Daily Thoughts & Issues

IN THIS ISSUE:

OCTOBER 7

Days left until the next millennium 01.01.3001

Photo of the Week
David Madison/Tony Stone Images
Achieve Your Dreams

October 7 - Dow Jones Industrial Average (1896), began reporting an average of the prices of 12 industrial stocks in the Wall Street Journal. In the early days, these were largely railroad stocks. In 1928 Mr. Dow expanded the number of stocks to 30, where it remains today. The large, frequently-traded stocks in the DJIA represent about a fifth of the market value of all US stocks. * The Italian liner Achille Lauro is hijacked in the Mediterranean by four members of the Palestine Liberation Front (1985). * Birthdays: Imamu Amiri Baraka (Leroi Jones), Charles Dutoit, Thomas Keneally, Yo-Yo Ma, Al Martino (Alfred Cini), John Mellencamp, Desmond Tutu. Caesar Rodney, Thomas James Wise.

DAILY THOUGHTS

On this day Elijah Poole, who will one day be known as the Honorable Elijah Mohammed, founder of the Nation of Islam, is born in Sandersville, GA, 1897. African American History

When we're relaxing in bed together, it's not funny when you suddenly pull a hair out of my chest. - Shane, 31 Best of 1001 Sex Secrets Every Man & Woman Should Know

Your child won't be as tempted to eat the frosting on a newly baked cake if he or she knows you've saved what's left in the mixing bowl for a treat. Dr. Buff's 365 Day Parenting Calendar

Even short-term changes, like feeling happy or sad for twenty minutes, can powerfully affect our immune systems. A fascinating study at UCLA by Margaret Kemeny revealed that it is the absence of emotion that depresses the immune system and predisposes a person to disease. This is what happens when people withdraw or become passive about their lives. New Passages

If we seriously listen to the "God within us" -we usually find ourselves being urged to take the more difficult path, the path of more effort rather than less. To conduct the debate is to open ourselves to suffering and struggle. Each and every one of us, more or less frequently, will hold back from this work, will also seek to avoid this painful step. The Road Less Traveled

When we are close to love, then we can discern the authentic partner from the stand-in, the temporary rush of feeling from the invitation to create life. Soul Mates

 Well done is better than well said. - Franklin. Achieve Your Dreams

Things to Be Happy About:  Foreign exchange students. The lessons of On Golden Pond. One wind chime that just won't quit. 14,000 Things to Be Happy About

You don't find snakes - they find you. Really Important Stuff My Kids Have Taught Me

Marion Zimmer Bradley, who wrote the best-selling novel The Mists of Avalon, also published six lesbian romance novels written under the pseudonyms Lee Chapman, John Dexter, Miriam Gardner and Morgan Ives. She also contributed articles to early gay and lesbian publications such as The Ladder and The Mattachine Review.  Gay & Lesbian Calendar

You can't fit a square peg into a round hole. It takes courage to realize that something you've been working on, perhaps for a long time, just isn't right and to walk away from it. If what you're doing isn't working, sometimes it's best to move on, and to put your energies elsewhere. Simplify Your Life

0 to 12 months - Magic of Music. It's no surprise that singing is the simplest prescription for soothing a fussy baby. Parents all over the world sing to their infants for the same reason. Fortunately, your baby will be captivated by your voice regardless of whether you know the right words - or song more like a crow that a nightingale. Psychologists have found that listening to music benefits babies in many ways from the earliest moths of life, when connections in the brain are rapidly forming. By exposing your infant to music, you can enhance their ability to process information and stimulate language development by encouraging them to hone their listening skills and repeat the sounds they hear. Parents Tips & Tricks

To maintain your motivation to exercise, make it fun and rewarding. Play a sport you enjoy. Exercise with one or more friends. Combine exercise with something else you enjoy (for example, reading or watching your favorite TV show). Chart your progress and plan a reward for yourself after exercising X times during the week. Stress Busters

Pluck chores from a hat to stop sibling squabbles! Write chores, like feeding the dog or taking out the trash, on slips of paper. Put the slips into a hat. Everyone draws out of the hat. Save the slips to draw again as needed. To Do Today

The difference between a successful person and others is not a lack of strength, not a lack of knowledge, but rather a lack of will. - Vince Lombardi. Win the Day!

