the culture? Or are they? In this new book, the same
author that just a few years ago trashed men in Backlash,
turns her often fictitious analysis and reporting to the problems
of men and came up with, to her, a revolutionary diagnosis. (Most
men and male therapists could have told her this for atleast the
past 15 years if she wasn't so intent to selling her previous book
and would have asked.) Walla: Men's problems aren't the
product of biology, or of such trumped-up enemies as feminism and
affirmative action, but of a modern social tragedy. By finally
listening to men's stories in their own voices, by taking them on
their own terms, the author uncovers a buried history - the untold
story of how America made a glittering set of promises to the men
of the baby-boom generation ...and proceeded to break every one of
them. The betrayal of the American man has been perpetrated on
many fronts, from the boardroom to the football stadium, from the
army recruitment center to the suburban living soom and from talk
shows to elementary schools and college gender studies programs.
This book takes us on a journey through a contemporary masculine
landscape littered with broken promises and into the lives of
individual men whose accounts reveal the heart of the male
dilemma. With an empathetic vision that breaks down the familiar
lines of gender battle, she travels deep into the meaning of male
anguish. She intimately chronicles the struggles of industrial
workers, sports fans, combat veterans, evangelical husbands, media
executives, movie stars, porn actors, militiamen, astronauts, and
"bad" boys - whose sense that they've lost their skills, jobs,
civic roles, wives, teams, and secure futures is only one symptom
of a larger and more profound collapse. She pinpoints men's
greatest antagonist and discovers that it is not what conventional
wisdom would have us believe. What keeps men from revolting
against their circumstances? Her explanation for that
mystery opens up the possiblity that men's coming rebellion could
emancipate both sexes from their true and mutural enemy, a
cultural force that constrains us all but lay the groundwork for a
culture that affirms the needs of everyone. William Morrow
& Co, 1999 ISBN 0-688-12299-X Buy
This Book
Fanning, Patrick & Matthew McKay, Being a
Man: A guide to the new masculinity. A practical
book for men which details what we can do to improve the quality
and length of our lives. Things your father probably never told
you - but should have - appear here. Based on a 25-year friendship
between the authors, this book emerges from the problem-solving
skills necessary to sustain such a relationship. Practical advice
for every man concerned with achieving a sense of personal
integrity and for every enlightened feminist who wants to know
what contemporary men are saying about what it means to be a man.
New Harbinger Publications, 1994 ISBN 1-879237-40-7 Buy
This Book!
Farrell, Warren, The Myth of Male
Power. The author has embarked upon an extraordinary mission
that concerns us all - to bring the sexes back together. Backed by
a stunning array of facts, this book shatters the singular
assumption that most keeps men and women apart - the belief that
men have the power. This myth, says the author, hurts everyone -
by making women feel oppressed and angry and men feel unloved and
unappreciated. It has fueled hate between the sexes at a point in
history that would otherwise have the greatest potential for love
between the sexes. It has done this by keeping us ignorant of male
powerlessness. This courageous book, filled with staggering facts
gathered from numerous reliable sources, will empower both sexes
to ask the questions we need to begin a genuine dialogue. This
book focuses on men's perspectives so men can speak up, so there
can be dialogue, so there can be love. Simon & Schuster,
1993 warren@warrenfarrell.com
or www.warrenfarrell.com
ISBN: 0-671-79349-7 Buy
This Book!
Farrell, Warren, Why Men Are the Way They
Are. In this riveting book, you'll find potentially
life-changing answers to these other often-asked
questions: Why are men afraid of commitment? Why
are they threatened by successful women? Why are the most
attractice women often difficult for men to get along
with? Why can't men listen? If women are liberated, why
do so many still like to have men pay for dinner and then call
them in the morning? Why are men and women so
preoccupied with physical beauty? Why do so many men have so
few really close friendships with other men? The ways
the sexual revolution and the women's movement have affected women
have been well documented in the last two decades. But what have
these movements done to men? For nearly twenty years, over
100,000 women and men have experienced the other sex's point of
view in his workshops. As a result, he has come up with
provocative new theories about the reasons love, intimacy, and
commitment mean different things to women and men; how to change a
man for the better (without just preparing him for someone else);
what makes people successful at the office but can make them
unsuccessful at home; when a discussion between a women and a man
is helpful and when it is harmful; and how men are much less
"powerful" than we ever thought possible. McGraw Hill, 1986
warren@warrenfarrell.com or
www.warrenfarrell.com
ISBN 0-07-019974-4 Buy
This Book!
Farrell, Warren, Women Can't Hear What Men
Don't Say: Destroying myths, creating love. This book
shows how to break through the invisible barriers that keep men
from expressing their deepest feelings and keep intimacy from its
fullest development. The author demonstrates how gender-based
anger at home and at work, omnipresent media images, and the
overall culture combine with men's own fear of expressing feelings
to misrepresent the inner and outer reality of men's lives. The
result is stereotyping, misinformation, widespread alienation of
the sexes from each other in both long-term relationships and
first-time encounters, unnecessary divorces, and both sexes' being
deprived of the intimacy they crave. Looking at the world from
both men's and women's perspectives, the author provides a
remarkable and easy-to-follow communication program that shows
couples how to move beyond the current tripwire assumptions that
lead to so much gender-based conflict and allows them to
understand and love each other more fully than ever. He has
discovered not what works in theory, but what works in life. His
methods are the culmination of years of real-life experiences with
thousands of men and women in workshops, groups, and seminars. And
you'll find that these methods that create love at home can also
create success and respect in the workplace. Tarcher/Putnam,
www.penguinputnam.com
1999. warren@warrenfarrell.com
or www.warrenfarrell.com
ISBN 0-87477-988-X Buy
this book!
