Warren Farrell, Ph.D., is
the author of numerous international best-sellers
on men and women, including Why
Men Are The Way They Are and The
Myth of Male Power. Women
Can't Hear What Men Don't Say was a
Book-of-the-Month Club selection and Father
and Child Reunion has led to Dr. Farrell
doing expert witness work that has encouraged many
judges to keep dads in childrens lives. Dr.
Farrells released Why
Men Earn More: The Startling Truth Behind the Pay
Gap and What Women Can Do About It in
2005 and Does
Feminism Discriminate Against
Men? A debate in 2008.
Warren is the only man in the US ever elected
three times to the Board of Directors of the
National Organization for Women (NOW) in New York
City. He has been chosen by The Financial
Times as one of the worlds top 100
thought leaders, is in Whos Who in America
and in Whos Who in the World. He has taught
in five disciplines, most recently at the School of
Medicine at the University of California in San
Diego, and is ranked by the International
Biographic Centre of London as one of the
worlds top 2000 scholars of the Twentieth
Century. He has appeared on over 1,000 TV shows
worldwide and lives in Mill Valley, California with
his wife and two daughters. You can visit him at
www.warrenfarrell.com
or E-Mail.
58:46
Does
Feminism Discriminate Against
Men? A debate Excerpts
Introduction
Ch.
1, Do We Need Mens Studies...History
Is Mens Studies,
Right?
Ch.
2, Do Men Have the
Power?
Ch.
3, What the All-Male Draft and the Combat
Exclusion of Women Tell Us About Men, Women and
Feminism
Ch.
4, Why Do Men Die Sooner and Whose Health is
Being
Neglected?
Ch.
5 Domestic Violence: Who is Doing the Battering
and Whats the
Solution?
Ch.
6) The Politics and Psychology of Rape, Sex, and
Love
Ch.
7) Does the Criminal Justice System Discriminate
Against
Men?
Ch.
8) Why Men Earn More
Discrimination? Choices?
Cross-Examining
Warren Farrell on Why Men Earn
More
Do
Women Belong in Combat? Part
I
Do
Women Belong in Combat? Part II: Why Hazardous Jobs
Can Be So Much Less Hazardous for
Women
Do
Women Earn More for the Same
Work?
11
Top Tips on How Women Can Earn
More
Guns
don't kill people...Our sons
do
How
I Began the Discovery that Men Earn Less than Women
for the Same
Work
How
the Assumptions of Discrimination against Women
Backfire against
Women
Introducing
Mens Issues and Why Men Earn
More
Is
Pay Equity Ready to Enter a New
Era?
Three
Judicial Biases About Moms, Dads and
Children
Why
Men Earn More: The Startling Truth Behind the Pay
Gap
Why
Pay is about Giving Up Power to Get the Power of
Pay
Introduction
Excerpts from Does
Feminism Discriminate Against
Men? A debate by Warren Farrell
Everyones life experiences create biases
to which they are usually blind (they see them only
as their life experience). I would like to share
mine up front...
Although I am critiquing the feminist analysis
of men and what I perceive to be feminist
dependency on victim power, my
background is as a feminist, and I support the
portions of feminism that strive to create new
options for women. Because I feel the underlying
biology of men and women is to adapt, I see the
future as an opportunity to develop more flexible
roles than the past allowed. I feel that the
male-female roles that were functional for the
species for millions of years have become
dysfunctional in an evolutionary instant. I
feel that traditional men and women are incomplete
psychologically. In these respects, I differ from
most conservatives.
Without feminism, fewer companies would have
experimented with part-time workers, flexible
schedules, childcare options, and improved safety
standards. Without women in police work, few police
forces would have discovered that 95% of conflicts
are not resolved by physical strength; without
women doctors, few hospitals would be cutting back
90-hour work weeks for doctors; without women
therapists, short-term counseling and couple
counseling would be much less available.... The
feminist movement has allowed thousands of
workplace assumptions to be re-examined; feminism
brought into the workplace not only females, but
female energy.
When I see girls playing baseball, my eyes well
up with tears of happiness (Farrell is Irish!) for
what I know they are learning about teamwork.
Without the feminist movement, those girls would be
on the sidelines. Without the feminist movement,
millions of girls would see only one dimension of
their mothers and, therefore, of themselves. They
would have to marry more for money than for love.
They would be even more fearful of aging.
My background as a feminist includes serving
three years on the Board of the National
Organization for Women in New York City, starting
hundreds of men and womens groups, and
speaking around the world from this perspective
during the 70s and 80s. In
the process, I put tens of thousands of men through
mens beauty contests to give them
an emotional experience of what it was like to be
viewed as a sex object.
Let me share with you first some of the personal
reasons I was so receptive to feminism, and then
some of what led me to balancing that with equal
empathy for men.
Growing up (in the fifties and sixties), I had
seen my mother move in and out of depression. Into
depression when she was not working, out of
depression when she was working. The jobs were just
temporary, but, she would tell me, I
dont have to ask Dad for every penny when
Im working. At forty-eight her
depression and a dizzy spell led to a fall that led
to her death.
My mother died before the current feminist
movement was born, but she would often say, "I'm
your mother, not your slave." I can recall coming
home after being elected seventh-grade class
president, proudly announcing it to her, and
saying, "Our class meetings are on Fridays... could
I have an ironed shirt when I have to preside in
front of the class?" She said "sure" and without
missing a beat, took out the ironing board and
showed me how to iron my shirts.
Whether for these reasons or others, when the
womens movement surfaced, it made sense to me
in an instant. I found myself at the homes of
emerging feminist friends in Manhattan, plopped in
front of their husbands with instructions to
tell him what you told me. Soon I was
involved with the National Organization for Women,
formed mens groups, gave up my position as an
assistant to the president of NYU, wrote a book
called The Liberated Man on the value of
womens independence to men, and began
speaking around the world on these issues.
Some years later, though, another family
experience was to open my eyes differently. My
brother Wayne, twelve years my junior, and his
woman friend went cross-country skiing in the Grand
Tetons. They came to a dangerous pass. It was
April, and they both feared the avalanches. Two of
them going forward would put them both in danger,
yet would give each the opportunity to save the
other. Wayne went forward alone. The snow slipped
from the mountain, gathered momentum and tumbled
its thousands of frozen pounds over my brother.
Burying him 40 feet under. He would have been
twenty-one.
Wayne and his woman friend had unconsciously
agreed that it was his life that would be risked
and in this case sacrificed as he and
she both played out their roles. I would soon see
much more evidence of how deeply ingrained it is
both for women to unconsciously expect mens
protection (even when it means the man sacrificing
his life), and for men to compete to give it in
exchange for approval, respect and love.
The experience with Wayne catalyzed my thinking
about male vulnerability. In my presentations,
rather than just having men walk a mile in
the beauty contest of everyday life that
women experience, I asked women to experience male
vulnerability by asking men out on a role
reversal date, and risking just a few of the
150 or so risks of rejection that men might
experience between eye contact and intercourse.
Risking rejection male-style opened up
womens eyes to male vulnerability and opened
up mens mouths about their feelings.
Especially mens feelings of powerlessness
that evolve from his sexual desirewhether
hes in college or single again
after a divorce. For example, a man who talks about
the compulsive sexual feelings he has is being
vulnerable exactly because he is revealing his
compulsiveness. This makes the woman hed like
to feel closer to feel less special, and more
distant from himand therefore makes him
vulnerable to losing her love.
I began to see mens vulnerability in other
ways. After divorce, a man is ten times as
likely to commit suicide as is the woman. Why?
Women are more likely to have the children --
someone to love them and need them. People who feel
loved and needed rarely commit suicide.
And women develop support systems.
Womens traditional support systems support
women to be vulnerable; mens traditional
support systems support men to be invulnerable.
This creates a paradox: the support men get to
be invulnerable makes them more vulnerable; the
support women get to be vulnerable makes them less
vulnerable. It is just one example of how
womens strength is their façade of
weakness and mens weakness is their
façade of strength.
Take, for example, the most archetypal of
mens support systems -- the cheerleader, his
football team, and his family. When a cheerleader
says, first and ten, do it again! she
isnt saying first get in touch with
your feelings again." Nor is his coach. Nor are his
parents cheering in the stands. All of us are
unwittingly supporting him to risk a
concussion again. His motto is, When
the going gets tough, the tough get going
(they dont cry to the school therapist). If,
instead of getting a touchdown, he gets in touch
with his feelings, and quits his position on the
team to avoid the concussion, the cheerleader
doesnt say, Next week Im going to
cheer for you -- I noticed how open and vulnerable
you were when you were playing football." Yes, next
week she does cheer. But she cheers for his
replaceable part.
