Talking About Her Boyfriend

Q: What do you do when she talks about her boyfriend? It pisses me off.

A: Let's start with a refresher from How To Date Young Women and the chapter Boyfriends.

When she mentions him early on it means: (1) She's not interested. (2) She's interested, wants you to know the score. (3) She wants to flirt with you and feel serenely indignant when she wins the Rapo game. (Rapo, as in Rape-o is described fully in Court Her.)

If she doesn't say anything about him right away but does later it means: (1) She was kinda interested and didn't want you to fade away. After getting to know you she wants to have an affair if she can keep her boyfriend. (2) She was interested but after getting to know you this is how she says no. (3) She was playing Rapo with you all along, you've made your move, this is how she says, "What kind of girl do you think I am?" (4) She likes you, doesn't want to date you but didn't feel any of her personal life was appropriate until now. It's usually (1) (2) or (3). The first two account for sixty percent.

With that said, use anything she reveals as information to make yourself more appealing. Listen as if she is your friend, because she is. She might be complaining, bragging, or just passing time. It makes no difference. Listen to the words but really hear what she's saying without words. Focus on her arms and hands.

Notice where they are and what she's doing with them. Pay attention to the emotions you're feeling when just watching what she's saying without words.

Remember, courtship is conducted mostly on a nonverbal level. If you do not yet have Body Language Secrets: A Guide During Courtship and Dating get it today!

If she's complaining, use what you're learning to show her how much better off she'd be by having a torrid affair with you in addition to keeping Jimmy. You must be diplomatic and tactful as explained in Planting Seeds.

If she's bragging, be appropriately impressed. You are a gentleman. If she's just passing the time, listen just like she was complaining and use what you learn to make yourself more attractive.

If you're pissed off there are two possibilities. First, she's trying to piss you off. Second, you're jealous and want her to be your girlfriend, not Jimmy's.

Let's say she's trying to piss you off. That means she's strongly interested in you OR IT MEANS she wants you to get away from her. Her body language tells the truth.

If you're jealous and want her to be your girlfriend, there's nothing I can tell you other than to ask you to realize, and then accept, the impossibilities of such a thing UNLESS you are way better than her boyfriend and it is obvious to her across time.

That is why the you must understand a fundamental of mammalian courtship: Beauty chooses! Translation: The more desirable the female, the more Alpha Male you must be.

When you are not what she wants THE END. See How to Date Young Women Volume 2 for an explanation of this FUNDAMENTAL principle of courtship as practiced by mammals. It is also carefully laid out in Body Language Secrets.

Evolution insists that the male be the best from among all the males courting her. Why? It works!

Women do the choosing! This is concept is impossible for "dating experts" on the www to grasp because they cannot get a date! Systems, dictionaries, hypnotism, phone counseling, language patterns, clever opening lines are IMPOTENT. That is not what women want! They want a confident, relaxed Man with The Right Attitude. When he is dressed for success - he is in the potential MR. RIGHT category.

STEEL BALLS PRINCIPLE: To win the heart of Miss Right, first you must be Mr. Right.

©2008 R. Don Steele

Other Relationship Issues, Books


Don Steele has worked for more than 20 aerospace, defense and engineering companies as well as many political campaigns both in LA and in Hawaii. He became a Marriage, Family and Child Counselor in 1976. Beyond writing, other passions include a deep, abiding hatred for hypocrites, bureaucrats, poverty pimps and nearly all politicians; a lifelong devotion to anthropology, philosophy; astronomy and cosmology plus a long-term love affair with Hawaii, consummated in 1996. He and Joanna Bardot Lopez live in Whittier CA, with their number one dog Wolfie, number two dog, Tootsie, Peaches The Rabbit, Puppy Cat, Princess Cat, Snookums Cat and Bebe Cat. Don is the author of Date Young Women:  For men over 35 - Revised, How to Date Young Women:  For men over 35, Volume II, and most recently, Body Language Secrets. Check out steelballsAUDIO.COM and or E-Mail.

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