Daily Thoughts & Issues

IN THIS ISSUE:

DECEMBER 31

Days left until the next millennium 01.01.3001

December 31 - Feast of Father Time, who ultimataely overcomes us all. * New Year's Eve - Vigil for the new year; night for self evaluation and resolving to better oneself during the new year. An opportunity for people around the world to focus their thoughts and energy on peace. The World Peace Meditation is observed internationally, beginning at noon Greenwich Mean Time (GMT) and lasting one hour (7am-8am EST). * Kwanzaa. Today, on the next to the last day of Kwanzaa, it is suggested that you have a karamu or African feast. This feast may range from a family dinner featuring dishes from the disapora to an elaborate Africa-themed party replete with music and dancing, and attended by scores of friends and relatives. Some people have their karamu on the last day of Kwanzaa, others have it on the Friday or Saturday during Kwanzaa. It is during the karamu that gifts are exchanged and a more formal dedication and homage given to preceding generations, with celebrants taking a sip from the unity cup as it circulates among them. The sixth day is "kuumba" (creativity). To do always as much as we can, in the way we can, in order to leave our community more beautiful and beneficial than we inherited it. * New Year's Eve - Vigil for the new year; night for self evaluation and resolving to better oneself during the new year. The Mystic's Wheel of the Year * A time to mourn the loss of a year of your life where you didn't fully pursue your life mission. Take a serious look at your own well-being and those around you. What do you want to be like in the 21st century - mind, body, emotions, spirit?  How long do you want to live into the 21st century. 5 years, 50 years, 100 years to more. Start now to take those steps necessary to prepare the mind and body for those goals. * A total ban on DDT use is ordered by the Environmental Protection Agency (1972). * First modern bank in the US, the Bank of North America, was organized by Robert Morris and received its charter from the Confederation Congress in 1781. * In evening, groups of "Namahage" men disguised as devils make door-to-door visits, growling. "Any good-for-nothing fellow hereabout?"  The object of this annual event is to give sluggards an opportunity to change their minds and become diligent. Otherwise, according to legend, they will be punished by devils. * One of the times that have been favored for the addition or subtraction of a second from clock time (to coordinate atomic and astronomical time). The determination to adjust is made by the Central Bureau of the International Earth Rotation Service at Paris. * With the expiration of the Panama Canal Treaty of 1979 at noon, the Republic of Panama assumed full responsibility for the canal and the US Panama Canal Commission ceased to exist. * Birthdays: Henri Matisse, Ben Kingsley, John Denver, George Catlett Marshall, John Nixon, Rex Allen, Sir Anthony Hopkins, Val Kilmer, Ben Kingsley (Krishna Bhanji), Tim Matheson, James Remar.

Test smoke and carbon monoxide detectors!
Watch for arrant fireworks!

DAILY THOUGHTS

In Richard Polwhele's early nineteenth-century Old English Gentleman is a description of the ancient wassel-bowl, called by yet another name, and filled with a favorite year-end beverage called lamb's wool - ale whipped to a froth with baked apple:  "A massy bowl, to deck the jovial day, Flash'd from its ample round sunlike ray. As, to the sons of sacred union dear, It welcomed with Lamb's Wool the rising year." Wassel. Festivity or intemperance, from the Saxon was-hoel, "be in health," which was the form in drinking (one's) health, the customary answer to which was drinc-hael!, "I drink your health." The wassel-bowl, wassel-cup and wassel-bread were all aids or accompaniments to festivity. (1859). Forgotten English

Kuumba (creativity): To do as much as we can, in whatever way we can, to leave our community more beautiful and beneficial than it was when we inherited it. African American History

My favorite was when we did it in one of those hospital beds that could move up and down. Best of 1001 Sex Secrets Every Man & Woman Should Know

I resolve to improve my parenting skills and to be there when my family needs me. Print out and sign your name here:_____________ Dr. Buff's 365 Day Parenting Calendar

If every day is an awakening, you will never grow old. You will just keep growing. New Passages

New Year's Eve. By Lithuanian custom, on New Year's Eve nine dinner plates hide nine symbols - of money, a cradle, bread, an old man, an old woman, a ladder, a death's head, a key, or a ring. Guests choose their places, and the symbols beneath their plates foretell something about their year to come. The Old Farmer's Almanac

The universe, this stepping-stone, has been laid down to prepare a way for us. But we ourselves must step across it, one by one. Through grace we are helped not to stumble and through grace we know that we are being welcomed. What more can we ask? The Road Less Traveled

If we can find the whole world in a grain of sand, we can also find the soul itself at the small point in life where destinies cross and hearts intermingle. Soul Mates