Fossum, Merle, Men in
Recovery: Finding Our Direction (formerly "Catching
Fire"), Hazelden, 1989
Frey, Chris, Men at Work: An Action Guide to
Masculine Healing. This is about men, movement and healing. It
is a toolbox, a container of methods for men to safely learn
healing skills. For some, the healing may mean moving through and
beyond past traumas; for some it may mean moving deeper into their
hearts to the rhythms of the body; and for others it may be
discovering the wonders of near stillness. Whatever the focus,
within the pages of this book, one will find opportunities to
revive the spirit, reclaim a passion for life, and more fully
experience the excitement and uncertainty of each moment. This is
more than a chance to redefine the problems of one's life. It's a
call to action. Islewest mjgraham@carcomm.com
or www.islewest.com 1997
Buy
This Book!
Guerin, Lisa, Patricia Gima & Nolo
Press Editors, California Law, Nolo's Pocket Guide. As
citizens, we are presumed to know the law. Ignorance, as many of
us learn the hard way, is no excuse - and most books about the law
are written for lawyers, making them difficult, if not impossible
to understand. Here is the answer: A wealth of
information on the laws that affect Californian's every day
including hundreds of topics organized in easy-to-find categories
- just look up the topic you have a question about and get a
clear, concise explanation of the law. Categories include:
children, relationships, consumers' rights, employees' rights,
traffic and vehicle laws, debts, loans and credit, courts and
lawsuits, landlords and tenants, small businesses and many others.
Nolo Press, 1998
Harding, Christopher, editor,
Wingspan: Inside the men's movement. This book
takes you behind the scenes of the portion of the men's movement
dubbed "mythopoetic", one of the most important, and least
understood, phenomena of recent times. Feminist Betty Friedan
called this new tendency of men to look inward and back into
history "a deceptively quiet movement." What is driving
men in every increasing numbers into the woods to beat drums and
share grief that they can't articulate in their everyday
lives? What are men discovering that keeps them coming
back to support groups week after week? This
straight-from-the-shoulder book is written by and for men who are
rethinking traditional views of masculinity. For women, who will
never get to experience men's events firsthand, these amazing
gatherings come alive, here, in words and pictures. The most
prominent thinkers and leaders of the movement introduce its key
ideas, while less well-known writers share with humor and
compassion what it feels like to venture into this exciting new
territory. St. Martin's Press, 1992 ISBN 0-312-07886-2
Buy
This Book!
Hartmann, Thom, We the People: A
call to take back America. America faces its greatest threazt
since the Civil War. The worst fears of the Founders are being
realized as powerful corporate interests have taken over our
culture and representative government. We the People now face a
fundamental choice: take back our country...or do nothing,
and become victims of tyranny and empire. "Not only does this book
tell you what's really going on, but it even draws you a picture
of it. Read, learn, act!" Jim Hightower, author of Thieves in
High Places. www.thomhartmann.com.
CoreWay Media, www.coreway.com,
2004, ISBN 1-882109-38-4 
Kammer, Jack, Good Will Toward
Men: Women talk candidly about the balance of power between
the sexes. "This book is a truly heartwarming experience for
anyone who believes in equality. It is a series of interviews wth
women who are talking openly about their perceptions of the
balance of power between men and women in society. The insight,
sense of fair play, compassion, and just common decency shown by
the interviewees gives me hope that the tide is turning in the war
against pop-feminist idological nonsense. Many of the women
interviewed are in the "helping professions", some of the others
are attorneys or writers. The common thread in every case is that
they came to the conclusion that, while feminism in its more
positive forms has indeed liberated women to realize more of their
potential, much of it has degenerated into an attack on men and an
attempt to use claims of victimization as a political weapon. Some
of these women acknowledge the tremendous sexual leverage that
many women have over men, and how this causes men to compensate by
trying in one way or another to even things up. This is a great
book. It is a must-read for any women who really wants to love men
and know she isn't alone, and for any man who needs to see that
not every women in the world is Andrea Dworkin." - Wilbur
Wormwood. St. Martin's Press, 1994 ISBN 0-312-10471-5
Buy
This Book!
Kammer, Jack, If Men
Have All the Power How Come Women Make the Rules. "The
contempt this book would inspire among the women in house would be
immense. I'll let one of my male competitors be the one who gets
pummeled." VP/Exec Editor with a major New York publishing house
in a letter to the author's agent 3/19/98. Some men's
self-published books we've seen we would agree. However, this
book, a follow up to his successful Good Will Toward
Men: Women talk candidly about the balance of power between
the sexes published by St. Martin's Press in 1994, is
definitely worth a read! No one will publish it so the author
wants you to take a copy. Free. Self Published. This book is
available from www.RulyMob.com
using Acrobat Reader3.0 or newer which is also available at
www.adobe.com. Comments welcome
at comments@RulyMob.com
2000
Kaye, Harvey, Male Survival: Masculinity without myth.