El fajo (FAHhoh). Wad. Saco un fajo de billetes del bolsillo. He pulled a wad of bills from his pocket.  Living Language

TODAY'S ISSUE: SEXUAL BATTERY

Caution: The following may contain language and thoughts that you might think are just not PC (politically correct), especially with the reports on activity in the White House. Well, skip this then. This is about a sexist story that appeared in the San Francisco Chronicle written by Scott Winokur titled, "New Wave of litigation expands women's rights to the bedroom". The story talks about a woman who received herpes simplex type 2 from her lover. She sued for sexual battery, negligent misrepresentation and intentional infliction of emotional stress. The article went on to cover chlamydia, papilloma virus, gonorrhea and syphilis (genital warts, yeast infection, etc.) What it neglected to say was that, chances are, the man got the infection from a woman. Isn't that interesting. Now, he probably won't sue her because men seldom go after women for money. I received herpes simplex type 2 from a professional woman who I later found out had the virus. She didn't inform my before we had sex, and claimed she couldn't have given it to me. Since I wasn't having sex with anyone else, I could have gotten it from stress. But, I doubt it. And, condoms didn't prevent it. It appears at the base of the penis in the same location as it appeared on her vagina. As the headline denotes, the way the law looks at it is that it's a woman's right to sue for receiving, but don't dare sue her if you're a man and a recipient! And women wonder why it's so hard for many men to trust them. But, if I become famous, you'll write a book about our private life, our sexual life, what will they think of next? And you want me to commit? Commitment is an "I lose, you win" word. One of the interesting lines in the story was very telling. Saying that Sexual Harassment cases became big because plaintiffs could get big awards from deep-pocket corporations, it goes on to say "But in STD cases, the sole source of recovery is the individual defendant, whose vulnerability to being sued is grater depending on HIS assets..." (Capitalization is mine.) What about HER assets? Another case in law, like domestic violence, stalking, visitation, sexual harassment, statutory rape, where, if the man is the victim, for the most part, those are the breaks. The law, the police, social services, you name it, just aren't there. It goes on to say that "The perfect defendant...is "independently wealthy, often times married with a family, eager to keep the matter confidential and willing to spend big bucks." Sort of a case of legal blackmail, wouldn't you say. However, "The prospect of getting a limited financial recovery or none at all from men of lesser means - while serving as a reality check on the hopes of sexually damaged women - hasn't halted their determined march to the courtroom." Continuing the "he" story, "...it may be difficult to prove the prospective defendant actually had the disease because HIS medical records may be unobtainable." "... it doesn't necessarily follow that HE was the partner who infected the plaintiff." "Moreover, a jury may be likely to think that an STD victim...'takes HER chances'." Women AND men are victims in the area of STD's. We get them from each other. Just another example of the law keeping women victims once again.

For the record: Est. annual newly diagnosed cases of STDs in the U.S. Chlamydia 4 million, human papilloma virus 500M-1 mil, gonorrhea 800M, genital herpes 200M-500M, syphilis 100M, AIDS 90M, hepatitis B 53M. SOURCE: Federal Centers for Disease Control & Prevention, 1994. See a Q&A Slide Guide on:

  • Sexually Transmitted Diseases Education Guide: This guide provides myths and facts about STDs, the cause and symptoms, diagnosis and treatment, and prevention information for the 10 major diseases. For anyone who is sexually active or thinking about becoming sexual. $3 each.
  • AIDS Education Guide: Includes the answers to the top 15 questions about AIDS plus Condom Do's and Don'ts. $3 each.