Things to Be Happy About:  Multicolored confetti. Saying "Happy New Year" in French. Turning over a new leaf. 2001: A Space Odyssey. 14,000 Things to Be Happy About

If you don't get it, say so. Really Important Stuff My Kids Have Taught Me

It may come as a relief to finally understand that you never actually master life, and that striving to do so will only lead to frustration. The best you can do is strive to master the process by which you experience it. Life is a year-around school from which you never actually graduate, so it is the learning process itself that brings true value to existence. If Life is a Game, These are the Rules

In 1997, on the occasion of its seventy-fifth anniversary, Time magazine published a commemorative issue highlighting the major events that had taken place since it first began publication in 1923. Not one item mentioned gay rights or the AIDS epidemic. Gay & Lesbian Calendar

As we sincerely seek to understand and integrate these principles into our lives, I am convinced we will discover and rediscover the truth of T.S. Eliot's observation: "We must not cease from exploration. And the end of all our exploring will be to arrive where we began and to know the place for the first time." Seven Habits of Highly Effective People

Wise men and women in every culture throughout history have found that the secret to happiness is not in getting more but in wanting less. We're living in one of those golden moments of change, the opportunity to freely give up the things that don't make us happy and to incorporate the lessons of recent decades into a simply but elegant lifestyle for the new millennium.  Simplify Your Life

Before the old year passes into the new, take time to reflect on how you did in managing the stress in your life this year. Did you make any positive changes in your life? Celebrate this!  Did you practice any helpful new ways of coping? Congratulate yourself on your effort!  Keep in mind that stress is not what happens to us, it's how we respond to what happens. Have a happy, healthy, STRESSSBUSTING New Year! Stress Busters

For the Kids: Dance into the new year! Put on a kids-only talent show with adults as judges. The winner gets to eat the biggest brownie with hot fudge and whipped cream for dessert.  To Do Today

I consider a goal as a journey rather than a destination. And each year I set a new goal. - Curtis Carlson Win the Day!

Couscous-Stuff Tomatoes: Holiday parties are always easier when appetizers take only three main ingredients, like this one. Prepare couscous according to packaging directions (omit butter) and combine 2 cups prepared couscous with 3 Tbs. pesto. Cut a thin slice off the base of each tomato (use 1 pint of cherry tomatoes). Then slice 1/8' off the top of each tomato and hollow them out, using a baby spoon or melon scooper. Fill each tomato with the couscous mixture and serve. Happy New Year! Parents Tips & Tricks

Nuevo/a (NWEHboh/bah) New. Feliz Ano Nuevo!  Happy New Year! Living Language

TODAY'S ISSUE: GOALS

By letting go, it all gets done; The world is won by those who let it go! - The Tao te Ching. That is what so much of our compulsion is about; it is not "natural" for men in this age, in this society, to "let go."  We hold on to old models of success, and sometimes to disastrous ways of seeing things to fruition. How often have we clung to what we thought was the life raft of sanity, of our work, of our need to complete a task, for the sake of the task, not for what it brings us. It will be important for me to keep my real goals in perspective today. I will need to be mindful of what makes me and those I love happy, not just what keeps me occupied. Meditations For Men Who Do Too Much

All our final resolutions are made in a state of mind that is not going to last - Marcel Proust. We all seek to live in the moment, but if we don't plan for the future, we won't have one. On the other hand, if we plan for a future that isn't firmly based in our present reality, we're not likely to get from here to there. The key to successful planning lies in realistic flexibility. A high school dropout with three children under five who dreams of being a trial lawyer must make plans that begin with a realistic evaluation of her present situation. What choices are open to help her reach her goal?  What can she do right now for herself and her family that will further her chances of going to law school?  At least she will want to make sure she isn't getting in her own way, and that she gives herself as many constructive options as possible. A forty-year-old single person who dreams of having a family needs to look at factors in his life that are preventing this outcome. Perhaps he no longer really wants it; perhaps he needs another goal. Or perhaps it still is the future he wants more than any other. Any successful plan begins with steps we can take now, one at a time. Realizing our dreams means understanding our real choices. Then we can decide. My resolutions should inspire me, not hem me in. If I've grown out of sync with my goals, it's time to reevaluate them. Family Feelings, Daily meditations for healthy relationships

Give me a roof over my head and something to drink, I've got all I need - Slash. It is only the first day of the year, but already we Men Who Do Next to Nothing are feeling the pressure to improve ourselves, to make today more productive than yesterday. Getting ahead is an exacting business that demand's sacrifices like getting up in the morning, showering, and putting on a suit. Success requires that we put work before everything else in our lives... including football. It insists that we compete and compromise and put off our first beer until noon. It is time to stop and see what happens to us when we live a goal-oriented life. Are we the men we want to be or the wimps our wives wished they'd married?  I wonder if I am the kind of guy I'd want to sit down and have a beer with? Meditations for Men Who Do Next to Nothing: and would like to do even less

Hey Man: Did you make a difference yesterday? Let us know at Contact Us. If you've been a clean shaver, grow a mustache, goatee or beard. If you've always had facial hair, consider what expression of feelings you may be covering up and shave. Shake things up. What Every Man Needs to Know Want to make a difference but you don't know where to start?