Do you suffer from the Superman Syndrome? Are you an
Achiever, Provider, Playboy, Sexual Athlete or Neanderthal Ideal
lost in the twentieth century? Do you feel threatened,
obsolete, insecure, impotent and up against a wall? This book
will take you on a sophisticated and irreverent jaunt through the
obfuscation of maculine myths to the liberating possiblities for
modern man. It challenges the mistakes and misconceptions that
civilization has taken thousands of years to erect. It rescues men
from the siren song of the Masculine Mystique - from myths that
stereotype them in roles, freeze them in the status quo, and
distort their humanity. Surrounded by conflicting standards, and
besieged by unrelenting demands to be more than whatever they are,
no wonder men feel increasingly insecure, obsolete, and up against
the wall. This book offers men and women new definitions of
masculinity, new perspectives with which to cope with the
requirements of modern society. It is a way out of the Masculinity
Maze to the liberating possibiities of realistic expectations. For
every man who wonders who he is, where he is going, and why - for
every woman who wonders, too - here is a male survival kit.
Grosset & Dunlap, 1974
Keen, Sam, Fire in the Belly: On
being a man. What does our culture tell "real men" they have
to do? Join a fraternity. Get a letter in football,
baseball or basketball. Conquer a lot of women. Be tough. Don't
show feelings. Dominate, succeed, win... The trouble with the old
definitions is that they don't work anymore - and maybe they never
did. With traditional notions of manhood under attack, today's men
(and women) are looking for a new vision of masculinity. This
groundbreaking book presents an alternative vision of virtures and
virility for a modern age. It's an inspiring guide for men seeking
new personal ideals of strength, potency and warriorship for a
fuller, more passionate life. Ask almost any man "How does it feel
to be a man these days? Is manhood honored, respected,
celebrated?" Those who answer usually say they feel blamed,
demeaned, and attacked. They're told: "Men are too
aggressive. Too insensitive. Too macho. Too much like little boys.
Too wimpy. Too violent. Too obsessed with sex. Too detached to
care. Too busy. Too rational. Too lost to lead. Too dead to
feel." It's a confusing picture. How men are
supposed to act and what they are supposed to become is not clear.
At no time in history have there been so many restless,
questioning men looking for new roles, ways of being, and healing
from male woundedness. This book helps provide meaningful answers.
It begins with a frank discussion of men's unconscious bondage to
"Woman," not a woman, but to the primal power that women wield
over men. Only when men begin to learn the uniquely male mysteries
can they go on to build nurturing, satisfying relationships with
each other, with a mate, and with a family. Although he explores
the meaning of being a person from the perspective of the male
experience, the story of injury and promise he tells is relevant
to both sexes. In this way, this book is written for women, too,
as they strive to understand the men they love, raise, and live
with. But most of all this spirit-lifting, hopeful and helpful
guide to a new manhood is aimed at men in their quest for being
and fulfillment. From the ancient forces that send men on the
hero's journey to the contemporary drives that have changed the
direction of that journey, this book tells the story of the search
for what it means to be a man. This empowering, enriching book
offers a path for that search. Bantam, 1991
ISBN 0-553-07188-2 Buy
This Book!
Kennedy, James, Jimmy the Bartender's
Guide to Life. The men of America are asking "What would Jimmy
say? Sure, he's just a bartender. But he has more horse
sense than any therapist, psychologist, or self-proclaimed maven
will ever have. He's an old-fashioned, bow-tied barkeep who
happens to have some of the best answers around to life's problems
and the guts to look you in the eye and tell 'em to you straight.
He writes one of the most popular columns in Men's Health,
which just happens to be one of the most popular men's magazines
in the world. Daily, men from Sheboygan to Shanghai write letters,
send e-mails, even call on the phone to get his advice. The book
also includes Jimmy's Lists, including the best ballpark brews,
the best regional pick-up lines, the 10 most sacred saloon
commandments and Jimmy's own barroom wife-screening test. Rodale
Press www.menshealthbooks.com
1999 ISBN 1-57954-172-0 Buy
this book!
Kipnis, Aaron, Knights Without Armor: A practical guide
for men in quest of masculine soul. The nights of ancient
times were heavily armored from head to toe. These men in steel
were invincible in battle - until the crossbow was invented. This
new technology, intorduced in the late medieval times, gave arrows
the force to penetrate even the thickest armor. The armored knight
quickly became a thing of the past as men realized that they could
no longer remain safe behind their impervious ccoverings. However,
the knightly ideals of chivalry and masculine honor, and the
spiritual quest for the Holy Grail persisted for centuries. Today,
men doing battle in the marketplace have donned a new sort of
armor. Many powerful men have constructed a heroic personality
that is hard, inflexible and, like the amor of old, heavy to drag
around. It is difficult to feel much pleasure or joy in life when
one is burdened with a self-image that says: in order to be a
man you must be tough and cool as steel. In today's society,
however, men are discovering, like their medieval counterparts,
that they are no longer impervious to the armor-piercing arrows
slung by people who have lost connection to their souls. This book
weds ancient myths of masculinity to the subjective experience of
modern men and the objective perspectives of hundreds of studies
from various scientific fields. What emerges is a fresh vision and
new understanding of men that points the way for a new male
psychology and spirituality. This book presents a rich adventure
of self-discovery for the male reader who will undoubtedly hear
many of his own issues expressed by the male voices in this book.