Hey Man: Did you make a difference yesterday? Let us know at Contact Us. Accept full responsibility for your behavior when you lose your temper. What Every Man Needs to KnowWant to make a difference but you don't know where to start?

Domestic Violence Prevention Month - See Issues. Also, see books on anger, violence-general, violence-domestic, violence-rape, violence-sexual, women's violence, sexual harassment plus Q&A Slide Guide on Gangs in Merchandise and Alternatives to Violence programs. - resources for male and female perpetrators and male and female victims. Got some information to add, send it to mailto:Contact Us.

BOOK OF THE WEEK

2010 State of the World: Transforming cultures from consumerism to sustainability, The Worldwatch Institute. Like a tsunami, consumerism has engulfed human cultures and Earth's ecosystems. Left unaddressed, we risk global disaster. But if we channel this wave, intentionally transforming our cultures to center on sustainability, we will not only prevent catastrophe but may user in an era of sustainability - one that allows all people to thrice while protecting, even restoring, Earth. In this year's report, 50+ renowned researchers and practitioners describe how we can harness the world's leading institutions - education, the media, business, governments, traditions and social movements - to reorient cultures toward sustainability. W. W. Norton, www.worldwatch.org, 2010, ISBN 978-0-393-33726-6

SPECIAL URLs

 

