Break the Pattern of Abusive Women

According to the United States Justice department, over one third of all "reported" cases of domestic violence involve a violent woman as the perpetrator. And, because of the stigma for a man reporting “his woman" beats him, the number is probably much higher.

Men who get involved with abusive women are typically those who had abusive childhood home environments. This kind of upbringing tends to normalize abusive behavior in all relationships. What this means is that men from this kind of a background are not as keen to the subtleties of abuse the way “healthy” men are.

On a positive note, there is a silver lining here—all behavior can be relearned, including the ability to recognize early signs of abuse as unacceptable behaviors in a relationship. Once this is learned, a man will be able to break free from unhealthy relationships with women who are no good for you.

Below is a list of common abusive behaviors to watch for:

  • Criticism about your good qualities;
  • Past abusive relationships;
  • Criminal activities;
  • Drinking or drug problems, past or present;
  • Mood swings;
  • Discourages your successes;
  • Jealousy;
  • Abusive family members or spouses of siblings;
  • Attempts to control your whereabouts;
  • Disrespect toward your publicly or privately;
  • Violations of others rights;
  • Irresponsibility;
  • Attempts to keep you isolated;
  • Persistent lying;
  • History of truancy, delinquency and running away;
  • Highly reactive;
  • Streaks of meanness toward others for no reason;
  • Threatened by relationships with ex’s—past, present or imagined.
  • In order to recognize early abusive signs, you must stop rationalizing “abusive” behaviors as “normal.” If you see ONE abusive behavior, regardless of how small, you needs to remind yourself that it IS abuse. Period! With this new skill, you will soon be dating women who treat you with dignity and respect—the way you deserve to be treated.

© 2009,

Other Relationship Issues, Books

Nancy Fagan is the best-selling author of 'The Complete Idiot's Guide to Romance' and 'Desirable Men: How to Find Them' has appeared on several hundred radio and television shows including Ricki Lake, Men are from Mars/Women are from Venus, ABC News, NBC News, CBS News, The Berman & Berman Show, FOX News. She has been featured in most major newspaper in the United States and worldwide as well as regularly mentioned in the nation's top magazines such as Ladies' Home Journal ('Can this Marriage be Saved?'), Cosmopolitan, Glamour, Men's Health, Bride's, Seventeen, Women's Day, Family Circle, Women's Own, BBW, Complete Women and dozens of others. To read more, visit This column is reprinted with permission from E-Mail Send questions to E-Mail

Contact Us | Disclaimer | Privacy Statement
Menstuff® Directory
Menstuff® is a registered trademark of Gordon Clay
©1996-2019, Gordon Clay