Expressing feelings of vulnerability brings
women affection and men rejection.
Ch. 1) Do We Need
Mens Studies...History Is Mens Studies,
Right?
Excerpts from Does
Feminism Discriminate Against
Men? A debate by Warren Farrell
Feminists call it sexism to refer to God
as He; they dont call it sexism to refer to
the Devil as He. Warren Farrell
Womens studies courses are the seeds from
which the forest of feminism has grown. Over 30,000
courses are offered at American universities,
including about 700 majors or minors. A study at 55
major universities found that every Ivy League
school, with the exception of Princeton, now
offers more courses in womens studies than
economics, even though economics majors outnumber
womens studies majors by roughly
10-to-1.
In contrast, there are virtually no mens
studies courses. The few courses labeled
mens studies are rarely genuine
mens studies, but feminist mens
studies. Feminist mens studies courses
tell men how they can forfeit power, be less
abusive toward women, share the housework... In
feminist mens studies, when men have a
disadvantage it is seen as mens fault.
Whether that disadvantage is dying sooner;
committing suicide more; doing worse in almost
everything in school; being less likely to attend
college; paying for children they can see only as
visitors after divorce; being more
likely to be in prison; male-only draft
registration; dying sooner of nine of the ten
leading causes of death; suffering 94% of workplace
deaths; being more of the street homeless than
women and children combined. That is, in feminist
studies, womens disadvantages are often seen
as mens fault; and in feminist mens
studies, mens disadvantages are seen as
mens fault.
Many womens studies departments have
become gender studies departments, but also
only in theory. The male perspective is not dealt
withonly the feminist perspective on men.
Feminists teaching the mens perspective on
men and calling it gender studies is like
Republicans teaching Democrats perspective on
Democrats and calling it party politics. Just as it
is true that no has less empathy for Democrats than
Republican activists (or vice versa), so it is also
true that no one has less empathy for men than
feminist activists. Feminists call it sexism to
refer to God as He; they dont call it sexism
to refer to the Devil as He.
Womens studies in its current form is not
womens studiesit is feminist studies. A
genuine womens studies would involve the
views of not just liberal women, but also of
conservative women (e.g., Independent Womens
Forum; Eagle Forum). Every study of gender should
include four perspectives: those of both liberal
and conservative women, and those of both liberal
and conservative men. Gender studies now studies
only liberal womens view of womens
powerlessness, and liberal womens perspective
on male power. It doesnt look at liberal or
conservative mens view of male powerlessness,
or liberal or conservative mens view of
female power.
What, pray tell, is female power and male
powerlessness? For starters, from the male
perspective, many women have male-paralyzing beauty
power, sexual power, verbal skills and victim
power, even as he is paralyzed by his biological
instinct to protect women.
As a result of the inattention to male
powerlessness and female power, men are as ignorant
about their own powerlessness and female power as
women in the
1950s were about their own powerlessness
and male power. And as a result, men today are
psychologically about where women were in the
1950s. The last half century has not been
a battle of the sexes, but a war in which only one
side has shown up. Men have put their heads in the
sand and hoped the bullets would miss. The less
sense this makes now, the more you need genuine
mens studies.
The feminist objection to genuine mens
studies sounds convincing: history is
mens studies. Wrong. History is the
opposite of mens studies: history books
reinforce the traditional male role of
performer. The function of both women and
mens studies is to question traditional
roles, not reinforce them. Women had to question
the assumption that they must do the child-raising
and couldnt do the money raising. Men need to
question the assumption that they must do the money
raising and cant do the child-raising.
Womens studies is necessary to help women
see clear alternatives to traditional roles;
mens studies is necessary to help men see
clear alternatives to traditional roles. Mens
studies is currently needed more than womens
studies exactly because mens role has been
less-questioned.
History books, by celebrating men only when they
perform, trap men into stereotyped roles even more
than they trap women, because when we celebrate and
appreciate someone for playing a role, we are
really bribing them to keep playing that role.
Appreciation keeps the slave a slave..
Mens studies is not for men only. It would
help both sexes understand dad: why dads are so
often afraid to express feelings; why, when dad
becomes 85, he is more than 13 times as likely to
commit suicide as mom; why he is more likely to
suffer from problems with alcoholism and gambling;
why, after divorce, he often feels the children
have been turned against him and the courts have
turned him into a wallet.
Because half of the childrens genes is
their dads genes, as mens studies helps
students understand their dad, it helps them to
understand the half of themselves that is their
dad. Mens studies, therefore, does not
merely change the students relationship to
her or his dad, but the students relationship
to her or himself. The corollary is that when
womens studies portrays men as the dominant
oppressors, and the abusers, molesters and rapists,
it leaves women and men feeling shamed about the
half of themselves that is their dad-- and, for
men, the 100% that is male.
Mens studies helps every future mom raise
her son more effectively, and to raise her daughter
to learn empathy toward men. Her daughters
empathy is eventually extended toward that
daughters sons. In contrast, a womens
studies-only approach toward men leaves her
daughter with antipathy toward men that can become
antipathy toward her sons.
Mens studies helps both sexes understand
all the problems men deal with as a result of a
heritage that made men able to be loved and
respected only if they were able to kill animals,
kill in war, or make a killing on Wall Street. It
helps both sexes understand all the problems that I
discuss throughout this book. Without mens
studies, gender studies misunderstands not just
gender but also women, in the same way that if
party politics studied only one party, it would
misunderstand not just party politics as a whole,
but also the party it favors.
Mens studies is not the opposite of
womens studies. It doesnt say women had
rights and men didnt. It explains that none
of our grandparents had rightsthey had
responsibilities. They had obligations. Making
money was about not about male power and privilege,
but about male obligations and responsibilities.
Men who fulfilled their responsibilities most
effectively received female love. Men who failed
received female contempt.
Mens studies does not say women have the
power and women oppress men. It helps us understand
that neither sex had the right to play the role of
the other sex, and therefore, if power is control
over our lives, neither sex had power. For example,
most dads prior to the early 20th Century had to
forfeit any fantasy of becoming a writer, artist or
musician to get paid enough to feed a family of
ten. Working as a coal miner was not power. Pay was
about the power dad forfeited to get the power of
paythe power to have his children live a
better life than his. Mens studies helps both
sexes understand why, instead of power, both sexes
had roles. And to understand that by definition a
role cannot be poweragain, because real power
is control over ones own life. Instead, a
role implies outside forces have control of
ones life.
Mens studies explains why, in the past,
the dominant force was neither men nor women, but
the need to survive. And why the
oppressor was neither men nor women,
but the fear of starvation.
If close to a half century of womens
studies without mens studies had only given
us an understanding of women while neglecting men,
the problem would be easily solvable: create
balance with a half century of mens studies
without womens studies. But after a half
century, feminism is part of our nations
consciousness like syrup in a pancake: even if it
we attempted removal, the pancake is forever
reshaped. For example, who doesnt believe
that men earn more money for the same work, or that
men batter women more than women batter men, or
that women do two jobs while men do one? These
beliefs have created a deep-seated anger toward men
and have resulted in policies like affirmative
action extended to women, and women-only
scholarships. Of course, if these beliefs were
true, anger would be warranted. In this colume,
Ill explain why none of the above is
true.
Ch. 2, Do Men Have the
Power?
Excerpts from Does
Feminism Discriminate Against
Men? A debate by Warren Farrell
"The weakness of men is their facade of
strength; the strength of women is their facade of
weakness."
There are many ways in which a woman experiences
a greater sense of powerlessness than her male
counterpart: the fears of aging, rape, date rape;
less physical strength and therefore the fear of
being physically overpowered; less socialization to
take a career that pays enough to support a husband
and children, and therefore the fear of economic
dependency or poverty; less exposure to team
sportsespecially pick-up team sports-- and
its blend of competitiveness and cooperation that
is so helpful to career preparation; greater
parental pressure to marry and interrupt career for
children without regard for her own wishes; not
being part of an "old boys" network; having less
freedom to walk into a bar without being
bothered....
Men have a different experience of
powerlessness. Men who have seen marriage become
alimony payments, their home become their wife's
home, and their children become child support
payments for children who have been turned against
them psychologically, feel like they are spending
their life working for people who hate them. They
feel desperate for someone to love but fear that
another marriage might ultimately leave them with
another mortgage payment, another set of children
turned against them, and a deeper desperation. When
they are called "commitment-phobic" they don't feel
understood.
