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June
Premature Ejector
sir iwanted to ask that i eject too quickly that u
can say that i feel it impossible for her fulfil
her desire. is it any disese or what
Dear Premature Ejector,
I'm sure you'll find that a large percentage of
your fellow students at Harvard eject too early as
well.
One of the many things about sex that continues
to amaze me is why one guy ejects too soon and the
next guy takes forever to eject. It also amazes me
how one guy's antidote for lasting longer is
another guy's poison, so to speak.
For instance, on our sex survey at
www.goofyfootpress.com, we been askin—excuse
me—we've been asking the males if they use
lube or do it dry when they self-eject. One guy
will answer, "If I've got lots of time, I'll do it
with lube but I don't get as much friction with
lube and it takes me a lot longer to eject." The
next guy will answer, "Dry, because with lube I'm
off in about ten seconds."
We usually think that the guy who prematurely
ejects is more sensitive in his genitals than the
guy who takes forever. While this might be the case
for some, for others the problem is that they
aren't very aware of their body's feelings and
sensations. They go from zero to full ejection
without a prayer of extending or finessing the
situation. The best way to help is to teach them to
be more aware of the feelings in their genitals and
surrounding areas. Unfortunately, this is usually
the last thing they want. Most of their efforts are
to decrease awareness rather than increase it.
(Sorry, but thinking about baseball won't help,
especially if your favorite player got ejected
during the early innings of last night's game.)
For instance, would all male readers please put
one hand in their pants. If you are in public,
please try to be discrete, but clasp your fingers
around your penis nonetheless. (If you are at
Starbucks, tell them you're frothing your latte.)
After you stroke for a bit, think about what you
feel.
While this is no indicator or predictor of
whether you eject too soon or too late, the
premature ejector might have more of a tendency to
describe what his hand is feeling rather than
what's going on inside of his reproductive unit. He
might reply "hard," or "big" if he's an optimist
and "small" if he's a pessimist. On the other hand,
if he says "It tingles" or "It's starting to throb
a little", then his mind is on what's happening on
or in his penis, and this is where he wants to
be.
That's where the answer lies for a lot of
premature ejectors—in becoming more and more
aware of the sensations inside of their bodies.
That way they won't be so overwhelmed or taken off
guard when the first feelings of ejection occur.
They can learn to tolerate greater levels of
sensation and to operate closer to the point of no
return without suddenly tripping over it.
There are some fun ways that a woman can help a
guy with premature ejection if they are both
patient and willing. I've included a fifteen page
chapter on the subject in the Guide To Getting It
On! It's called,"Dyslexia of the Penis--Improving
Your Sexual Hang Time." but I would caution you
about focusing only on the issue of coming to soon.
Maybe this would be a good time to learn more about
sexuality in general, exploring many of its
dimensions with your partner if you have one or
checking it out on your own if you don't.
It might also be a good time for the fellow who
wrote me this email to take an introductory English
class as well. That way he'll be feeding both of
his heads and not just the one down below. Society
at large will benefit rather than just his
girlfriend.
©2007 by Paul
Joannides
Related Issues: Talking
With Kids About Tough Issues, Relationship,
Sexuality
Books: Relationship,
Sexuality
* * *
In America, sex is an obsession, in other parts of
the world it is a fact. - Marlene Dietrich
Paul
Joannides is the author of the Guide
To Getting It On!--the Universe's Coolest and Most
Informative Book On Sex.
You can contact him at www.goofyfootpress.com
by clicking on the cover of the Guide that
appears on his web site. All columns are the
property of Paul Joannides and Goofy Foot
Press
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