Daily Thoughts & Issues

IN THIS ISSUE:

JULY 2

Days left until the next millennium 01.01.3001

Photo of the Week
Brad Lewis/Tony Stone Images
Achieve Your Dreams

July 2 - Day discrimination on the basis of ethnicity and gender in public accommodations and employment was prohibited (1964) Mahayana Buddhist festival of Tara/Kuan Shih Yin/Kannon, Supreme Goddess of Nature and Perfect Buddha of many emanations; celebrates His vow to help all sentient beings. Buddhists daily act on their vows to help all sentient beings. The Mystic's Wheel of the Year * Franklin D. Roosevelt introduces the New Deal in his acceptance speech for the Democratic presidential nomination (1932). * The US Constitution takes effect (1788). * The Voting Rights Act of 1964 is signed into law prohibiting discrimination on the basis of race in public accommodations, in publicly owned or operated facilities, in employment and union membership and in the registration of voters and allowed for the cutoff of federal funds in areas where discrimination persisted. * President James Abram Garfield was shot as he entered the railway station at Washington, DC and never recovered from the wound. (1881) * St. Louis Race Riots (1917) where between 20-75 blacks were killed and hundreds injured. To protest this violence against blacks, W.E.B. DuBois and James Weldon Johnson of the NAACP led a silent march down Fifth Avenue in New York City. * Birthdays: Brock Peters, Hermann Hesse, James Abram Garfield, Thurgood Marshall, Jose Canseco, Jr., Ron Silver, Dave Thomas, Thomas Cramer, Sean Casey, Jimmy McNichol, Richard Petty.

DAILY THOUGHTS

Parents who are unwilling to risk the suffering of changing and growing and learning from their children are choosing a path of senility - whether they know it or not - and their children and the world will leave them far behind. Learning from their children is the best opportunity most people have to assure themselves of a meaningful old age. Sadly, most do not take this opportunity. The Road Less Traveled

The spirit of possessiveness has a place in marriage, sometimes as a strong shadow element, but friendship asks for a more objective intimacy. Soul Mates

I wish men knew they don't need an erection to please me. Other parts of their bodies work just as well - Candice, 29. It doesn't have to include penetration to be any good - Armand, 27. Best of 1001 Sex Secrets Every Man & Woman Should Know

On this day in 1908, Thurgood Marshall, who will be the first African American U.S. Supreme Court justice, is born. African American History

The judge who sentenced Oscar Wilde to two years imprisonment at hard labor in 1892 claimed homosexuality was a crime worse than rape and murder. Gay & Lesbian Calendar

Star-Spangled Sundaes. Cut two to three star shapes from each of four 1"-wide slices of pound cake using 1 1/4" to 2 1/4" cookie cutters. Remove green stem ends from 1 pint of rinsed strawberries and slice. Scoop 1 ball of vanilla ice cream onto each of 4 dessert plates. Add cake-cutout stars, sliced strawberries and blueberries, to decorate plate. Top ice cream with red sprinkles. Dr. Buff's 365 Day Parenting Calendar

It has become apparent that if female menopause is a silent passage, male menopause is an unspeakable passage. It is fraught with secrecy, shame, and denial. Everyone has some anxiety about aging, of course. But when men reach a certain age they simply stop bragging about their sexual conquests, or they make jokes. New Passages

Where are you going? What are you doing to get there?  Achieve Your Dreams

Things to Be Happy About: Morning rituals. A private sanctuary. Mind travel. 14,000 Things to Be Happy About

 If you're going to pull it up, pull it up by the roots. Really Important Stuff My Kids Have Taught Me

Openness means being receptive. Life will present you with innumerable lessons, none of which will be useful to you unless you recognize them and are open to their inherent value. These lessons will show up every day of your life, and as difficult as some of them may be, you need to change your perception and come to see them as gifts, or guides along your path toward living as your authentic self.  If Life is a Game, These are the Rules

To start your day out peacefully, try eating breakfast by candlelight. Stress Busters

Listen to your favorite authors while on the road!  If your kids are with you, pick up recorded books from your local library. You can find books like Mathilda by Ronald Dahl or Number the Stars by Lois Lowry. They're especially good if you love stories but can't read because you get carsick.  To Do Today

 I never could have done what I have done without the habits of punctuality, order, and diligence, without the determination to concentrate myself on one subject at a time... - Charles Dickens. Win the Day!