When men try to keep up with payments by working
overtime and are told they are insensitive, or try
to handle the stress by drinking and are told they
are drunkards, they don't feel powerful, but
powerless. When they fear a cry for help will be
met with "stop whining," or that a plea to be heard
will be met with "yes, buts," they skip past
attempting suicide as a cry for help, and just
commit suicide. Thus men have remained the silent
sex and increasingly become the suicide sex.
Fortunately, almost all industrialized nations
have acknowledged the female experiences.
Unfortunately, they have acknowledged only the
female experiences--and concluded that women have
problems, and men are the problem.
Industrialization did a better job of creating
better homes and gardens for women than it did to
create safer coal-mines and construction sites for
men. How?
Industrialization pulled men away from the farm
and family and into the factory, alienating
millions of men from their source of love.
Simultaneously, it allowed women to have more
conveniences to handle fewer children, and
therefore be increasingly connected to their
sources of love. For women, industrialization meant
more control over whether or not to have children,
less likelihood of dying in childbirth, and less
likelihood of dying from almost all diseases. It
was this combination that led to women living
almost 50% longer in 1990 than in 1920. And it was
this combination that allowed women to go from
living only one year longer than men in 1920 to
living more than five years longer than men in
2005.
What we have come to call male power,
thenmen at the helm of industrialization--
actually produced female power. It literally gave
women a longer life than men.
While the male role in industrialization
expanded womens options, it retained
mens obligations. For example, men voted for
women to share the option to vote. But when both
sexes could vote, they still obligated only men to
register for the draft.
We are at a unique moment in history -- when a
womans body is affected, we say the choice is
hers; but when a boys body is affected, we
say the choice is not his -- the law requires only
our 18 year old sons to register for the draft, and
therefore potential death-if-needed.
"A Woman's Body, A Woman's Choice" vs.
A Man's Gotta Do What A Man's Gotta
Do
Even as women were touting equality in the
1980s and 1990s, in post offices
throughout the United States, Selective Service
posters reminded boys of what is still true
today--that only boys must register for the
draftthat only A Mans Gotta Do
What A Mans Gotta Do.
If the Post Office had a poster saying "A Jew's
Gotta Do What A Jew's Gotta Do".... Or if "A
Woman's Gotta Do..." were written across the body
of a pregnant woman....
The question is this: How is it that if any
other group were singled out to register for the
draft based merely on its characteristics at
birth--be that group blacks, Jews, women, or
gays--we would immediately recognize it as
genocide, but when men are singled out based on
their sex at birth, men call it power?
The single biggest barrier to getting men to
look within is that what any other group would call
powerlessness, men have been taught to call power.
We don't call "male-killing" sexism; we call it
"glory." We don't call the one million men who were
killed or maimed in one battle in World War I (the
Battle of the Somme) a holocaust, we call it
"serving the country." We don't call those who
selected only men to die "murderers." We call them
"voters."
Our slogan for women is "A Woman's Body, A
Woman's Choice"; our slogan for men is "A Man's
Gotta Do What A Man's Gotta Do."
I am unaware of a single feminist demonstration
protesting this inequalityor any other
inequality that benefits only women at the expense
of men.
The Power Of Life
We acknowledge that blacks dying six years
sooner than whites reflects the powerlessness of
blacks in American society. Yet men dying in excess
of five years sooner than women is rarely seen as a
reflection of the powerlessness of men in American
society.
Is the five-year gap biological? If it is, it
wouldn't have been just a one-year gap in 1920. (In
many pre-industrialized countries there is only a
small male-female life expectancy gap, and in their
more rural areas men sometimes live longer.)
If men lived more than five years longer than
women, feminists would be helping us understand
that life expectancy was the best measure of who
has the power. And they would be right. Power is
the ability to control one's life. Death tends to
reduce control. Life expectancy is the bottom
line--the ratio of our life's stresses to our
life's rewards.
If power means having control over one's own
life, then perhaps there is no better ranking of
the impact of sex roles and racism on power over
our lives than life expectancy. Here is the
ranking:
Life Expectancy
As A Way Of Seeing Who Has The Power
Females (White) 80.5
Females (Black) 76.1
Males (White) 75.3
Males (Black) 69.0
The white female outlives the black male by more
than 11 years. Imagine the support for affirmative
action if a 49-year-old woman was closer to death
than a 60-year-old man.
I am unaware of a single feminist demonstration
protesting this inequality.
Suicide As Powerlessness
Just as life expectancy is one of the best
indicators of power, suicide is one of the best
indicators of powerlessness.
Item.
- From ages 9 to 14, boys' rate of suicide is
three times as high as girls';
- from 15 to 19, four times as high; and
- from 20 to 24, almost six times as
high.
Item. As boys experience the pressures
of the male role, their suicide rate increases
25,000%.
Item. The suicide rate for men over 85 is
1350% higher than for women of the same age
group.
The Clearest Sign Of Powerlessness
Subjection of a group of people to violence
based on their membership in that group is a clear
indicator of that group's powerlessness, be it
Christians to lions or the underclass to war. If a
society supports violence against that group by its
laws, customs or socialization, it oppresses that
group.
In the United States, women are exposed to
greater violence in the form of rape. And therefore
rape is punished by law, and opposed by religion,
custom, socialization and virtually 100% of men and
women.
In contrast, mens exposure to violence is
required by law (the draft), supported by religion
and custom (circumcision), by socialization,
scholarship incentive, and the education system
(telling men who are best at bashing their heads
against 11 other men that they have "scholarship
potential"), via approval and love of
beautiful women (cheerleaders cheering for men to
do it again-- to again risk
concussions, spinal chord injuries, etc.), via
parental approval and love (the parents who attend
the Thanksgiving games at which their sons are
battering each other), via taxpayer money (high
school wrestling and football, ROTC, and the
military), and via our entertainment dollar
(boxing, football, ice hockey, rodeos, car racing,
westerns, war movies...). After we subject only our
sons to this violence (before the age of consent),
we blame them for growing into the more violent
sex.
But here's the rub. When other groups are
subjected to violence, we acknowledge their
powerlessness. Men learn to associate violence
against them with love, respect and power. Instead
of helping men who are subjected to violence, we
bribe men to accept it by giving them money to
entertain us by risking death.
This is deeply ingrained. Virtually every
society that has survived has done so via its
ability to prepare its men to be disposableto
call it glory to be disposable in war,
and eligible for marriage to be disposable at
work.
Ch. 3, What the All-Male Draft
and the Combat Exclusion of Women Tell Us About
Men, Women and Feminism
Excerpts from Does
Feminism Discriminate Against
Men? A debate by Warren Farrell
"Every society rests on the death of
men."--Oliver Wendell Holmes
Item. Almost one out of four American men is a
veteran.[i]
Item. In one World War I battle alone (the
Battle of the Somme), over one million men were
killed or maimed.[ii]
Understanding men requires understanding men's
relationship to the Three Ws: Women, Work, and War.
As we just saw in the Section on Power, only
18-year-old boys are legally required to register
for future wars. How realistic is it that the boys
will, in fact, be drafted? We know only that in 24
to 72 hours the first induction orders can be in
the mail.[iii] Should
another 9/11 happen tomorrow, that's how fast your
life or your brothers or boyfriends
life could change. As I write this, National Guard
and Reserve units practice each week setting up the
infrastructure to allow 100,000 men to be trained
for potential death in boot camps in four
weeks.[iv] This
efficiency is made possible by the pre-registration
system.
If a boy refuses to register for the draft when
he turns 18, he can be barred from all federal
jobs--from the US Post Office to the FBI.[v]
He faces a fine of up to $250,000 and five years in
prison.[vi] Once in
prison, a young man's nubile, young body combined
with his reputation for not fighting makes him a
perfect candidate for homosexual rape and,
therefore, AIDS. In brief, he is subject to being
killed. Why? He was too sensitive to kill.
The Multi-Option Woman And The No-Option
Man
In many states, an 18-year-old boy who has not
registered for the draft cannot attend a state
school.[vii] He cannot
receive even a loan for a private school.
Male-only draft registration leaves a woman who
doesn't register for the draft able to:
(1) go to a state school;
(2) go to a private school with federal aid;
or
(3) get married and work; be single and work;
have children...