BOOK OF THE WEEK

From Boys to Men of Heart: Hunting as rite of passage. by Rick Hanson. Is hunting good for kids? Why do they do it? Is it sport of is in instinctive? Does hunting encourage violence or does it teach empathy and compassion? Would it be a more peaceful world if more men hunted? These are some of the questions addressed in this book. The author concludes that the social justification for hunting lies in its positive influence on the development of our youth into compassionate, virtuous and responsible adults who respect life and defend nature. OWLink Media, www.owlinkmedia.com, 2009, ISBN 978-1-57994-026-3

SPECIAL URLs

 

MENSTUFF COLUMNS BY AUTHOR

  • The Advice Diva - The Advice Diva - relationship and sexuality issues discussed - www.menstuff.org/columns/advicediva/archive.html
  • Peter Alsop - Song of the Month - www.menstuff.org/columns/alsop/archive.html
  • Reid Baer - A Man Overboard - Interview of the Month - www.menstuff.org/columns/overboard/archive.html
  • Reid Baer - Poetry - poetry read on YouTube - www.menstuff.org/columns/baer/archive.html
  • Molly Barrow - Shrink About This - www.menstuff.org/columns/barrow/archive.html
  • Peter Baylies - At Home Dads - on at-home-dad issues that impact fathers who stay at home to raise their kids - www.menstuff.org/columns/baylies/archive.html
  • Tom Blake - Middle-Age Relationships - from an expert on dating after 50. www.menstuff.org/columns/blake/archive.html
  • Mark Brandenburg - Great Fathers - on fathering issues - www.menstuff.org/columns/greatfathers/archive.html
  • Ted Braude - BoysWork - a columnist in the The Detroit Free Press "Body and Mind" section www.menstuff.org/columns/braude/archive.html
  • Armin Brott - A Father's Guide - hosts "Positive Parenting" on radio www.menstuff.org/columns/brott/archive.html
  • Dan Bulf - Get Real - weekly pod cast on men's issues - www.menstuff.org/columns/bulf/archive.html
  • Ken Byers - Transition - on men's life transitions - www.menstuff.org/columns/byers/archive.html
  • Sandra L. Caron - Sex Talk - college students get answers to their questions - www.menstuff.org/columns/sextalk/archive.html
  • Neil Chethik - Relationships - www.menstuff.org/columns/chethik/archive.html
  • Otto & Susie Collins - Susie and Otto - relationship issues discussed - www.menstuff.org/columns/susie&otto/archive.html
  • David Copeland - How to Succeed with Women - www.menstuff.org/columns/howtosucceed/archive.html
  • Forrest Craver - Spirituality & Social Change - www.menstuff.org/columns/craver/archive.html
  • Layne & Paul Cutright - Powerful Partnerships - relationship issues - www.menstuff.org/columns/cutright/archive.html
  • Ron DesMarais - Cavemen in the Kitchen - great recipes for men - www.menstuff.org/columns/desmarais/archive.html
  • Jed Diamond - Irritable Male Syndrome - www.menstuff.org/columns/diamond/archive.html
  • Doc Love - Women Don't Lie, Man Don't Listen - answers to relationship issues - www.menstuff.org/columns/doclov/archive.html
  • Barry Durdant-Hollamby - Creating Change - creating change in your life - www.menstuff.org/columns/durdant/archive.html
  • Irv Engel - The Real Deal - www.menstuff.org/columns/engel/archive.html
  • Nancy Fagan - Expert Dating Advice - with Nancy Fagan - www.menstuf.org/columns/fagan/archive.html
  • Warren Farrell - Men's Issues: Facts and Perspectives www.menstuff.org/columns/farrell/archive.html
  • Leonard Felder - Wake Up or Break Up - www.menstuff.org/columns/felder/archive.html
  • Marty Friedman - Strong Men, Strong Marriage - www.menstuff.org/columns/friedman/archive.html
  • Kim Garretson - Mansgland - using humor to encourage prostate exams - www.menstuff.org/columns/mansgland/archive.html
  • Lion Goodman - How to get Women to Love You - www.menstuff.org/columns/goodman/archive.html
  • Liz Halliday - In a Man's World - www.menstuff.org/columns/halliday/archive.html
  • Rick Hanson - Just One Thing - www.menstuff.org/columns/hanson/archive.html
  • Tim Hartnett - Daddyman Speaks - being a father www.menstuff.org/columns/daddyman/archive.html
  • John Hershey - Blood, Phlegm & Bile: Parenting with Humor - He writes a syndicated biweekly humor column about parenting and family life. www.menstuff.org/columns/hershey/archive.html
  • Gary Hoeber - Psychotherapy as Soul Work, www.menstuff.org/columns/hoeber/archive.html
  • Patrick Houser - Fathers Make a World of Difference, www.menstuff.org/columns/houser/archive.html
  • Paul Joannides - The Guide to Getting It On - on sex - www.menstuff.org/columns/getiton/archive.html