MENSTUFF COLUMNS BY AUTHOR

  • The Advice Diva - The Advice Diva - relationship and sexuality issues discussed - www.menstuff.org/columns/advicediva/archive.html
  • Peter Alsop - Song of the Month - www.menstuff.org/columns/alsop/archive.html
  • Reid Baer - A Man Overboard - Interview of the Month - www.menstuff.org/columns/overboard/archive.html
  • Reid Baer - Poetry - poetry read on YouTube - www.menstuff.org/columns/baer/archive.html
  • Molly Barrow - Shrink About This - www.menstuff.org/columns/barrow/archive.html
  • Peter Baylies - At Home Dads - on at-home-dad issues that impact fathers who stay at home to raise their kids - www.menstuff.org/columns/baylies/archive.html
  • Tom Blake - Middle-Age Relationships - from an expert on dating after 50. www.menstuff.org/columns/blake/archive.html
  • Mark Brandenburg - Great Fathers - on fathering issues - www.menstuff.org/columns/greatfathers/archive.html
  • Ted Braude - BoysWork - a columnist in the The Detroit Free Press "Body and Mind" section www.menstuff.org/columns/braude/archive.html
  • Armin Brott - A Father's Guide - hosts "Positive Parenting" on radio www.menstuff.org/columns/brott/archive.html
  • Dan Bulf - Get Real - weekly pod cast on men's issues - www.menstuff.org/columns/bulf/archive.html
  • Ken Byers - Transition - on men's life transitions - www.menstuff.org/columns/byers/archive.html
  • Sandra L. Caron - Sex Talk - college students get answers to their questions - www.menstuff.org/columns/sextalk/archive.html
  • Neil Chethik - Relationships - www.menstuff.org/columns/chethik/archive.html
  • Otto & Susie Collins - Susie and Otto - relationship issues discussed - www.menstuff.org/columns/susie&otto/archive.html
  • David Copeland - How to Succeed with Women - www.menstuff.org/columns/howtosucceed/archive.html
  • Forrest Craver - Spirituality & Social Change - www.menstuff.org/columns/craver/archive.html
  • Layne & Paul Cutright - Powerful Partnerships - relationship issues - www.menstuff.org/columns/cutright/archive.html
  • Ron DesMarais - Cavemen in the Kitchen - great recipes for men - www.menstuff.org/columns/desmarais/archive.html
  • Jed Diamond - Irritable Male Syndrome - www.menstuff.org/columns/diamond/archive.html
  • Doc Love - Women Don't Lie, Man Don't Listen - answers to relationship issues - www.menstuff.org/columns/doclov/archive.html
  • Barry Durdant-Hollamby - Creating Change - creating change in your life - www.menstuff.org/columns/durdant/archive.html
  • Irv Engel - The Real Deal - www.menstuff.org/columns/engel/archive.html
  • Nancy Fagan - Expert Dating Advice - with Nancy Fagan - www.menstuf.org/columns/fagan/archive.html
  • Warren Farrell - Men's Issues: Facts and Perspectives www.menstuff.org/columns/farrell/archive.html
  • Leonard Felder - Wake Up or Break Up - www.menstuff.org/columns/felder/archive.html
  • Marty Friedman - Strong Men, Strong Marriage - www.menstuff.org/columns/friedman/archive.html
  • Kim Garretson - Mansgland - using humor to encourage prostate exams - www.menstuff.org/columns/mansgland/archive.html
  • Lion Goodman - How to get Women to Love You - www.menstuff.org/columns/goodman/archive.html
  • Liz Halliday - In a Man's World - www.menstuff.org/columns/halliday/archive.html
  • Rick Hanson - Your Wise Brain - www.menstuff.org/columns/hanson/archive.html
  • Tim Hartnett - Daddyman Speaks - being a father www.menstuff.org/columns/daddyman/archive.html
  • John Hershey - Blood, Phlegm & Bile: Parenting with Humor - He writes a syndicated biweekly humor column about parenting and family life. www.menstuff.org/columns/hershey/archive.html
  • Gary Hoeber - Psychotherapy as Soul Work, www.menstuff.org/columns/hoeber/archive.html
  • Patrick Houser - Fathers Make a World of Difference, www.menstuff.org/columns/houser/archive.html
  • Paul Joannides - The Guide to Getting It On - on sex - www.menstuff.org/columns/getiton/archive.html
  • Jack Kahn - NOMAS Boston - www.menstuff.org/columns/kahn/archive.html
  • Patrick Kennedy - Seniors - www.menstuff.org/columns/kennedy/archive.html
  • Joe Kort - Gaydar - to increase understanding between gay and het men - www.menstuff.org/columns/kort/archive.html
  • David Kundtz - David Kundtz - presents seminars, workshops, retreats, and conference presentations in the areas of men's emotional health, stress management, and spirituality. www.menstuff.org/columns/kundtz/archive.html