It leaves a man who doesn't register able
to:
(1) go to jail;
(2) go to jail;
(3) go to jail.
Male obligation vs. Female
entitlement
Before boys and men can vote, they have the
obligation to protect that right with the risk of
their life; women receive the right to vote without
the obligation to protect that right with the risk
of anything. Only women receive the privileges
of freedom without a single obligation. This
male-female legal gap creates a male-female
psychological gapa gap between male
obligation and female entitlement.
I say male obligation vs.
female entitlement because, even if one
believes that women should not be in combat (for
whatever reason), there are dozens of other
obligations that women could be required to
register for at age 18administrative roles,
technical support, medical support, factory
support. But nothing is required of women. And
everyone takes that for granted. Thats
entitlement.
How the Law Affects Men vs. Womens
Moral Maturity
More important, when registering to be a
potential killer is a legal requirement for only
boys, that frees a woman from moral dilemmas,
allowing her to see herself and other women as more
innocent and moral than the young man she sits next
to in class. (Hence, we decry the
innocent women and children killed in
war.)
The magnitude of the moral dilemma is greatest
at two points in history: when going to war is
likely; when our country is engaged in a war the
boy considers immoral. Then, every boy must face
the moral dilemma of registering to be drafted to
potentially lose his life and kill others for
something he may consider immoral. For many boys,
even if they are in college and think they will
never be drafted, the likelihood that their college
teachers and peers will consider a war like the War
in Iraq immoral and illegal, makes registering for
it an ethical dilemma. No matter what their level
of developmental readiness, only boys are forced to
lose their innocence as a rite of passage to
adulthood.
My Body, My Business?
For women, it's "our bodies, our business"; for
men, it's "our bodies, government business." For
men, G.I. means government issue. A womans
body is a womans issue; a mans body is
the governments issue.
Registering all of our 18-year-old males for the
draft in the event the country needs more soldiers
is as sexist as registering all of our 18-year-old
females for child-bearing by force in the event the
country needs more children.
Why Should Women Fight in the Wars Men
Cause?
Some feminists say that men cause wars, so
its only right men should fight. This is like
saying, women raise children, so its only
right women should go to prison for the crimes
committed by children. Parentsnot women-- are
ultimately responsible for raising children, and
voters of both sexes are ultimately responsible for
their laws and their leaders. And in the U.S.,
seven million more female voters than male voters
elect the politicians who create the policies that
make or prevent war.
Arent there more male politicians, though?
Yes. Politicians are like chauffeurstheir
bodies are in the drivers seat; voters are
like the owners in the back seat telling the
chauffeur where to go. The politician and chauffeur
have some discretion as to how to get there, but
the voters-- or owners in the back seatare
the ones who must take responsibility for the
chauffeurs and politicians they hire, and where
they tell them to go.
On the deepest levels, wars are not caused by
men, and oppression is not created only by men.
Rent An Officer and a Gentleman. When I saw
An Officer and a Gentleman in a theater when
it first opened, the women cheered wildly when the
female heroine got the officer who had learned how
to kill, not the pacifist who refused to kill. As
long as women choose the killer genes, they will
create children from the genes of killers, not from
the genes of pacifists. And if women did not choose
those genes, there would be no war from which
Europeans would live in America. And if American
women only started choosing pacifist mens
genes in 1900, they would now be Nazis speaking
German. Similarly, if women cared about Blacks not
being oppressed, no woman would be wearing a
diamond mined by companies supporting Apartheid.
Women who are adult enough to take responsibility
for their choices will acknowledge their role in
both war and oppression.
[i]See US Department of
Commerce, Bureau of the Census, Statistical
Abstract of United States: 2006, 126th edition, p.
346, Table 509; p. 344, Table 505; and p. 13, Table
11.
[ii]See John Laffin,
Brassey's Battles: 3500 Years of Conflict,
Campaigns, and Wars from A-Z (London: A. Wheaton
& Co., 1986), p. 399.
[iii]Air Force Lt. Col.
Ronald Meilstrup, Deputy Director of the Selective
Service System's Regional Headquarters in
Illinois.
[iv]Bob Secter, "The
Draft: If There's a War, There's a Way," Los
Angeles Times, January 3, 1991, p. E-1 &
E-5.
[v]Military Selective
Service Act. See "Privacy Act Statement," SSS Form
1, Registration Form, September, 1987.
[vi]Military Selective
Service Act. See "Privacy Act Statement," SSS Form
1, Registration Form, September, 1987.
[vii]Jim Schwartz,
College Press Service, 1986.
© 2010, Warren
Farrell (with Steven Svoboda) vs. James P.
Sterba
Ch. 4, Why Do Men Die Sooner
and Whose Health is Being Neglected?
Excerpts from Does
Feminism Discriminate Against
Men? A debate by Warren Farrell
Myth: Women just naturally live longer
than men.
Fact: In 1920, American men died only one
year sooner than women; [i]
now the life expectancy gap is 5.3 years (75.8
years for men; 80.1 for women).[ii]
Myth: The government neglects
womens health research. Evidence:
Womens health research receives only 10% of
all health research funding by the National
Institutes of Health. [iii]
Fact: Mens health research receives
only 5% of all health research funding by the
National Institutes of Health. [iv]
(The other 85% is for non gender-specific research,
such as cellular, blood, DNA, etc.). For example, a
man is slightly more likely to die of prostate
cancer as is a woman to die of breast
cancer.[v] Yet the
government spends almost two times as much money on
breast cancer as it does on prostate
cancer.[vi]
Myth: More of the serious, published
research is done on men than on women.
Fact: In the 10 years prior to mid-2023,
gender-specific systematic reviews were published
on women three and a half times more than on
men.[vii] In the same
period, the number of randomized controlled trials
(the highest quality research) using only women is
nearly twice as large as that for men.[viii]
Since as far back as major computer searches can
access complete records (1965) most gender-specific
research pertains to women. (For the four 10-year
periods beginning in 1965, bibliographic searches
find 16%, 13%, 18%, and 30% more gender-specific
research was published on women.[ix])
* * *
In certain areas womens health research
was neglected. We were led to believe that is
because we didnt care about women. The
opposite was true. Men, and especially male
prisoners, military men and African-American men,
were the most likely to be the guinea pigs for the
testing of new drugs because we cared less if men
and prisoners died. That is, we used men for
experimental research for the same reason we use
rats for experimental research.
While dozens of studies are being done on the
possible damage of silicone breast implants, the
causes of men dying 5.3 years sooner are virtually
ignored. Nor are most of us aware of how quickly
mens health is deteriorating. In 1993, the
gap between male and female suicide was 3.9 to 1;
now it is 4.1 to 1 (see table).[x]
In Great Britain, there is a recent 339% increase
in male suicides by hanging alone.[xi]
Even as we are increasingly hearing that women
die of heart disease as often as men, we are not
hearing that when most women die of heart disease,
men have been long dead. Here are the age-adjusted
death rates for the ten leading causes of
death[xii]
|
Male to Female
Ratio
|
1. Diseases of heart
|
1.5 to 1
|
2. Malignant neoplasms
|
1.5 to 1
|
3. Cerebrovascular diseases
|
1.02 to 1
|
4. Chronic lower respiratory
diseases
|
1.4 to 1
|
5. Accidents
|
2.2 to 1
|
6. Diabetes mellitus
|
1.2 to 1
|
7. Influenza and pneumonia
|
1.4 to 1
|
8. Alzheimers disease
|
0.8 to 1
|
9. Nephritis, nephrotic syndrome and
nephosis
|
1.5 to 1
|
10. Septicimia
|
1.2 to 1
|
Centers for Disease Control and
Prevention, National Vital Statistics
Report, Volume 54, No. 10, January 2006,
Table 17, pp. 69-76, www.cdc.gov/nchs/data/nvsr/nvsr53/nvsr53_05acc.pdf.
|
Not all of the significant causes of death are
neglected. Fortunately, people feared AIDS would
affect heterosexuals, and affect women equally to
men, and its funding increased. We pay attention to
chlamydia, gonorrhea, and syphilis because we
believe women are more at risk than menbut in
fact, men are more at risk.[xiii]
With suicide, most people know it is predominantly
a mans method of disposability, so it is the
only leading cause of death that is also
neglected.
