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12 Simple "Mind Tricks" You'll Want To
Try...
In this newsletter we're going to give you 12 great
tips for celebrating your love.
These 12 tips could just as easily be
called..."!2 things to never forget about love"
because they not only apply to couples at
valentine's day but all of us the whole year
through...
Here's what we've discovered... Whether you're
in a committed relationship or not--Valentine's Day
is a day to celebrate love--
But there's a small problem...
Valentine's day can bring up a myriad of
emotions which can either bring couples closer for
a short period of time or create feelings of
loneliness and separation because of unmet
expectations.
So how can you deal with a holiday like this and
actually enjoy yourself, whether you are in a
"relationship" or not?
Here are our 12 suggestions to celebrate your
love with your partner and with the important
people in your life that will really serve you well
in creating the outstanding relationships that you
really want...
1) Don't Forget Kindness and Thoughtfulness.
We all get in a rush sometimes and forget to be
kind. We just want to get the things done that we
have to get done and move along to the next thing
to be done. Whether you are currently in an
intimate relationship or not--take a moment to be
kind to the people in your life. Kindness certainly
doesn't have to mean "doing" for someone (but it
can.) It can mean just giving a smile, sending a
kind, loving thought, or simply listening to a
story that you may have heard many times
before.
2) Don't Forget Appreciation. So often we
find ourselves dwelling on what irritates us about
the people in our lives and we forget to appreciate
the things about our relationships that are
working. Appreciation only works when you want
nothing in return. If there are "strings" along
with your appreciation of another person, (like you
want appreciation in return) it will seem like an
empty, needy gesture. Appreciation has to be
expressed from your heart and in such a way that is
genuine.
3) Listen Closely to What Your Loved One
Wants. Whether it's to make plans for a
Valentine's day celebration or just listening to
how your partner's day went--leave your ego and
your desire to help or "fix it" for him or her at
the door and just listen. We all get into habits
that stifle communication--that shut off a true
connection of the heart. To open up and bring more
joy and ease into your relationship, take a moment
to realize what you do to assume, to fix or to
judge (even though you may not think you are doing
those things) and just listen to understand your
partner.
4) Listen Closely to What You Want.
Listening closely to what you want can be even
harder than learning to listen to your loved one.
So many people have learned along the way that it's
not safe to feel emotions--and they simply don't
know how to listen to what they want. You have to
practice listening to the voice inside you so that
you can be honest and authentic with the people in
your life. You have to learn who you are and honor
that by letting others know who the real "you"
is.
5) If It's an Intimate Relationship, Don't
Forget Time Alone. In our busy lives, we often
forget to recharge by spending some time alone.
Whether it's taking a walk outside by yourself and
enjoying nature or it's taking 20 minutes to
meditate or tune in and calm your thoughts--we've
found that we are much better people and treat each
other more lovingly if we take time for
ourselves.
6) Don't Forget to Breathe. It may seem
kind of silly to remind you to not forget to
breathe, but so many of us actually live in the
land of anxious, shallow breathing. Belly breathing
can relax you, help you to clear your mind and keep
you in the present moment. What's that got to do
with creating great relationships? When we are
relaxed, we listen better to others and we don't
react quite so quickly from old patterns. We are
able to access a fresh point of view when we
breathe that can promote more understand and closer
connections.
7) Don't Forget the "Show". What's the
"show"? The show is what we do to show the other
person that he/she is special in our lives. It can
be a love note , a present or creating a special
night or weekend away. It can be elaborate or it
can be simple--whatever the two of you prefer. The
main thing is that you "show" the other person how
special they are to you.
8) Don't Forget Discernment. The media
likes to use hype and if you buy into what the mass
media promotes as "the way Valentine's day should
be," then you might be setting yourself up for
disappointment after the big day comes and goes.
Remember, it's not about the money you spend or
where you bought that special diamond necklace or
ring. It's about the love that's underneath all of
that.
9) Don't Forget to Be Present and Be
Real. If you're like most people, you're
usually either mentally thinking about what you
have to do or are going to do in the future or
thinking about what happened to you in the past.
The present moments fly by without you really
participating in them. To be present and real means
to be fully focusing on what's going on right here
and right now. Great relationships are built on
that idea and whether it's Valentine's day or not,
it's a terrific practice to get into.
10) Don't Forget to Think Long-Term Love and
Not Just Short-Term "Wow". Whether it's a
dating situation or long-term committed
relationship or marriage, when you are thinking
about a celebration of your love or of your
relationship, keep in mind what would create and
help foster continued long-term love instead of
going for the "wow" factor.
To know the difference, you have to be in tune
with how you and your partner like to
celebrate--and everyone's different so you have to
pay attention and listen.
11) Don't Forget that You're Never too Young
or Too Old for Love
Many people have a fixed age in their minds
where love is no longer possible. This age might be
40, 50, 60, or 80. We're here to tell you that love
is possible at any age.
The trick to finding or renewing it is to
recognize what ideas and beliefs have held you back
or have sabotaged love in the past and change those
habits.
Anyone can change and at any age. It just takes
a willingness and desire to do so and to take a
chance on having something wonderful.
12) Don't Forget About
Nostalgia
Anyone want to bring out those old records or
tapes of the music you used to listen to when you
first fell in love?
What a special way to celebrate your love and to
renew those feelings at the same time. You might go
to a restaurant or park that you used to go to or
do some activity together that used to make your
hearts sing.
Even if you are not currently in a relationship,
you can resurrect things that used to be fun for
you and have a mini-celebration of you.
We hope that these 12 tips on celebrating love
will be helpful to you in creating relationships
that you truly want. At any time during the year,
we invite you to make conscious decisions about
your life and not just let "life" happen to
you.
Our best to you,
©2010, Susie
& Otto Collins
Other Relationship Issues,
Books
Susie
and Otto Collins are spiritual and life partners
who are committed to helping others create
outstanding relationships of all kinds. They
regularly write, speak and conduct workshops and
seminars on love, relationships and personal and
spiritual growth to audiences all across the USA.
They are the creators of the "Relationship Toolkit"
which has helped people in over a dozen countries
improve their relationships. It includes a video
called Spiritual
Partnerships plus two
booklets Love
and Relationship Success
Secrets and
101
Relationship Quotes Worth a Million
Dollars! You can also
read more articles like these and subscribe to
their weekly newsletter on love and relationships
by visiting their web site at www.collinspartners.com
 Their
new E-book Should You Stay or Should You Go?
has just been released and is now available
www.stayorgo.com
See Archives 2009,
2008,
2007,
2006,
2005,
2004,
2003,
2002
and 2001.
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