  • Bruce Linton - Dr. Dad - on fathering - www.menstuff.org/columns/drdad/archive.html
  • Ron Louis - How to Succeed with Women - www.menstuff.org/columns/howtosucceed/archive.html
  • Tom Matlack - Tom Matlack - Good Men Project - www.menstuff.org/columns/matlack/archive.html
  • Wendy McElroy - Wendy McElroy on Feminism, www.menstuff.org/columns/mcelroy/archive.html
  • Robert N. Minor - Minor Details - on GBT sexuality - www.menstuff.org/columns/minordetails/archive.html
  • Robert L. Moore - Man & Mythology - www.menstuff.org/columns/moore/archive.html
  • Dennis W. Neder - Being a Man - general questions about men's lives - www.menstuff.org/columns/neder/archive.html
  • Marty Nemko - Worklife - general questions about men and work - www.menstuff.org/columns/nemko/archive.html
  • Eli Newberger - Eli Newberger - general information on men's lives - www.menstuff.org/columns/newberger/archive.html
  • Linda Nielsen - Embracing the Father - working with the father/daughter relationship. www.menstuff.org/columns/nielsen/archive.html
  • Kathy Noll - Bullies and Youth Violence - working with schools, teachers and parents to end school violence - www.menstuff.org/columns/noll/archive.html
  • Mark Phillips - Stay-at-Home-Dads - helping men maintain that which makes us men, instead of becoming hairy Mom-substitutes - www.menstuff.org/columns/phillips/archive.html
  • Carey Roberts - Socialism & Feminism - is a social commentator on political correctness. www.menstuff.org/columns/roberts/archive.html
  • Perry Rose - Dating, Relationship, Sex
  • Glenn Sacks - His Side - on fathering - www.menstuff.org/columns/sacks/archive.html
  • Trudy Schuett - Domestic Violence - serving the under-represented www.menstuff.org/columns/schuett/archive.html
  • Carl J. Schutt - Circumcision - social commentator on circumcision - www.menstuff.org/columns/schutt/archive.html
  • Hugo Schwyzer - A Pro-feminist's Response - www.menstuff.org/columns/schwyzer/archive.html
  • Michael Shaffran - Men's Issues - www.menstuff.org/columns/shaffran/archive.html
  • Judith Sherven - Judith & Jim - discussion and answers regarding relationship issues - www.menstuff.org/columns/judith&jim/archive.html
  • Judith Sherven - The New Intimacy - www.menstuff.org/columns/newintimacy/archive.html
  • George Simons - Bellicose Veins - is a US specialist in intercultural and gender communication who hangs out in Mandelieu - la Napoule, France, as well as in Santa Cruz, CA. www.menstuff.org/columns/simons/archive.html
  • Andy Smith - Hard Hat Brotherhood - www.menstuff.org/columns/hardhat/archive.html
  • David B. Smith - Fighting Father Dave - www.menstuff.org/columns/smith/archive.html
  • Jim Sniechowski - Judith & Jim - discussion and answers regarding relationship issues - www.menstuff.org/columns/judith&jim/archive.html
  • Jim Sniechowski - The New Intimacy - www.menstuff.org/columns/newintimacy/archive.html
  • Reena Sommer - Custody - is an internationally recognized relationship and divorce consultant. www.menstuff.org/columns/sommer/archive.html
  • R. Don Steele - Don Steele - relationship questions answered -
    www.menstuff.org/columns/steele/archive.html
  • David Steinberg - Comes Naturally - on sexuality - www.menstuff.org/columns/steinberg/archive.html
  • Mary Lou St Lucas - A Mother's Love - www.menstuf.org/columns/stlucas/archive.html
  • Surprise - Surprise Author - From a new columnist every month - www.menstuff.org/columns/surprise/archive.html
  • Steven Svoboda - Fatherhood, Activism and the Law www.menstuff.org/columns/svoboda/archive.html
  • Michael Taylor - A New Conversation with Men - www.menstuff.org/columns/taylor/archive.html
  • Bruce Van Horn - Yoga for Men - issues around the health benefits of yoga for men - www.menstuff.org/yoga/archive.html
  • Michael Webb - Secrets of Blissful Relationships - on relationship - www.menstuff.org/columns/bliss/archive.html
  • Stuart Wilde - Spirituality - www.menstuff.org/columns/wilde/archive.html
  • Dr.Williams - Sex Health - on sexual health - Dr. Williams, www.menstuff.org/columns/sexhealth/archive.html
  • KC Wilson - On Gender Politics is a social commentator and author. www.menstuff.org/columns/wilson/archive.html