Here is my list of at least 34 neglected areas
of mens health exist:
Neglected Areas of Men's
Health
1. a men's birth control pill (There is 14 times
as much published research on female than male
contraception in the last 10 years despite the need
and scientific viability for a male pill.)[xiv]
2. suicide
3. PTSD (post-traumatic stress syndrome)
4. circumcision as a possible trauma-producing
experience
5. the male mid-life crisis
6. dyslexia
7. autism
8. the causes of male violence
9. criminal recidivism
10. street homelessness among veterans (85% of
street homeless are men; about 1/3rd veterans)
11. steroid abuse
12. colorblindness
13. testicular cancer
14. prostate cancer
15. BPH benign prostatic hyperplasia
16. lifespan. Why the male-female gap increased
from one to seven years; solutions.
17. hearing loss over 30
18. erectile dysfunction
19. non-specific urethritis
20. epididymitis (a disease of the tubes that
transmit sperm)
21. DES sons (diethylstilbestrol, a drug women took
in the 1940s and 50s to prevent miscarriages;
the problems it created in daughters were attended
to, while the sons' problems were
neglected)[xv]
22. hemophilia
23. ADHD (attention-deficit hyperactivity disorder)
alternatives to ritalin
24. workplace deaths (94% men)and injuries
25. institutions turning backs on HGH (human growth
hormone) abuse among male athletes/body builders,
the damage of artificial turf...
26. concussions, and the cumulative damage from
multiple concussions (football)
27. male testosterone reduction between 50 and
70
28. infertility (40% of infertility is male; NIH
has increased female infertility research, but has
no research for male infertility)
29. depression (women cry, men deny; women check it
out, men tough it out; women express, men repress).
Rand Corporation finds 70% of male depression goes
undetected
30. being victim of domestic violence;
unwillingness to report battering
31. chlamydia as a creator of heart disease in men
between ages of 30-60[xvi]
32. estrogen transference to men during
intercourse[xvii]
33. Viagras effect on heart disease, stress,
and marital communication
34. LSD (lower sexual desire) Syndrome (seen in
more than half of men between 25 and 50)[xviii]
What Our Lifespan Tells Us About Who Has The
Power
Life expectancy can be thought of as one of the
best indicators of real power. When we learn that
non-whites have about 80% of the chance of whites
to reach
85,[xix] we know that
it is because of the relative powerlessness of
non-whites. But...
Item. A boy infant is only half as likely
as a girl infant to live to age 85.[xx]
Item. When a man is about 25, his anxiety
about "making it" is at its height. Here are the
odds of a person living out that year:
Odds of Living This Year
(25-Year-Olds) [xxi]
|
Females (White)
|
1754 to 1
|
Females (Black)
|
943 to 1
|
Males (White)
|
561 to 1
|
Males (Black)
|
311 to 1
|
Item. Blacks die earlier than whites from
11 of the 15 leading causes of death. Men die
earlier than women from 9 of the 10 leading causes
of death, and women and men are tied for two of the
other 15 leading causes of death.[xxii]
A major reason for mens shorter lives has
to do with the loneliness and isolation single men
feel as a result of not developing the tools to
express feelings, especially to other men. And
among married men, it is often from the stress of
long work weeks or the manual labor that tears away
at their body when they try to make enough income
so their children can have a better life than they.
This leads less-skilled or educated men to the
death professions."
How do we solve these problems? First, by
understanding them. One example: the mens
birth control pill.
* * *
[i] R. N. Anderson, K. D.
Kochanek, S. L. Murphy, Advance Report of
Final Mortality Statistics, 1995, Monthly
Vital Statistics Report (Hyattsville, MD: National
Center for Health Statistics, 1997), Vol. 45, No.
11, Suppl. 2, p. 19.
[ii] For children born in
2003, male and female life expectancies at birth
are 74.8 and 80.1 years. U.S. National Center for
Health Statistics. Table 96. Expectation of
Life at Birth, 1970 to 2003, and Projections, 2005
and 2010. /Statistical Abstract of the United
States: 2006./ Ed. U.S. Census Bureau. Washington,
D.C.: U.S. Census Bureau, 2006.
[iii]Interview July 14,
1992, with Vivian W. Pinn, MD, Director of the
Office of Research on Women's Health, National
Institutes of Health. not rep
[iv]Interview July 14,
1992, with Vivian W. Pinn, MD, Director of the
Office of Research on Women's Health, National
Institutes of Health. not rep
[v] Centers for Disease
Control and Prevention, National Vital Statistics
Report, Volume 54, No. 10, January 2006, Table 17,
pp. 69-76, www.cdc.gov/nchs/data/nvsr/nvsr53/nvsr53_05acc.pdf
[vi] United States
Department of Health and Human Services,
Estimates of Funding for Various Diseases,
Conditions, Research Areas, March 10, 2006,
www.nih.gov/news/fundingresearchareas.htm
[vii] Bibliographic
search by Steven L. Collins, Ph.D. of PubMeds
controlled vocabulary index (MeSH Terms) on June 6
and 7, 2006. Pub Med is a service of the National
Library of Medicine. See www.pubmed.gov. A search
for male NOT female was considered to
be gender-specific to men, and likewise for
women.
[viii] Bibliographic
search by Steven L. Collins, Ph.D. of PubMeds
controlled vocabulary index (MeSH Terms) on June 6
and 7, 2006. Pub Med is a service of the National
Library of Medicine. See www.pubmed.gov. A search
for male NOT female was considered to
be gender-specific to men, and likewise for
women.
[ix] Bibliographic search
by Steven L. Collins, Ph.D. of PubMeds
controlled vocabulary index (MeSH Terms) on June 6
and 7, 2006. Pub Med is a service of the National
Library of Medicine. See www.pubmed.gov. A search
for male NOT female was considered to
be gender-specific to men, and likewise for
women.
[x] Centers for Disease
Control and Prevention, National Vital Statistics
Report, Volume 54, No. 10, January 2006, Table 12,
pp. 41, www.cdc.gov/nchs/data/nvsr/nvsr53/nvsr53_05acc.pdf
[xi]Dr. David Gunnell,
et. al., Sex Differences in Suicide Trends in
England and Wales, The Lancet, No. 13,
February, 1999, p. 557.not rep
[xii]Centers for Disease
Control and Prevention, National Vital Statistics
Report, Volume 54, No. 10, January 2006, Table 17,
pp. 69-76, www.cdc.gov/nchs/data/nvsr/nvsr53/nvsr53_05acc.pdf
not rep
[xiii]USDHHS,
Healthy People 2010 Objectives: Draft for
Public Comment, September 15, 1998, pp. 25-16
to 25-17. not rep
[xiv] Search by Dr.
Steven L. Collins of Pub Meds controlled
vocabulary index (MeSH terms) on June 5, 2006. Pub
Med is a service of the National Library of
Medicine. See www.pubmed.gov
[xv]Pamela Newkirk;
A Mothers Nightmare: The Shocking Story
of DES Sons, McCalls, February, 1993,
pp. 93-164.. not rep
[xvi] Hans-Udo
Eickenberg, Androtropia: Diseases Leading to
Early Death in Men, paper presented at the
7th World Meeting on the Aging Male, February,
1998.
[xvii]Hans-Udo
Eickenberg, Androtropia: Diseases Leading to
Early Death in Men, paper presented at the
7th World Meeting on the Aging Male, February,
1998.Hans-Udo Eickenberg, Androtropia:
Diseases Leading to Early Death in Men, paper
presented at the 7th World Meeting on the Aging
Male, February, 1998.
[xviii]Hans-Udo
Eickenberg, Androtropia: Diseases Leading to
Early Death in Men, paper presented at the
7th World Meeting on the Aging Male, February,
1998.Hans-Udo Eickenberg, Androtropia:
Diseases Leading to Early Death in Men, paper
presented at the 7th World Meeting on the Aging
Male, February, 1998.
[xix]See the University
of California at Berkeley Wellness Letter, Vol. 8,
Issue 1, October, 1991, p. 1.
Ch. V) Domestic Violence: Who
is Doing the Battering and Whats the
Solution?
Excerpts from Does
Feminism Discriminate Against
Men? A debate by Warren Farrell
Men learn to call pain
glory; women learn to call the
police
Dont Men Batter Women More Because Men
Have More Power?
This question falsely assumes men batter women
more. Heres why thats a false
assumption...
If we look at only police reports and all-female
self-help groups, it appears that men perpetrate
about 90% of the domestic violence. But both these
figures are dependent on a persons
willingness to volunteer a complaint. The
womens movement taught us, though, that many
women keep feelings to themselves if they feel they
will be ridiculed. The only way to know if this
might also be true of men is to ask men, (rather
than wait for the men to call a police station and
say, My wife is beating me. Help me and
fear the police will die laughing.)