  • Jack Kahn - NOMAS Boston - www.menstuff.org/columns/kahn/archive.html
  • Patrick Kennedy - Seniors - www.menstuff.org/columns/kennedy/archive.html
  • Joe Kort - Gaydar - to increase understanding between gay and het men - www.menstuff.org/columns/kort/archive.html
  • David Kundtz - David Kundtz - presents seminars, workshops, retreats, and conference presentations in the areas of men's emotional health, stress management, and spirituality. www.menstuff.org/columns/kundtz/archive.html
  • Bruce Linton - Dr. Dad - on fathering - www.menstuff.org/columns/drdad/archive.html
  • Ron Louis - How to Succeed with Women - www.menstuff.org/columns/howtosucceed/archive.html
  • Wendy McElroy - Wendy McElroy on Feminism, www.menstuff.org/columns/mcelroy/archive.html
  • Robert N. Minor - Minor Details - on GBT sexuality - www.menstuff.org/columns/minordetails/archive.html
  • Robert L. Moore - Man & Mythology - www.menstuff.org/columns/moore/archive.html
  • Dennis W. Neder - Being a Man - general questions about men's lives - www.menstuff.org/columns/neder/archive.html
  • Marty Nemko - Worklife - general questions about men and work - www.menstuff.org/columns/nemko/archive.html
  • Eli Newberger - Eli Newberger - general information on men's lives - www.menstuff.org/columns/newberger/archive.html
  • Linda Nielsen - Embracing the Father - working with the father/daughter relationship. www.menstuff.org/columns/nielsen/archive.html
  • Kathy Noll - Bullies and Youth Violence - working with schools, teachers and parents to end school violence - www.menstuff.org/columns/noll/archive.html
  • Mark Phillips - Stay-at-Home-Dads - helping men maintain that which makes us men, instead of becoming hairy Mom-substitutes - www.menstuff.org/columns/phillips/archive.html
  • Carey Roberts - Socialism & Feminism - is a social commentator on political correctness. www.menstuff.org/columns/roberts/archive.html
  • Perry Rose - Dating, Relationship, Sex
  • Glenn Sacks - His Side - on fathering - www.menstuff.org/columns/sacks/archive.html
  • Trudy Schuett - Domestic Violence - serving the under-represented www.menstuff.org/columns/schuett/archive.html
  • Carl J. Schutt - Circumcision - social commentator on circumcision - www.menstuff.org/columns/schutt/archive.html
  • Hugo Schwyzer - A Pro-feminist's Response - www.menstuff.org/columns/schwyzer/archive.html
  • Michael Shaffran - Men's Issues - www.menstuff.org/columns/shaffran/archive.html
  • Judith Sherven - Judith & Jim - discussion and answers regarding relationship issues - www.menstuff.org/columns/judith&jim/archive.html
  • Judith Sherven - The New Intimacy - www.menstuff.org/columns/newintimacy/archive.html
  • George Simons - Bellicose Veins - is a US specialist in intercultural and gender communication who hangs out in Mandelieu - la Napoule, France, as well as in Santa Cruz, CA. www.menstuff.org/columns/simons/archive.html
  • Andy Smith - Hard Hat Brotherhood - www.menstuff.org/columns/hardhat/archive.html
  • David B. Smith - Fighting Father Dave - www.menstuff.org/columns/smith/archive.html
  • Jim Sniechowski - Judith & Jim - discussion and answers regarding relationship issues - www.menstuff.org/columns/judith&jim/archive.html
  • Jim Sniechowski - The New Intimacy - www.menstuff.org/columns/newintimacy/archive.html
  • Reena Sommer - Custody - is an internationally recognized relationship and divorce consultant. www.menstuff.org/columns/sommer/archive.html
  • R. Don Steele - Don Steele - relationship questions answered -
    www.menstuff.org/columns/steele/archive.html
  • David Steinberg - Comes Naturally - on sexuality - www.menstuff.org/columns/steinberg/archive.html
  • Mary Lou St Lucas - A Mother's Love - www.menstuf.org/columns/stlucas/archive.html
  • Surprise - Surprise Author - From a new columnist every month - www.menstuff.org/columns/surprise/archive.html
  • Steven Svoboda - Fatherhood, Activism and the Law www.menstuff.org/columns/svoboda/archive.html
  • Michael Taylor - A New Conversation with Men - www.menstuff.org/columns/taylor/archive.html
  • Bruce Van Horn - Yoga for Men - issues around the health benefits of yoga for men - www.menstuff.org/yoga/archive.html
  • Michael Webb - Secrets of Blissful Relationships - on relationship - www.menstuff.org/columns/bliss/archive.html
  • Stuart Wilde - Spirituality - www.menstuff.org/columns/wilde/archive.html
  • Dr.Williams - Sex Health - on sexual health - Dr. Williams, www.menstuff.org/columns/sexhealth/archive.html
  • KC Wilson - On Gender Politics is a social commentator and author. www.menstuff.org/columns/wilson/archive.html