Women readers will gain new insights into the inner lives of men,
deepen their understanding of the forces that shape the men in
their lives, and learn how to support men's changes in a changing
world. This knowledge will be helpful in imporving relations
between men and women. Jeremy P Tarcher/Perigee Books, 1992
ISBN 0-87477-704-6 Buy
This Book!
Kita, Joe, Another Shot: How I relived
my life in less than a year. Have you ever wondered "What
could have been?" We all have paths not taken and unfulfilled
desires, but rarely do we give ourselves a chance to explore them.
When the author turned forty, however, he set a goal - to becaome
"a man with no regrets." In one year he relived his top-twenty
personal regrets, and he recounts his adventures here. From hiring
a butler to experience a life of luxury to convincing his
high-school basketball coach to let him try out for the squad
twenty years after getting cut; and tracking down his first car -
a Chevy Camaro - to revisiting his sexual peak by enrolling with
his wife at sex camp and proposing to her all over again - the way
he wished he had - he reclaims the past and sets right his
mistakes and blunders. This is a laugh-aloud yet profoundly wise
book that speaks to everyone who has ever wished for a second
chance. Penguin, www.penguinputnam.com
2002 ISBN 0-14-200061-2 Buy
This Book!
Lee, John, Flying Boy: Healing the wounded man, The
author, well known in the men's movement and the recovery
movement, sets out to share with us his growth through his own
troubles based on his prior relationships. His insights are well
worth the read, as he shares with us the enlightenment he
experiences as he tries to deal with the weight of his parents,
his early rejections, and his inability to express the rage he
feels in an appropriate way. His story is sometimes almost too
personal: we don't really want to be there through ALL of it,
somehow. And yet, we are transfixed even on the most basic
responses he feels. His progress is steady and we are rewarded by
the goals he achieves. Alas, like real life, there is no happy
ending with the girl, the horse and the sunset. Still, the changes
he feels, the inner pains he quells, these are all worth the pain
he still carries, the fights he still has to fight. An enduring
volume, and a must for the man still struggling with his father,
struggling with his pain, or not sure why he struggles, only that
he does. Health Communications 1989 ISBN: 1558740066 Buy
This Book!
Lee, John, Flying Boy Book II: Journey
continues. While this book stands on its own and can easily be
read without having read Flying Boy: Healing the wounded
man, it does pick up where this emotionally moving book leaves
off. This book is about the fears of intimacy, adandonment and
commitment and how to overcome them. It also answers the questions
thousands have asked, "What ever happened to Laurel? What is
John's relationship with his fahter like after having confronted
him? When is there going to be a book written for
Flying Girls (women who can't commit)?" This book
answers all those questions and more. It combines the author's
experience, strength and hope wth insights gained from years of
working with men's groups, Adult Children and his own work in
12-Step programs. It's also the first book that unites the growing
men's movement with the recovery movement. It will help anyone who
reads it to identify an addictive relationship and see that adults
can't be abandoned. Health Communications, 1991
ISBN 1-55874-180-1 Buy
This Book!
Lee, John, The Wounded Lover: A book
for women raising sons & men coming to terms with their
fathers. Most men today didn't have the benefit of real
fathering. Even if their fathers were physically preesnt, they
were emotionally gone. This book shows why many of the
difficulties men face - inability to commit, to give or receive
emotionally, to express feelings - are a direct result of the
"hole left in men's souls" by their father's abandonment. This
book will show men where they come from; help them stop shifting
their woundedness onto women, family, society and the earth; and
point them toward the healing that comes when one is able to feel
good about being a man. It will help women understand men -
fathers, spouses, brothers, sons. It is a rare reading experience
that can transform, even save, lives. Ally, 1995 ISBN
0-915408-53-8 Buy
This Book!
Lincoln, Kenneth, Men Down West: A
three-generational study into the lives of men down west, from
Nebraska to California, Kenneth Lincoln. This provides a
particular view of American manhood, not as a "universal norm" but
as a profoundly human experience. This single void hits a new
high, tracing a landscape often obscured by centuries of
stereotyping. Women will particularly treasure this book. Capri
Press 1997 Buy
This Book!
Luciano, Lynne, Looking Good: Male
body image in modern America. Not so long ago, what the
average man did mattered more than how he looked. Since th 1970s,
however, projecting the right look has become more and more
essential. Men once dreaded being accused of vanity; today they
are spending millions of dollars on fitness training,
bodybuilding, hair replacement, and cosmetic surgery in the
relentless pursuit of physical perfection. What has caused
American men to fall into the beauty trap so long assumed to be a
special danger for women? Have they been so addled by the
women's movement that they are responding by becoming more like
women? This book goes beyond facile explanations to look at a
confluence of social, economic, and cultural changes that have
shaped the new cult of male body image in postwar America. In this
journey through the brave new world of male vanity, the author
explores what men are doing to themselves, asks why they are doing
it, and discovers what this new world tells us about American
society today. Hill & Wang, 2001, ISBN 0-8090-6637-8
Buy
This Book!
Lunneborg, Patricia, The Chosen Lives
of Childfree Men. More and more couples nowaways are choosing
not to have children. While much attention has been paid to this
trend from a woman's point of view, men are often seen as having a
secondary role in this choice, as ready to accept whatever their
partners decide. In an age when men are expected to be caregivers
as well as breadwinners and encouraged to take on more parental
responsibilities, this volume argues that they need to be active
participants in this crucial, life-altering decision. Based on
in-depth interviews with 30 American and British childless men,
this is the first book to explore the motives and consequences of
voluntary childnessness from a man's perspective. The interviewees
explain the reasons for their choice and explore its impact on
their freedom, relationships, job opportunities and finances. They
also discuss their mixed feelings, their family background, and
their concern over the world's ever-growing population. The
picture that emerges challenges the sterotype of men who decide
against parenthood as immature, selfish, and irresponsible.