We began including men in questions about
domestic violence in 1975, when Suzanne Steinmetz,
Murray Straus and Richard Gelles conducted the
first scientific nationwide sample of both
sexes.[i] The researchers
could hardly believe their results. The sexes
appeared to batter each other about equally.
Dozens of objections arose (Dont
women batter only in self-defense?;
Arent women hurt more?). Over a
hundred researchers during the next thirty years
double-checked via their own studies. About half of
these researchers were women, and almost all of the
women were feminist academics. Most expected to
disprove the Steinmetz, Straus, and Gelles
findings.
To their credit, despite their assumptions that
men were the abusers, every domestic violence
survey done of both sexes over the thirty years in
the U.S., Canada, England, New Zealand and
Australia found one of two things: Women and men
batter each other about equally, or women
batter men more.
To the researchers greater amazement,
women themselves acknowledged they are more
likely to be violent, and to be the initiators of
violence. [ii]
Finally, women were more likely to engage in
severe violence that was not reciprocated.
[iii]
Studies also make it clear that the women are
more likely to inflict the severe violence. How?
Women are 70% more likely to use weapons against
men than men are to use weapons against
women...[iv] They are more
likely to wait until men are asleep, drunk, or
otherwise incapacitated. For example, one woman
waited until her husband fell asleep, then
sewed him in the sheets, and broke his bones
with a baseball bat.[v]
Abuse against men is most common among the
elderly, when a frustrated female caretaker starts
battering her older, sicker husband. He feels he
cant do anything about it because he is
dependent on her for his care.
When I first investigated this research, for
Women Cant Hear What Men Dont
Say, my preliminary readers expressed
considerable skepticism until I created an Appendix
with each of the fifty most significant studies and
their findings. The larger and better-designed the
study, the more likely the finding that women were
significantly more violent.
Since Women Cant Hear What Men
Dont Say was published in 1999, have new
studies have confirmed these findings? Yes. For
example, in 2006, Dr. Murray Straus presented data
from 68 studies in 32 nations, concluding that
college women worldwide commit more dating violence
than their male counterparts.[vi]
More specifically, about a third of dating
relationships had some violence, and most dating
violence was mutual. The second largest category
was couples where the female partner was the only
one who was violent. Perhaps the most revealing
finding is that when a woman is the dominant
partner, she is more likely to be violent than when
a man is dominant.
Arent Women Injured More Than Men?
Despite the fact that women are more likely to
use weapons and severe violence against men, 1.9%
of the men and 2.3% of the women surveyed said they
had sought medical treatment for an injury due to
partner abuse.[vii]
Heres why I believe that grossly
underestimates the injuries to men. When I do a
radio show and ask men who have been severely
battered to call in anonymously, I ask them if they
reported their injury to a hospital or police. The
answer almost invariably is no. Even
for a broken arm , if they seek medical attention,
it is reported as an athletic injury. And doctors
are not trained to cross examine the man to see
whether the claim of an athletic injury might be a
cover up
.
[i]Murray A. Straus,
Richard J. Gelles, and Suzanne K. Steinmetz, Behind
Closed Doors: Violence in the American Family (NY:
Anchor Press/Doubleday, 1980). repeated
[ii]Murray A. Straus,
Richard J. Gelles, and Suzanne K. Steinmetz, Behind
Closed Doors: Violence in the American Family (NY:
Anchor Press/Doubleday, 1980). This was the
original nationwide random sample that sparked the
controversy after finding that 3.8% of husbands
beat their wives; 4.6% of wives beat their
husbands. repeated
[iii]Straus, Richard J.
Gelles, Suzanne K. Steinmetz, Behind Closed Doors:
Violence in the American Family (NY:
Doubleday/Anchor, 1980), op. cit., p. 43-44.
repeated
[iv]US Department of
Justice, Bureau of Justice Statistics,
Violence by Intimates, March, 1998,
NCJ-167237 www.ojp.usodj.gov/bjs/pub/pdf/vi.pdf.
[v]" Barbara
Spencer-Powell, Overland Park, KS. In Letters
section, Time, January 11, 1988, p. 12. repeated
below
[vi] Murray A. Straus,
Men are More Likely than Women to be Victims
of Dating Violence, based on data from 68
coordinated studies including 13,601 students at 68
universities in 32 nations. by the Family Research
Lab of the University of New Hampshire, May 21,
2006.
[vii]Barbara J. Morse,
Beyond the Conflict Tactics Scale: Assessing
Gender Differences in Partner Violence,
Violence and Victims, Vol. 10, No. 4, 1995, pp.
251-272. not rep
[xx]University of
California at Berkeley Wellness Letter, Vol. 8,
Issue 1, October, 1991, p. 1.
[xxi]Almanac of the
American People, Tom and Nancy Biracree, Facts on
File, 1988.
[xxii]Centers for
Disease Control and Prevention, National Vital
Statistics Report, Volume 54, No. 10, January 2006,
Table C, p. 5, and p. 10, www.cdc.gov/nchs/data/nvsr/nvsr53/nvsr53_05acc.pdf
Ch. 6) The Politics and
Psychology of Rape, Sex, and Love
Excerpts from Does
Feminism Discriminate Against
Men? A debate by Warren Farrell
"Men who are unjustly accused of rape can
sometimes gain from the
experience."[i] - Vassar
College Assistant Dean of Students
Is Rape An Outgrowth Of Male Power?
MYTH. Rape is a manifestation of male
political and economic power.
FACT. Any given black man is three times
as likely to be reported a rapist as a white
man.[ii]
Do blacks suddenly have more political and
economic power? Maybe rape does not derive from
power, but rather from powerlessness.
Is Rape An Outgrowth Of Male
Violence?
MYTH. Rape has nothing to do with sexual
attractionit is just an act of
violence.[iii] This is
"proven" by the fact that women of every age are
raped.
FACT. Being at the age of greatest sexual
attraction makes the chances of being raped at
least 8400% greater than being over fifty.[iv]
When a woman is between ages 16 and 19, her
chances of being raped are 84 in 20,000; when she
is between 50 and 64, her chances are less than one
in 20,000.[v] Sexual
attraction, then, does have something to do with
who is raped.
What are we really doing when we ignore the role
of sexual attraction? We are ignoring our
responsibility as a culture for reinforcing men's
addiction to female sexual beauty and then
depriving men of what we've helped addict them to.
We will not be willing to stop reinforcing men's
addiction to beautiful women until we are willing
to stop the benefits that beautiful women receive
when men's addiction gets boys and men to perform
for women, pay for women, pursue women, and give
women the option to raise money or raise children
even as he has no option but to raise money.
Mens Experience of Pursuing, Paying and
Performing
While the label "date rape" has helped women
articulate the most traumatic aspect of dating from
women's perspectiveand helped attentive men
understand that date rape can be as traumatic as
stranger rape since it is a violation of trust--
men have no labels to help them articulate the most
traumatic aspects of dating from their perspective.
Now, of course, the most traumatic aspect is the
possibility of being accused of date rape by a
woman to whom he thought he was making love. If men
did label the worst aspects of the traditional male
role, though, they might label them "date
rejection," "date robbery," "date fraud," and "date
lying."
150 Risks of Rejection: The Anatomy of the
Journey from Eye Contact to Intercourse
A study conducted by two feminists found nearly
40% of college women acknowledged they had said
"no" to sex even "when they meant yes."[vi]
Whether its called dating, hanging
out, or hooking up, someone has
to take the risk of the first kiss, first tongue
kiss, and so on. Most women sense that if they
dont stop the tongue kiss at some point, the
journey from tongue kiss to intercourse is only
about a ten minute ride. So she says no
by withdrawing her tongue from time to time. And
then, instead of saying, when Im ready
to go beyond this, Ill let you know,
the man is expected to guess whether the
no means no forever, until the next
date, whether shes fulfilling a social
expectation to say no and really wants
him to pursue, or is a no until she
has: more liquor to relax, more coffee to wake up;
more talk about her, more feelings from him; more
slow dancing, more fast dancing.... The less she
has been drinking, the more likely he is to
experience about 150 risks of rejection between eye
contact and intercourse. And, of course, the 150
risks of rejection are more likely to be
experienced if the woman is one of the 40% who says
no when she means yes.
