Relationship Blocks, Barriers and
Blunders...pt 1
If there's any part of you that wants more love or
a better relationship and are wondering what you
might want to do to create it...
You'll be excited to know that this is the first
in a series of articles we're going to write on the
subject of "blocks, barriers and blunders" that
keep us from having all the love, passion,
connection and intimacy we want.
So, what are these blocks, barriers and blunders
that keep us from having the love passion and
connection we want that we're talking about?
There's certainly a whole lot more to it than
this but if theres a challenge in ANY area of your
life, you can know that it's something in one of
these areas...
- Your Thoughts
- Your Beliefs
- Your Attitudes
- Your Actions
or
That's it.
Everything else is just the details.
You can always trace any challenge back to one
of these areas and here's a practical example to
illustrate this...
Someone wrote to us recently and asked us...
"How can you stop thinking about the past and
only think about the good things you and your
partner have now?"
This is an excellent question and one we'll
answer in this way...
The person who wrote to us didn't say whether it
was 'their' past together or the past before
getting together that they couldn't stop thinking
negatively about so here are our thoughts...
In this situation, If you can't stop thinking
about the past (and it's causing challenges in the
relationship) then one of two things is going
on...
Either you have quite a few thoughts that you
continue to think on an ongoing basis in which you
aren't questioning the validity of and these
thoughts seem be a trigger for you and are keeping
you "stuck"...
or
...you have unhealed issues from your past or
current relationship that need to be identified,
looked at squarely and healed before they destroy
your relationship or marriage.
If you think about it this person's situation is
no different than anything you might be going
through now or in the future. It goes back to one
of those five issues we described above that need
to be solved.
To help you with any relationship challenge,
question, issue or concern here are some powerful
questions to ask yourself to help you determine
where the problem is and how you can release
it...
Are the things I'm thinking about this situation
actually true or are they things I'm only worried
or concerned about that aren't actually true?
What are the beliefs I hold that could be
contributing negatively to this situation?
Are these beliefs I hold moving me closer to or
further from the love, passion and connection I
want?
What attitudes do I have that are contributing
to this situation? What beliefs do I have that are
contributing to this situation?
Are the things I've done been helpful in this
situation or have they taken me further from what I
want?
Is there a better or different strategy I could
try in this situation to help us work through this
situation?
As you know from reading this newsletter, we're
huge fans of the power questions in making big
changes and shifts in your life.
The questions above are just a few and you're
certainly encouraged to come up with your own
questions to help you make shifts in your
relationships and life.
So, what do all these questions have to do with
relationship blocks, barriers and
blunders?
Everything actually.
Most people tend to think (erroneously) that the
problems of life are 'out there" instead of "in
here" or inside you.
If you are having challenges in your
relationships (or any aspect of your life for that
matter), asking yourself the right questions and
being open to new answers is a powerful strategy to
use for making shifts for the better.
Asking yourself the right questions and being
open to the answer also requires you take personal
responsibility for what you are creating in your
relationships and life.
This "taking personal responsibility" is, in our
opinion, something that we need much more of in a
world where nearly everyone wants to point the
finger outward and place blame elsewhere.
We believe that we are ALL the creators in our
lives.
Not someone else. It's us.
Please understand that we're NOT saying that
there isn't a god, creator or higher power that
created all of us and our world. That's not what
we're saying at all.
What we are saying is this-- not taking
responsibility for what happens in our lives is
definitely a barrier to connection with the people
in our lives.
What we have discovered is this: When we take
responsibility for our lives and everything in
them-- the problems, issues and challenges we have
seem to start working themselves out.
©2008, Susie
& Otto Collins
Other Relationship Issues,
Books
Susie
and Otto Collins are spiritual and life partners
who are committed to helping others create
outstanding relationships of all kinds. They
regularly write, speak and conduct workshops and
seminars on love, relationships and personal and
spiritual growth to audiences all across the USA.
They are the creators of the "Relationship Toolkit"
which has helped people in over a dozen countries
improve their relationships. It includes a video
called Spiritual
Partnerships plus two
booklets Love
and Relationship Success
Secrets and
101
Relationship Quotes Worth a Million
Dollars! You can also
read more articles like these and subscribe to
their weekly newsletter on love and relationships
by visiting their web site at www.collinspartners.com
Their
new E-book Should You Stay or Should You Go?
has just been released and is now available
www.stayorgo.com
See Archives 2006,
2005,
2004,
2003,
2002
and 2001.
Other Relationship Issues,
Books
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