Although each man provides several reasons, the author identifies
nine main typres of childfree men, including workaholics, lifelong
learners, early retirees, stress reducers, and men who don't want
to repeat the mistakes of their parents. Bergin & Garvey
apetri@greenwood.com
1999 ISBN 0-89789-598-3 Buy
this book!
Lunneborg, Patricia, Ou Men: Work through lifelong
learning, Lutterworth, 1997
Maggio, Michael Compiled, Sex, Money
& Sports, Quotations on the only things men
Mares, Theun, The Quest for
Maleness: Avoiding emasculation. Releasing the creative
powers of the true male. Where have all the heroes
gone? In today's world men everywhere are becoming
weaker and more impotent as women challenge them in every field.
What can men do about this? Are men headed for total
emasculation? Or are we facing the battle of the
sexes? Revealing the true nature of masculinity, Toltec
warrior and seer, the author shows men how to get back in touch
with the essential core of their maleness - a core that is nothing
less that the untapped power of creativity. He describes how to
access and release the creative power that is the right and duty
of every true male to exercise. He shows how, by going this, you
will find the wisdom, vision and sense of purpose to be a true
leader, and to stand proud in your masculinity. This book is both
a message of hope and a guidebook for every man who wants to find
his way as a male and walk tall in the world today. Lionheart
Publishing, 1999. lionheart@toltec-foundation.org
or www.toltec-foundation.org
or www.elusivehappiness.com.
ISBN 1-919792-07-4 Buy
This Book!
Marsh, Anthony & Jay Blumenfield, The
Groom's Secret Handbook: how not to screw up the biggest day of
her life,. No man should enter the weird world of matrimony
without this advice. You'll learn everything you need to know
about the engagement, wedding, registering for gifts - from
realizing you have no use for any of this stuff to learning which
stores give cash back on returns. Then there's the bachelor party
and much much more. Fireside Books www.SimonSays.com
1997 Buy
This Book!
McCartney, Bill, What Makes a
Man? 12 promises that will change your life. More
than any other thing today, the author declares, our society needs
men who are willing to stand up and make a difference. Men who,
having counted the cost, are willing to reflect the character of
Jesus Christ in a world of negotiable values, confused identities,
and distorted priorities. But what does it take to be such a
man? How does one become fully Christlike and fully
masculine? That's the guestion the author, Head
Football Coach for the University of Colorado Buffraloes, and
creator of the Promise Keepers, asks a group of well-respected
Christian men. Their answers, drawn from a broad range of
experiences, difficulties, concerns, and ideals, all point to
three common elements - conviction, integrity and action. Men who
make a difference are men of convition. They posses unwavering
belief. Having stepped across the line, they will not be dragged
back for any reason. Men who make a differene are also men of
integrity. By seeking to live their lives with ever-increasing
sincerity and honesty, and by avoiding all expressoins of
deception, they develop both personal confidence and public trust.
And finally, men who make a difference are men of action. Not
settling for good intentions, they choose to make a positive
impact on their families, churches, coworkers and communities. As
you read through the challenging insights and examples presented,
you'll come away with enough practical ideas to help you become an
authentic, Christlike man in each one of your areas of
responsibility. And even more importantly, you'll capture the
vision of what you as a man were designed to be. Because when a
man decides to make a difference, he becomes a different man.
Navpress, 1992 ISBN 0-89109-707-4 Buy
This Book!
Meade, Michael, Men & the Water of
Life: Initiation & the tempering of men. When
generativity, creativity, generosity and the capacity to embrace
life dry up, the Water of Life has gone underground. At such
times, the earth becomes arid, life becomes devoid of meaning, the
ground of culture cracks and splits, and gaps develop among
peoples and between epeople and nature. Only water can bring the
pieces back together, awaken seeds hidden in the ground, and
enliven the parched Tree of Life. One of the most important ways
to call forth the water of life is through story. For years, the
author has been steeped in stories, some from the ground of his
own life, others from the ancient rivers of Celtic, European and
African myth. Still others emerge from years spent as a teacher,
listening to the stories that both men and women carry. From these
stories he derives medicine for healing individual wounds and
uncovers rituals for the remaking of community. Attuned to our
modern needs - the wounds of divorce, addiction and loss, the
moral abandonment of children, the gap between the genders - and
our mythic inheritance, this book offers narratives that reflect
and resonate with the oldest parts of the human psyc Bilhe - the
place where things began and the place where things can begin
again. Harper, 1993 ISBN 0-06-250542-4 Buy
This Book!
Mierzwa, Joseph, The 21st Century Family Legal Guide: The
law you must know to protect yourself, your family, your property
and your money, ProSe Assoc., 1994
Millard, Alan, Equality: A man's
claim. The equality issue from the male pespective and an ethical
society's viewpoint. Have you ever been lost for a defense
against feminists who use their own language and terminology to
promote their misguidd, prejudiccd philosophies? This
book retraces irrational accusations and exposes ill-founded
feminist beliefs which have become standard misinformation in
today's society. It offers strong argument to counteract feminist
conjecture - an argument which has purposely been kept from you by
the media and other sources of feminist propaganda. Finally, here
is a source that takes an unblinking look at the critical issues
being used by feminists to destroy the interaction between men and
women. Northwest Publishing, 1995 www.alanmillard.com
ISBN 1-56901-342-X Buy
This Book!
