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August
Vaginal farts
Dear Readers, What follows is my correspondence
with a reader who asked a simple question. I turn
to you and your experience to help further the
discussion. Please email me your input at
www.goofyfootpress.com (click on the cover of the
Guide, hit the "contact us" button). I'll print
your answers next week.
Dear Paul,
My girlfriend is capable of the most amazing
vaginal farts. Up until 3 months ago, I had only
heard rumors of this phenomonon (check that
spelling!). I read the info on this in your book,
but would love to know more. Any leads?
Windy
Dear Windy,
Thanks for your email regarding your girlfriend
with the acoustical crotch. Could you please
describe the situation a little more for me... for
instance, does it mainly happen during intercourse,
and if so, are there certain positions or times
when it happens?
As for the question of "phonomonon," the
spelling would be "phenomenon." You did, use the
correct singular form "phenomenon," which is better
than myself who often slips up and says
"phenomena."
Paul
Dear Paul,
Holy cow, I never expected such a detailed (and
timely) response, but I am thrilled, partly by your
fascination with grammar. I also try to be
well-versed, but there is something about the
computer that makes you fire first and ask
questions later--sort of like sex!
Anyhow, here is a short history: new girlfriend,
going down on her the first time, and she (while
coming) farts in my face. Vaginally, of course.
Since then, I know for sure if she is coming (or
close too) by the amount of air that is expelled
from her insides. Plus, there is a definite sucking
sound before the farting sound. Only makes sense.
She farts while masturbating, when I manipulate
her, and (especially), when I enter her from
behind. Then, I can pull all the way out, hear a
sucking sound, and control the farting noise as I
enter her. I'm sure she's been making these noises
for as long as she's been playing with herself. She
is not embarrassed (not that she should be) and
some of her expulsions are quite impressive. My
most telling experience was when she was on all
fours, and I was massaging her mons with 2 fingers
inside her. I could feel her insides swell, almost
like a balloon, with lots of space inside, and then
collapse onto my fingers, tight, like a mouth
sucking. The hollow I felt inside her was like
nothing I had ever felt before. She is otherwise
very snug and firm, all around.
Windy
Dear Windy,
Your last three sentences seem to describe the
phenomenon perfectly. I've read speculation that
the sucking is part of an attempt to pull in sperm,
or one of the body's "knock me up now" aids. I'm
sure there are other answers as well. I'm asking
our readers to send in their own experiences with
what you are describing.
©2007 by Paul
Joannides
Related Issues: Talking
With Kids About Tough Issues, Relationship,
Sexuality
Books: Relationship,
Sexuality
* * *
In America, sex is an obsession, in other parts of
the world it is a fact. - Marlene Dietrich
Paul
Joannides is the author of the Guide
To Getting It On!--the Universe's Coolest and Most
Informative Book On Sex.
You can contact him at www.goofyfootpress.com
by clicking on the cover of the Guide that
appears on his web site. All columns are the
property of Paul Joannides and Goofy Foot
Press
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