Robbery-by-Social-Custom: She Exists, He
Pays
To shorten the period of potential rejection,
men learn to pay for all of the 5 Ds--
Drinks, Dinner, Driving, Dating, and then, if he is
successful at repeatedly paying for the first 4
Ds, he gets to pay for the fifth: the
Diamond. Or, more precisely, a diamond with the
right 3 Cs (carrots, color and clarity).
Together, the expectation for him to pay for these
5 Ds can feel like robbery-by-social-custom:
she exists, he pays.
The only other social transaction among humans
in which the person paying is not guaranteed to
receive anything in return is that between parent
and child. Women who do not fully share the
expectation to pay are children-by-choice; they are
not women, but girls.
Few men are conscious of how the expectation to
pay pressures him to take jobs he likes less only
because they pay more; how this leads to stress,
heart attacks, and suicides that are the male
version of "my body, not my choice."
"Date Fraud"
If a man ignoring a woman's verbal "no" is
committing date rape, then a woman who says "no"
with her verbal language but "yes" with her body
language is committing date fraud.
The purpose of the fraud? To have sexual
pleasure without sexual responsibility, and
therefore without guilt or shame; to reinforce the
belief that he is getting a sexual favor while she
is giving a sexual favor, thus that he
owes her the 5 Ds before sex or
some measure of commitment, protection, or respect
after sex
..
[i]Nancy Gibbs, "When is
it Rape?" Time, June 3, 1991, p. 52.
[ii]US Department of
Justice, Bureau of Justice Statistics (hereinafter
USBJS), Criminal Victimization in the United
States: 1987, publication #NCJ115524, June, 1989,
p. 47, Table 41.
[iii]Susan Brownmiller,
Against Our Will: Men, Women, and Rape (NY: Bantam,
1976).
[iv]US Department of
Justice, Bureau of Justice Statistics (hereinafter
USBJS), Criminal Victimization in the United
States: 1987, publication #NCJ115524, pp. 18-19,
Table 5.
[v]US Department of
Justice, Bureau of Justice Statistics (hereinafter
USBJS), Criminal Victimization in the United
States: 1987, publication #NCJ115524, p p. 18-19,
Table 5.
[vi]Charlene L.
Muehlenhard and Lisa C. Hollabaugh, "Do Women
Sometimes Say No When They Mean Yes? the Prevalence
and Correlates of Women's Token Resistance to Sex,"
Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 1988,
Vol. 54, No. 5, p. 874.
Ch. 7) Does the Criminal
Justice System Discriminate Against Men?
Excerpts from Does
Feminism Discriminate Against
Men? A debate by Warren Farrell
Unequal Time For Equal Crime
Item. A man convicted of murder is 20 times more
likely than a woman convicted of murder to receive
the death penalty.[i]
Although women are one of eight of those arrested
for murder they are only one out of a hundred of
those executed. [ii]
Item. Andrea Yates murdered her five children.
She was found not guilty in 2006 by reason of
insanity, and given treatment rather than
punishment. [iii]
Item. Virginia, one of the leading states in
executing males, last executed a female almost a
century ago, in 1912.[iv]
Item. In North Carolina, a man who commits
second-degree murder receives a sentence an average
of 12.6 years longer than a woman who commits
second-degree murder.[v]
Item. The US Department of Justice records the
following sentence differences nationwide:
Number of Months To Which Females vs.
Males
Were Sentenced For the Same
Offense[vi]
Offense
|
Female
|
Male
|
% ot added
Time Males
Serve
|
Sexual Assault
(Include Rape)
|
41
|
80
|
95%
|
Aggravated
Assault
|
25
|
38
|
52%
|
Burglary
|
23
|
37
|
61%
|
Larceny
|
15
|
21
|
40%
|
Item. Being male contributes more to a longer
sentence than race or any other factor--legal or
extra-legal.[vii]
Item. Prosecutors consistently note that women
almost always receive lower bail for equal
crimes.[viii]
In essence, there are two bails: the male bail
and the female bail. Women are also more likely to
be released on their own recognizance.
The Execution ClubA Male-Only
Club
Item. At least thirty Americans have been
executed and later found innocent. All 30 were
men.[ix]
Item. 123 men (and zero women) have been
consigned to Death Row and later freed after their
convictions were proven unjustified.[x]
Approximately 1900 women commit homicide in the
United States each year.[xi]
When women commit homicide, almost 90% of their
victims are men.[xii]
Remember, though, that when women kill men it is
often via a contract killing, but never gets
recorded by the FBI as a woman killing a man, but
as a multiple offender
killing.[xiii]
For nearly four decades now, we have become
increasingly protective of women and decreasingly
protective of men--even if that man is a boy and a
legal minor, as was 16-year-old Heath Wilkins.
Adult Marjorie Filipiak and child Heath both pled
guilty to being co-conspirators in a murder.
Neither was a hardened criminal. Heath Wilkins got
the death sentence; Marjorie Filipiak went
free.[xiv] When Heath
Wilkins was found to have been a victim of child
sexual abuse, it did not deter the judge from
giving him the death sentence.[xv]
I know of no case in which a female minor who was a
co-conspirator with an adult man in a murder, and
found to have been a victim of child sexual abuse,
was given so much as a long prison sentence.
Item. Any given man in prison is still 1000% as
likely as any given woman to die via suicide,
homicide, or execution.[xvi]
Although women's prisons are safer than men's
prisons and designed more for rehabilitation,
virtually all the recent press coverage has focused
on the plight of the female prisoner--as if that
plight were unique to the female prisoner. The
result? States such as California are now financing
the study of only female prisoner health
issues.[xvii] Mothers
in Lancaster, Massachusetts, have special
facilities in which to see their children; fathers
do not.[xviii] In New
York's Bedford Hills Corrections Facility, mothers
have a live-in nursery; fathers do not.
Women Who Kill Too Much and the Courts That
Free Them: The "Female-Only" Defenses
Neither men nor women are exempt from killing
loved ones. The difference is in what happens to
them when they do. We have already seen the plea
bargain defense, and the contract killing
defense. Underlying these defenses is a
deep-seated propensity: When women kill, judges and
juries search for a reason, and the reason becomes
her defense. Thus many of the more than 10 defenses
I review in The Myth of Male Power imply a reason
the womans crime led to her receiving either
no sentence or a reduced sentence: the
Battered Woman Syndrome; PMS;
Post-partum depression; being a mother; children
need their mothers; the my child, my right to
abuse it defense; and the Svengali
defense.
No man has successfully used any of these
defenses in similar circumstances. Nor do men have
any equivalent "male-only" defenses. Each of these
defenses therefore violates the 14th Amendment's
guarantee of equal protection to both sexes under
the law. This double standard of self-defense will
be wreaking havoc in the legal system for
decades...
Sources:
[i]US Department of
Justice, Bureau of Justice Statistics (hereinafter
USBJS), Profile of Felons convicted in State
Courts, January, 1990, publication #NCJ-120021 by
Patrick A. Largan, PhD, and John M. Dawson (BJS
statisticians), p. 9.
[ii] Victor L. Streib,
Americas Aversion to Executing
Women, Ohio Northern University Womens
Law Journal, volume 1, pages 1-8 (1997); Victor L.
Streib, Death Penalty for Female Offenders,
January 1, 1973 through December 31, 2005.
Ohio Northern University. www.law.onu.edu/faculty/streib/documents/FemDeathDec2005_000.pdf.
Accessed July 31, 2006.
[iii] Angela K. Brown,
Jury finds Yates not guilty in
drownings, Yahoo! News, July 26, 2006.
www.forbes.com/technology/ebusiness/feeds/ap/2006/07/27/ap2908294.html.Accessed
September 11, 2006.
[iv] Victor L. Streib,
Death Penalty for Female Offenders, January
1, 1973 through December 31, 2005. Ohio
Northern University. www.law.onu.edu/faculty/streib/documents/FemDeathDec2005_000.pdf.
Accessed July 31, 2006.
[v]Matthew Zingraff and
Randall Thompson, "Differential Sentencing of Women
and Men in the USA," International Journal of the
Sociology of Law, 1984, Number 12, p. 401-413.
[vi]USBJS, State Court
Sentencing of Convicted Felons,
2002Statistical Tables, May 2005, publication
#NCJ-208910, Table 2.6 "Mean length of felony State
court sentences imposed, by offense and gender of
felons, 2002." www.ojp.usdoj.gov/bjs/pub/pdf/scscf02.pdf.
Downloaded August 1, 2006.
