I Know I Love My Wife!
Recently I went to see Chris Rocks new movie I
Think I Love My Wife. The movie is about a guy who
has a beautiful wife, 2 adorable kids a great job
and a nice house. By societies standards he is a
pretty successful guy. On the surface he looks like
he has it all together, but like too many men, he
is unhappy and unfulfilled. Not only is he
unfulfilled; he is absolutely bored to death. He
and his wife are having marital problems, which
results in them not having sex. He has a very sexy
and seductive female friend who is continuously
trying to seduce him which makes matters even
worse. To top it all off he has begun asking the
question that is the precursor to most divorces and
failed relationships, Would I be happier if I
were single again?
Whenever a man gets to this question it is
usually the beginning of the end. Either the
relationship will end or the relationship will have
to change. This question means that there are
unresolved issues that have not been addressed and
the man is preparing himself for either one of two
things,
- He is already considering leaving the
relationship or having an affair.
- He wants to fix it. He is really committed
to the relationship and wants it to work but
does not know how to improve or repair it.
As the movie progresses the man is faced with
some very difficult choices. Ultimately he finds
the answer to his question and then chooses a path
that works best for him. I dont want to give
the plot away but the movie made me start thinking
and asking questions.
For example: Why is it that when we get married
our relationships become more and more difficult?
Why do most people have less sex after they get
married? Why do we even get married in the first
place? Isnt it more fun to be single? Why do
we say were in love, get married and then
fall out of love? And last but not least, how do we
know when we are truly in love? What exactly is
love any way?
These are questions that I have been asking
myself for the past twenty years. And although I do
not claim to have all the answers I have been able
to answer them for myself and as a result I now
have a marriage that really works for me. Although
my marriage may not be perfect, it is perfect in
its imperfection and I will admit that I
absolutely love being married. Ill take the
married life over the single life any day.
So I wanted to take this opportunity and share
Michael Taylors five ways to know if you
really love your wife or spouse or girlfriend.
These are five ways that I confirm that I love my
wife and that I am happily married. Try them out
and see if they work for you.
- If you truly love your wife you can be
completely honest with her about how you really
feel. This means that you can tell her when you
are angry or you can tell her when you are sad
or afraid. If you really do not like those new
shoes she bought you can tactfully be honest and
say you do not like them. You can express your
self openly and honestly when things arent
going well in your life as well as when they are
going well. In other words you can truly
communicate with each other.
- If you truly love your wife whenever
something significant occurs in your life she is
the first person that you want to tell. Whether
its a new promotion or a devastating car
wreck she is the first person that pops into
your mind. You know that you can count on her to
be there for you through thick or thin and you
accept her support in all ways.
- If you truly love your wife even when she
gets on your last nerve and youre mad as
hell you still know that this is the woman that
you want to spend the rest of your life with.
You never think about leaving and you know that
you can work through anything. As the saying
goes, this too shall pass and you
recognize this divine truth. You recognize the
difference between who she is and what she does
and you can be angry temporarily at what she
does, but you are never angry with who she
really is. You understand that relationships are
perfect in their imperfection and you accept her
imperfections as well as your own.
- If you truly love your wife then you commit
to spending quality time with them. This does
not mean that you have to take them out or spend
any money on them. It simply means that you give
them your undivided attention and share in their
interests some times. Its amazing how the
most important relationship in our lives is
often neglected and then we wonder why we end up
in divorce court. If you really love your wife
why wouldnt you want to be with her?
- If you really and truly love your mate you
are never tempted to stray even if the woman who
may be tempting you looks better and has a
better body than your wife. There will always be
someone better looking than your mate. If you
truly love someone it is about more than their
physical beauty it should also be about their
inner beauty and when you connect with that,
your love will truly flourish. True love is more
than just a feeling. It is a commitment and an
action that says that you have dedicated your
life to this person and this person only. Your
commitment is to be faithful. Isnt that
the reason you married her in the first place?
You must realize that a temporary attraction is
OK as long as you do not allow yourself to act
on that momentary attraction. If you really love
your mate then there is no way you could ever
cheat on them because you would be able to feel
the hurt and devastation that betrayal causes
and you would never want your wife to feel that
terrible pain. Some men rationalize (which means
they tell rational lies to themselves) that as
long as they provide for their families
its ok to be unfaithful. The truth is that
they may love their wives on the surface but
they are definitely not in love with them. That
is the distinction that most men really struggle
with.
These are my five keys to knowing if you truly
are in love with your wife. What do you think? Do
you agree or disagree? Drop me an email and let me
hear your comments.
©2009, Michael
Taylor
* * *
Michael
Taylor is a dreamer, revolutionary, an
entrepreneur, author (A New
Conversatoin with
Men), personal
development coach and motivational speaker who has
dedicated his life to empowering men (and women) to
reach their full potential. He does not consider
himself to be an expert or guru. He does consider
himself to be extremely knowledgeable in the field
of personal growth and development. The fact is, he
is an ordinary guy that made a commitment to live
an extraordinary life and he wants to challenge you
to do the same. E-Mail
or www.anewconversationwithmen.com
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