Newell, Waller R., Editor What is a
Man? 3,000 years of wisdom on the art of manly virture.
At a time when all of America is debating the wayward course of
contemporary manhood, one thing has been missing from the
conversation: a source to which concerned readers might turn
for guidance and inspiration, a path back to the wisdom of our
shared tradition of manly virtures. Missing, that is, until now.
In this book, a historian and commentator collects three thousand
years of the finest and most thought-provoking writings on the
subject of manhood. Introduced and placed in context by the
author's incisive and illuminating commentary, each of the eight
sections in this volume addresses one aspect of the shared
traditions of manliness - from wisdom to chivalry to nobility.
From Aristotle on courage to Sir Thomas Malory on love, honor and
chastity; from Shakespeare on leadership to John Cheever on
adolescence; from Jane Austen on pride to Theodore Roosevelt on
family life - each new voice contributes perspectives and
authority to this multifaceted exploration of virture and
masculinity. And the final section, "The Invisible Man", reflects
the confusions of moden manhood, addressing issues of violence,
media imagery and the role of the counterculture through
commentators as diverse as James Dean, David Foster Wallace and
Kurt Cobain. An anthology of extraordinary scope and depth, this
book reminds us all of the relevance of the manly tradition and
offers a blueprint for men (and women) eager to uphold the honor
of our forefathers' legacy. Regan Books, www.reganbooks.com
2000 ISBN 0-06-039296-7 Buy
This Book!
O'Brien, Glenn, The Style Guy: The
answers to the questions men are asking on sex, manners, grooming,
fashion, travel, women, and the meaning of life. As the
no-nonsense columnist from GQ magazine has helped
thousands of guys naturally develop their own unique sense of
style, now he can help you. Here is practical, down-to-earth
advice on dress, manners, sex, grooming, and dating -- including
cigar and cell-phone etiquette, tips on ordering wine in
restaurants, and the cold, hard facts on cutoff jeans, ribbed tank
tops, black shows with white socks, and the age-old conundrum:
boxers or briefs. If guys (and their girlfriends) are wonderng
about it, then the author has the answers. Having style was never
so easy!. Ballantine, 2000. www.randomhouse.com/BB/
ISBN 0-345-42727-0 Buy
This Book!
Peterkin, Allan, One Thousand
Beards: A cultural history of facial hair. Every man
has the capacity to grow facial hair, but the decision to do so
has always come with layers of meaning. At one time or another
beards have come to represent wisdom, goodness, sorcery,
diabolism, psychological depth and revolution. They have been
purchased, elaborately trimmed, adorned, and dyed. This book is a
witty, comprehensive history of facial hair, documenting its
continuous rise and fall as a trend. With chapters like the
"Medical Beard", the "Gay Beard" and the "Unconscious Beard" (says
Dr Freud: "Sometimes a beard is just a beard"), this book
also shows how manifestations of facial hair have been determined
by class, religious belief, historical precedent, and occupational
status. With style recipes, information on care and upkeep, and
hundreds of pictures of famous men (and women) with facial hair,
this book provides an insightful, lighthearted, and well-groomed
look at the cultural influence of facial hair. Arsenal Pulp Press,
arsenalpulp.com, 2001,
ISBN 1-55152-107-5 Buy
This Book!
Phillis, Samuel, A Sail and Tale of
an Emotional Rescue: Yachtsman beware of Murphy's Law.
This book recounts two journeys aboard a 30-foot sailing sloop,
heading south from the Carolinas to Florida on the Atlantic
Intracoastal Waterway (ICW) and near shore on the Atlantic Ocean.
The story is a factual and sometimes humorous narrative about a
seasoned recreational sailor with 30 years and 13,000 miles of
sailing experience. Filled with photos, this book relates how a
lake sailor transformed into a coastal sailor through many trials
and tribulations, both on sea and in personal life. It's a tale of
survival, introspection, interdependence, and appreciating the
humor of boating inexperience. Xlibris, www.xlibris.com, 2003,
ISBN 1-4134-2172-5 
Price, Jammie, Navigating
Differences: Friendships between gay and straight men.
This book is a one-of-a-kind cross-sexual study that shows you how
today's gay and straight men build, maintain and foster true
friendships. In this activist participatory study, you'll get a
day-in-the-life look at 44 pairs of cross-sexual men's friendships
and see what helps them negotiate the terrain of their emotional,
sexual, psychological and social differences in today's climate of
homophobia and heterosexism. Harrington Park Press, 1999
ISBN 1-56023-952-2 Buy
This Book!
Schlessinger, Laura, Ten Stupid
Things Men do to Mess Up Their Lives. She started with women
in 1994. Now she shares input that she has received from her 400
radio stations and 20,000 calls an house, half of which are men.