[vii]For the smaller
impact of racial differences, see USBJS, Profile of
Felons convicted in State Courts, January, 1990,
publication #NCJ-120021 by Patrick A. Largan, PhD,
and John M. Dawson (BJS statisticians), p. 1,
column 2. For the smaller impact of other
differences, see Matthew Zingraff and Randall
Thompson, "Differential Sentencing of Women and Men
in the USA," International Journal of the Sociology
of Law, 1984, Number 12,.
[viii]See Howie Kurtz,
"Courts Easier on Women," The Sunday Record (Bergen
County, NJ), October 5, 1975.
[ix] The first 23 are
documented in Hugo Adam Bedau and Michael L.
Radelet, "Miscarriages of Justice in
Potentially-Capital Cases," Stanford Law Review,
Vol. 40, No. 1, November, 1987, p. 21-179; the
additional seven are in Death Penalty Information
Center. Executed But Possibly Innocent.
www.deathpenaltyinfo.org/article.php?scid=6&did=111.
Downloaded August 8, 2006.
[x] Innocence Project.
Innocence: List of Those Freed From Death
Row. www.deathpenaltyinfo.org/article.php?scid=6&did=110.
Downloaded August 1, 2006.
[xi]USBJS, Sourcebook of
Criminal Justice Statistics, 1991, p. 442, Table
4.7.
[xii]John T. Kirkpatrick
and John A. Humphrey, "Stress in the Lives of
Female Criminal Homicide Offenders in North
Carolina," Human Stress: Current Selected Research,
Vol. 3, ed. James H. Humphrey (NY: AMS Press,
1989), p. 109-120.
[xiii] US Department of
Justice, Federal Bureau of Investigations, Crime in
the United States --2023 (Washington, DC: USGPO,
October 2004), table 2.7 titled Murder
Victim/Offender Relationship by Race and Sex.
www.fbi.gov/ucr/cius_03/xl/03tbl2-7.xls.
Downloaded July 31, 2006. The notes adjoining the
tables state that the table only applies
toSingle Victim/Single Offender
killings, i.e., multiple offender killings are not
broken down into gender categories. Only
Single Victim & Single Offender
crimes are broken down into gender categories. not
rep
[xiv]Ron Rosenbaum, "Too
Young To Die?" The New York Times Magazine, March
12, 1989.
[xv]Ron Rosenbaum, "Too
Young To Die?" The New York Times Magazine, March
12, 1989.
[xvi] Suicide,
execution, and homicide data for 1987 is from
USBJS, Correctional Populations in the United
States, publication #NCJ-118762, December, 1989, p.
105, Table 5.17. Prison statistics for 1987 are
from the US Department of Commerce, Bureau of the
Census, Statistical Abstracts of the United States:
1991, 111th edition, p. 195, Table 338.
[xvii]Statutes of 1991,
Chapter 692.
[xviii]Fred Strasser
and Mary C. Hickey, "Running Out of Room For Women
In Prison," Updates section, Governing, October,
1989, p. 70.
Ch. 8) Why Men Earn More
Discrimination? Choices?
Excerpts from Does
Feminism Discriminate Against
Men? A debate by Warren Farrell
Women who have never been married and
never had children earn 117% of their male
counterparts.
There is no single issue that bothers women in
the workplace more than the belief they get paid
less than men for the same work.[i]
And for many women, the psychological damage of
being undervalued hurts even more than the economic
damage of being underpaid.
For these reasons, when I was on the Board of
the National Organization for Women in New York
City in the seventies, I led protests against what
I felt was the discrimination the pay gap
reflected. And now, since my wife and two daughters
(both in college) work, discrimination against
women is discrimination against me.
But one question haunted me. If an
employer has to pay a man one dollar for the same
work a woman would do for 76 cents, why would
anyone hire a man? If women do produce more
for less, I thought, women who own their own
businesses would earn more than male business
owners. So I checked. I found that women who own
their own businesses earn only 49% of their male
counterparts.[ii]
Are women less effective? No. When the Rochester
Institute of Technology surveyed business owners
with MBAs, they discovered money was the primary
motivator for only 29% of the women, vs. 76% of the
men.[iii] Women
prioritize flexibility, fulfillment, autonomy and
safety. Women arent less effective; they have
different priorities.
After more than a decade researching this for my
book, Why
Men Earn More, I discovered 25 of these
differences in men and womens work-life
choices. All 25 choices lead to men earning more
money, but women having better lives (e.g.,
more time with family and friends).
I was learning that the road to high pay is a
toll road. Real power is about having a better
life. The male definition of power-- feeling
obligated to earn money someone else spends while
he dies sooner--is not real power.
Operationalizing real power involves discovering
which tolls are worth paying. For example, the
average full-time working man works at least three
more hours per week than the average full-time
working woman. Extra hours pay disproportionately.
People who work 45 hours per week earn more than
twice the pay than people who work 35 hours per
week (132% more pay for 28% more
time).[iv] Is the
trade-off worth it? Real power includes properly
assessing trade-offsassessing your
familys needs, your talents, your passion,
what different careers pay, and your values.
If the first piece of good news for women is
that they are doing a better job assessing
trade-offs than men, the implication is that men
have more to learn from women than women have to
learn from men.
There is a second piece of good news for
women: it appears women now earn more than men
when they make the same 25 choices (e.g., a
male and female civil engineer both with their
company 10 years, both traveling and relocating
equally, risking equal hazards, working equally
egregious weekends...) Even part-time working women
who work equal hours to men average higher
earnings.[v]
If this is true, then when women and men make
similar choices, does the pay gap either disappear
or get reversed? Yes. For example, women who
have never been married and who have never had
children earn 117% of their male
counterparts.[vi]
(This controls for education, hours worked and
age.)
Why? Without husbands, women have to focus on
earning more (longer hours, moving, traveling,
fields in technology). Without children, men are
freer to earn lessthat is, they are freer
to pursue fulfilling careers (e.g., teaching
writing or art) which tend to pay less because the
supply exceeds the demand. The supply exceeds the
demand exactly because they are more
fulfilling.
See if you can find in any text in any other
womens studies or gender studies class, a
list of fields in which women are paid more. In
Why
Men Earn More, youll see 39 of the
major fields in which women are paid at least 5%
more than menout of the more than 80 fields
that exist like this
Sources:
[i] Carol Klieman, Chicago
Tribune, reprinted as Closing Wage Gap for
Women May Depend on a Little Research, in San
Diego Union-Tribune, September 29, 1997.
[ii] U.S. Department of
the Treasury, Internal Revenue Service, Statistics
of Income Division. Unpublished tables E2-1; E2-3 ;
E3-1; and E3-. Data provided by Dr. Ying Lowry, an
economist at the Small Business Administration.
[iii] Richard DeMartino,
Ph.D and Robert Barbato Ph.D Gender
Differences Among MBA Entrepreneurs Rochester
Institute of Technology. United States Association
for Small Business and Entrepreneurship, 2001.Table
7. See www.usasbe.org/conferences/2001/proceedings/papers/018.pdf
[iv] US Department of
Labor, Bureau of Labor Statistics, unpublished data
for 2005 from the Current Population Survey, p.
110, Table A-18, "Usual Weekly Earnings of Employed
Wage and Salary Workers by Hours Usually Worked on
Primary Job and Sex, 2002 Annual Averages." Data
provided by Mr. Howard Hayghe, Economist, Bureau of
Labor Statistics Office of Employment and
Unemployment Statistics: (202) 691-6380. The
average worker working 35 hours per week earns
$384; the average worker working 45 hours per week
earns $894.
Hours Worked
|
Median Wkly Earnings
(2005)
|
30
|
$288
|
31
|
304
|
32
|
355
|
33
|
320
|
34
|
365
|
35
|
384
|
36
|
501
|
37
|
475
|
38
|
524
|
39
|
438
|
40
|
605
|
41
|
622
|
42
|
736
|
43
|
721
|
44
|
716
|
45
|
894
|
46
|
808
|
47
|
741
|
48
|
808
|
49-59
|
1,047
|
60+
|
1,112
|
[v] U.S. Bureau of the
Census, unpublished data from Employment and
Earnings, Table D-20, Median weekly earnings
of part-time wage and salary workers by selected
characteristics.
[vi] U.S. Census
Bureaus Survey of Income and Program
Participation, 2001 Panel, Wave 2.
© 2010, Warren
Farrell (with Steven Svoboda) vs. James P.
Sterba
* * *
Man is not the enemy here, but the fellow
victim. - Betty Friedan
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