Plus

  • Health Tips - on general health - www.menstuff.org/columns/healthtips/archive.html
  • Independent Means - resources for raising financially fit kids - www.menstuff.org/columns/independentmeans/archive.html
  • Numbers - www.menstuff.org/columns/numbers/archive.html
  • Questions - www.menstuff.org/columns/q&a/archive.html
  • Surprise - from a new columnist every month - www.menstuff.org/columns/surprise/archive.html
  • Words Can Heal - helping children grow up healthy - www.menstuff.org/columns/wordscanheal/archive.html
  • Wuzup?! - National or international events happening this month - www.menstuff.org/columns/whassup/archive.html 

AWARENESS EVENTS THIS MONTH

December is Kidstuff month. Also check Toy Safety and Happy Holidaze. Holiday Designated Driver, Colorectal Cancer Education and Awareness; Hug-A-Week for Hearing Impaired; International Calendar Awareness; *National Drunk and Drugged Driving Prevention; National Stress-Free Family Holidays; Safe Toys and Gifts; Universal Human Rights Month.

11/1-12/13: Merlin's Snug Hugs for Kids, 11/27-12/26: Ramadan. 11/1/00-01/01/01: Tie One on the Safety; 11/4-12/4: Jewish Book Month. 11/26-12/25: Operation Blessing International's 30 Days of Holiday Hope. 12/1-7: National Aplastic Anemia Awareness; Tolerance; 12/10-16: *Human Rights Week. 12/15-21: International Language Week 12/16-24: Posadas.. 12/17-23: Tell Someone They're Doing a Good Job Week. 12/22-29: Chanukah. 12/25-31: It's About Time Week. 12/26-1/1: Kwanzaa. 12/1: Day without Art/*UN World AIDS Day; 12/2: Pan American Health; International Day for the Abolition of Slavery, Advent/Festival of Lights. 12/3: UN International Day of Disabled Persons. 12/5: Bathtub Party; International Volunteer Day for Economy and Social Development Day. 12/7: *National Pearl Harbor Remembrance; UN International Civil Aviation Day. 12/9: UN Convention on Prevention and Punishment of the Crime of Genocide (1948). 12/10: * Human Rights; International Shareware; UN Combat Racism and Racial Discrimination Day. 12/12: Poinsettia Day. 12/15: *Bill of Rights; Underdog; One Day. 12/17: End Violence Against Sex Workers (International) *Pan American Aviation; Wright Brothers Day. 12/20: Louisiana Purchase; Mudd Day. 12/21: Forefathers'; Humbug; Phileas Fogg Wins a Wager; World Peace Day. 12/25: Christmas, A'phabet Day. 12/26: National Whiner's; Boxing Day. 12/28: Holy Innocents Day. 12/29: UN International Day for Biological Diversity Day. 12/31: Namahage (Japan); Make Up Your Mind Day. World Peace Meditation.

* Means a Presidential Proclamation has been made.

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Men are so competitive that we even "out-die" women in all 15 of the major causes of death in the U.S. Most of these deaths are preventable with a positive change in life-style, eating habits, and/or general health care. Let's not strive so hard to hold on to this record. See what you can change now to live a healthier life.
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