An honest sharing of the stupid things men do that diminish our
lives and happiness. It demonstrates a level of sensitivity and
insight that might surprise most women as she provides commonsense
guidelines to show men how to appreciate their own nature and
needs. With humor and wisdom, she urges men to stop trying to save
or transform needy women, recognize and enjoy the need for
intimacy, avoid blind ambition which focuses on externals, realize
their need for control, stop measuring their masculinity with
seed, marry for all the right reasons, be a loving mate, take
pleasure in raising in raising their children, resolve emotional
issues with their mothers and understand the difference between
being a male and a man. HarperCollins www.harpercollins.com
1997 ISBN 0-06-017308-4 Hardback. See for paperback version
below. Buy
This Book! Buy
This Tape!
Schlessinger, Laura, Ten Stupid
Things Men do to Mess Up Their Lives. HarperCollins www.harpercollins.com
1998 The paperback version. Buy
This Book? Buy
This Tape?
Skyes, Bryan, Adam's
Curse: A future without men. With the publication of
The Seven Daughters of Eve in 2001, the author already one
of the world's preeminent geneticists, established himself as one
of science's most fascinating explicators of the mysterious of
human origins. Now, in this book, he returns with an equally
spellbinding volume that examines the perilous future of the
Y chromosome and the ultimate survival of men. So dire is
this situation, he demonstrates, that the day will come, perhaps
125,000 years from now, when the Y chromosome could literally
cease to exist. As he explains, the lowly Y chromosome, especially
when compared to the body's forty-five other chromosomes, exists
in a fragile state, its durability worn down by mans millions of
years of attrition, over which time it has lost hundreds of genes.
While other chromosomes contain as many as 1,000 different genes,
the Y chromosome, unable to exchange genetic materials or repair
itself, now contains no more than a few hundred genes and the
prospects for a reversal of fortunes are bleck if not nonexistent.
His compellingly shows that this is not the stuff of science
fiction but a reality borne out by genetic research. In this book,
not only does he trace the scientific history of the
Y chromosome, but he also uses this awareness to examine the
huge differences between the male and female sexes - not just the
physical or genetic ones, but also those that result from
psychological, social or even cultural differences. W.W. Norton,
www.wwnorton.com, 2004,
ISBN 0-393-05896-4 
Taylor, Michael, A New Conversatoin
with Men. Join the author, an entrepreneur, author,
motivational speaker and radio-show host as he shares how creating
a new paradigm of masculinity can help heal America. This book is
written to inspire men of all ethnicities, ages, socio-economic
levels and religions to come together to redefine manhood and to
eradicate the multiplicity of challenges facing America today. Its
intention is to remove the separation among men and remove the
hatred, fear and distrust that too many men feel about each other.
It is a powerful, inspirational document written to educate,
motivate and inspire all men to reach their full potential. Join
the conversation and become a part of the revolution! Publish
America, www.PublishAmerica.com,
2008, ISBN 1-60563-580-4
Visit Michael's monthly column here.
Tiger, Lionel, The Decline of Males.
The author offers a unique biological perspective on major
questions of the age that have thwarted sociological, economic and
political explanatoin. Why are one-third of the babies
in the industrialized world born to single mothers? Why
has there been an increase in both legal and illegal abortions -
even though contraception is vastly improved and widely
available? Why are so many men reluctant to support
their families? Why do so many women want to - and have
to - work? Most experts see the cause in social
forces: the rise of feminism, changes in the makeup of the
workforce, or political programs such as workfare. But, according
to the author, the master issue is reproduction, a biological
process. He argues that the most basic cause of these changes is
the spread of effective contraception. Controlled by women, it
gives them the sole power to decide whether or not to bear
children, independent of men's desires and even of their
knowledge. Since the advent of the birth control pill nearly forty
years ago, human society has been under going a dramatic but
little-understood revolution in the fundamrental relationship
between the sexes. The unforeseen and unintended consequences of
efficient contraception are now a major focus of the "gender
wars". Removed from the responsibility to use birth control and
without a way to know for certain that a sexual partner is even
using birth control, men have been marginalized in the process of
reproductoin. They have begun to feel obsolete and out of control.
The result is an unprecedented withdrawal of men from faimly
systems, leading to increased pressures on the government to take
their place - an arrangement the author calls "bureaugamy". The
book provides valuable lessons for parents to teach their sons -
and their daughters - as we enter the twenty-first century. Golden
Books 1999 ISBN 1-58238-014-7 Buy
This Book!
Twitchell, James B., Where Men Hide
with photographs by Ken Ross. If you ask men if they spend any
time hiding, they usually look at you as if you're nuts. "What, me
hide?" But if you ask women whether men hide, they
immediately know what you mean. This book is a spirited tour of
the dark and often dirty places men go to find comfort,
camaraderie, relaxation, and escape. The striking photographs and
lively analysis trace the evolution of these virtual caves and
question why they arae rapidly disappearing. The photographer
documents both traditional and contemporary male haunts - bars,
barbershops, lodges, pool halls, strip clubs, garages, deer camps,
megachurches, the basement Barcalounger - while the author
examines their provenance, purpose and appeal. He finds that for
centuires men have met with one another in underground lairs and
clubhouses to conduct business or, in the case of strip clubs and
the modern rec room, to bond and indulge in shady enterainments.