Plus

  • Health Tips - on general health - www.menstuff.org/columns/healthtips/archive.html
  • Independent Means - resources for raising financially fit kids - www.menstuff.org/columns/independentmeans/archive.html
  • Numbers - www.menstuff.org/columns/numbers/archive.html
  • Questions - www.menstuff.org/columns/q&a/archive.html
  • Surprise - from a new columnist every month - www.menstuff.org/columns/surprise/archive.html
  • Words Can Heal - helping children grow up healthy - www.menstuff.org/columns/wordscanheal/archive.html
  • Wuzup?! - National or international events happening this month - www.menstuff.org/columns/whassup/archive.html 

AWARENESS EVENTS THIS MONTH

October is Adopt-a-Shelter Dog; Alternate History; Auto Battery Safety; Campaign for Healthier Babies; Celiac Sprue Awareness; Child Health; Computer Learning; Diversity Awareness; Dryer Vent Safety Awareness; Energy Management is a Family Affair-Improve Your Home; Family History; Family Sexuality Education, Fantasy; Gay and Lesbian History; Health Literacy; International Fired Up; Listen to Your Inner Critic; Lupus Awareness; National AIDS Awareness; National Animal Safety and Protection; *National Breast Cancer Awareness; National Car Care; National Crime Prevention; National Depression Education and Awareness; *National Disability Employment Awareness; *National Domestic Violence Awareness; National Family Health, National Family Sexuality Education; National "Gain the Inside Advantage"; National Home Inspection; National Orthodontic Health; National Pharmacy; National Physical Therapy; National Pizza; National Popcorn Poppin'; National Roller Skating; National Skin Care Awareness; National Spinal Health; National Toilet Tank Repair; Pediatric Cancer Awareness; Rett Syndrome Awareness; Sarcastics Awareness; Substance Abuse Prevention; Talk About Prescriptions; Unmasking Halloween Dangers; Vegetarian Awareness Month.

9/15-10/15: Hispanic Heritage Month. 10/1-7: Mental Illness Awareness; *Minority Enterprise Development; National Health Care Food Oct 8-14: *Fire Prevention; Home Based Business; National Adult Immunization Awareness; *National School Lunch, National Walk to School Week. 10/9-13: Pet Peeve, Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness Week. 10/10-16: Wildlife Week. 10/14-20: Ally, Pharmacy Week. 10/15-21: Getting the World to Beat a Path to Your Door; *National Character Counts; Teen Read Week. 10/16-22: National Health Education Week. 10/22-28: National Massage Therapy Awareness, National Save Yur Back Week. 10/23-31: Red Ribbon 10/25-31: Peace, Friendship & Goodwill Week. 10/1: World Vegetarian Day. 10/2: World Habitat Day, 10/3: Techies Day. 10/4: Toot Your Flute Day. 10/8 Global Learn Day; National Children's Day. 10/9: Indigenous Persons Day; *Leif Erikson Day, Yom Kippur, Canadian Thanksgiving Day. 10/11: Coming Out; Teddy Bear to Work Day; 10/12: Oktoberfest. 10/13: Blame Someone Else; Scream, Train Your Brain Day, Friday the 13th. 10/14: Sukkot. Be Bald and Be Free Day. 10/15: National Grouch; *White Cane Safety Day. 10/16: Dictionary;  Boss' Day, Intl. Librarians World Food Day. 10/17: Black Poetry, International Eradication of Poverty Day. 10/18: Canadian Persons;  Boost your Brain Day. 10/19: Evaluate Your Life Day 10/21: Sweetest Day. 10/22: Mother-In-Law; National Scientific Literacy Day. 10/23: National Mole Day. 10/24: United Nations Day. Black Thursday. 10/25: Cartoonists Against Crime Day. 10/26: Horseless Carriage; Mule, Intersex Awareness Day 10/27: Frankenstein Friday, Navy Day, Ugly Pickup Contest. 10/28: Make a Difference; Wild Foods Day; Day of Meditation. 10/29: Daylight Savings Times Ends. 10/31: Halloween; National Magic; *National Unicef Day. 11/2 is Election Day. Vote Absentee Ballot.

* Means a Presidential Proclamation has been made.

Domestic Violence Prevention Month - See Issues. Also, see books on anger, violence-general, violence-domestic, violence-rape, violence-sexual, women's violence, sexual harassment plus Q&A Slide Guide on Gangs and Safe Dating in Merchandise and Alternatives to Violence programs. - resources for male and female perpetrators and male and female victims. Got some information to add, send it to mailto:violence@menstuff.org

* Means a Presidential Proclamation has been made.

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Men are so competitive that we even "out-die" women in all 15 of the major causes of death in the U.S. Most of these deaths are preventable with a positive change in life-style, eating habits, and/or general health care. Let's not strive so hard to hold on to this record. See what you can change now to live a healthier life.
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