In these secret dens, certain rules are abandoned, while others
are obeyed. However, he sees this less as exclusionary behavior
and more as the result of social anxiety: when women want to get
together, they just do it; when men get together, it's a
production. By blending anecdote, research and keen observation,
the author and photographer bring this little-discussed and
contoversial phenomenon to light. 2006. Columbia University Press,
www.columbia.edu/cu/cup,
ISBN 0-231-13734-6 
Vilar, Esther, The Manipulated Man: Men have been trained and
conditioned by women, not unlike the way Pavlov conditioned his
dogs, into becoming their slaves. This classic polemic about
the relationship between the sexes caused a sensation on its first
publication in 1972. In her introduction to this revised edition,
Vilar maintains that very little has changed. A man is a human
being who works, while a woman chooses to let a man provide for
her and her children in return for carefully dispensed praise and
sex. Her perceptive, thought-provoking and often very funny look
at the battle between the sexes has earned her sever criticism and
even death threats. But Vilar's intention is not misogynous: she
maintains that only if women and men look at their place in
society with honesty, will there be any hope for change. Pinter
Martin pinter@dircon.co.uk
or www.pinter.dircon.co.uk
1998 May be OOP.
Waldron, Jan, In the Country of Men, My Travels. Part
memoir, part social commentary, this is a thoughtful and
provocative exploration of the meaning of gender, male-female
relationships and manhood. The author's powerful but warm voice
both provokes and seduces as she exposes the folly of gender
shtick while carefully unraveling the intricate stitching of her
life vis-à-vis the men who have contributed to her
definition of manhood: her father, her brother, her lovers, her
sons. She begins with memories of her father, a boy who never
really grew up, and her brother, a boy who had to grow up too
fast. We experience the high drama of her first kiss, and the deep
disappointment of her relationship with the father of her sons,
who left the family when their two boys were four and five. She is
frustrated with men and the trappings of manhood but has finally
found a happy, lasting relationship with a man; and in raising her
sons, she has found hope. Her boys, now sitting on the cusp of
manhood, are the stars of this book. Written with tenderness,
humor and great empathy for males, this is not a manifesto of
absolutes or a male-bashing gripe; it is not aligned with a
movement, nor is it about men as compared with women. She is just
as claustrophobic at a feminist rally as she is at a rowdy men's
sports bar, and teenage boy humor cracks her up. This is a book of
impressions, insights, and stories that speak to everyone, told so
beautifully that everyone will want to listen. An Anchor Book
White, Jerry, Dangers Men
Face: Overcoming the five greatest threats of living
life well. There aren't always clear warning signs for the
dangers men face in life. Hidden traps, unseen pitfalls, and
unmarked detours can catch you unaware and send you sprawling or
running in circles. How do you avoid these traps and continue to
move forward? Five subtle dangers men face and outlined
and the book offers strategies for safely traveling around them.
From the loss of identity sparked by a family or career crises to
the discouraging entrapment of sexual sin, this encouraging
resource will help you recognize these dangers and equip you to
meet and overcome the challenges that lie ahead. Navpress 1997
Buy
This Book!
Wilser, Jeff, The Maxims of Manhood: 100
rules every real man must live by. It used to be easy to be a
man. All you needed was a buzz cut, a six-pack and a basic
knowledge of hemi-engine maintenance. Times have changed. The
world evolved - and the rules never caught up. This is your guide
through the difficult, confusing, often paradoxical world in which
we live. In this book you'll find the fundamental truths of modern
manhood - a code of behavior that leaves your father proud, your
buddies in awe, and your girlfriend (mostly) satisfied. As a real
man, you have to think. You have to read. You have to fight. You
have to own a dog larger than a toaster. www.maximsofmanhood.com,
Adams Media, www.adamsmedia.com,
2009, ISBN 1-60550-661-3 
Wolff, Tobias, Brothers. When men talk
about their brothers, the stories are too ofter regretful and
sometimes bitter: youthful rivalry persisting unabated into later
years, with no end in sight; resentments over the treatment of a
wife, the exploitation of a parent's unequal affection, a loan
gone bad; feuds so old their causes are forgotten, or too painful
to speak of. It is a bitter thing to be divided from your brother.
All that makes for closeness, when it goes wrong, also makes for
suspicion and rancor. I have a brother myself, and I know how
easily things can go wrong. We weren't always as careful as we
should have been. We tried each other, naturally. So it's in
gratitude, not in pride, that I look back and see that between us
things did not go wrong, and that the very moments when our
brotherhood was most in danger have become our redemption
narratives - the grenade that didn't go off, the flood that never
quite reached the rooftop, the terrible crash we walked away from.
This is the story of one of those crashes." And so begins the
author's unforgettable introduction to this compelling, moving
compendium of portraits celebrating the bond between brothers.
Some of these portraits are painted with words, from Larry Doyle's
memories of mischief, to Stephen and Mark O'Donnell's almanac of
experiences as twins, to Scott Raab's unblinking account of his
own violent temper. These brief memoirs, from some of America's
most highly acclaimed writers, take us from Boston to Baltimore to
the African bush. Ultimately, this book confirms the observation
that "The good luck of having a brother is partly the luck of
having stories to tell." Hyperion, 1999. ISBN 0-7868-6520-2
Buy
This Book!You were once wild here. Don't let them tame you! -- Isadora Duncan
I've missed more than 9000 shots in my career. I've lost almost 300 games. 26 times, I've been trusted to take the game winning shot and missed. I've failed over and over and over again in my life. And that is why I succeed. -- Michael Jordan
95+% of American kindergarten teachers, secretaries, registered
nurses and dental assistants are women.
95+% of American firefighters, automobile mechanics, truck drivers
and law enforcement officers who are killed are men.
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