 Irse (EERseh) To leave, to go away. Te vas por ahi este fin de semana?  Are you going away this weekend? Living Language

TODAY'S ISSUE: PRIVACY

While privacy has become a thing of the past in the world of politics and entertainment (are they the same?), we must look deeper.

The modern family satisfies a desire for privacy and also a craving for identity - Philippe Aries. In privacy our sense of identity develops, our own special sense of self. In family life this sense of our uniqueness sometimes gets lost. The family that nurtures us can also invade our privacy and wound our sense of identity. We learn to share by being shared with, and our identities are straightened when we are granted privacy and respect. Parents sometimes fear to leave their children alone, with unprogrammed time; they sometimes fear "secrets", as thought privacy were something evil. These fears reflect parents' own fragile or damaged sense of identity, rather than real risks to children. The supple framework of the family can be a cage - or a launching platform. Respect for one another, faith, and trust can help children build spiritual strength that will sustain them in their future lives. A firm sense of identity and privacy costs nothing, yet it is a priceless gift, within reach of every family member. I will remember that everyone in my family has the same right to privacy as I do. Family Feelings

I wanted my sons to know that their mom stood for something - Mary Fisher. The children who depend on us know what we stand for, even if we don't. They see how we spend our time and our energies, see who our friends are, hear our prejudices and see our fears. They see our icons and visit our holy places with us. They know what we stand for, and they are never wrong. Just as our children do, we know, intuitively, what our mothers and fathers stood for. We are in touch, consciously or unconsciously, with our legacy. It often drives us as it will drive our children. We need to ask ourselves what we stand for. We need them to go deeper and ask ourselves if what we say we stand for is realized in action. Our holy places could be temple, museum, mountains, barroom or mall. The icons might be automobiles, crosses, religious art, or fashions. The transformational man is becoming more at home in silent places than in noisy ones. His battles are for peace rather than for parking places. His community is inclusive, not exclusive. What is holy to me?  Where do I workshop?

Hey Man: Did you make a difference yesterday? Let us know at Contact Us Plan snuggle mornings with your mat. Set out cereal for the children. Set up the coffee maker in your room and put a Please Do Not Disturb sign on the door. What Every Man Needs to Know Want to make a difference but you don't know where to start?

BOOK OF THE WEEK

Mr. Mean: Saving your relationshipo from the irritable male syndrome, Jed Diamond. Studies show that 50% of first marriages, 67% of second marriages, and 74% of third marriages end in divorce. As a marriage and family counselor who specializes in helping men and the women who love them, I’ve found that the hidden destroyer of good relationships is a phenomenon called “The Irritable Male Syndrome (IMS).” This book was written for the millions of women and men who want to understand how they can rescue their relationship, help their spouse, and save themselves. Vox Novus, 2010. ISBN 978-0-9842600-1-0

 

SPECIAL URLs

 

MENSTUFF COLUMNS BY AUTHOR

  • The Advice Diva - The Advice Diva - relationship and sexuality issues discussed - www.menstuff.org/columns/advicediva/archive.html
  • Peter Alsop - Song of the Month - www.menstuff.org/columns/alsop/archive.html
  • Reid Baer - A Man Overboard - Interview of the Month - www.menstuff.org/columns/overboard/archive.html
  • Reid Baer - Poetry - poetry read on YouTube - www.menstuff.org/columns/baer/archive.html
  • Molly Barrow - Shrink About This - www.menstuff.org/columns/barrow/archive.html
  • Peter Baylies - At Home Dads - on at-home-dad issues that impact fathers who stay at home to raise their kids - www.menstuff.org/columns/baylies/archive.html
  • Tom Blake - Middle-Age Relationships - from an expert on dating after 50. www.menstuff.org/columns/blake/archive.html
  • Mark Brandenburg - Great Fathers - on fathering issues - www.menstuff.org/columns/greatfathers/archive.html
  • Ted Braude - BoysWork - a columnist in the The Detroit Free Press "Body and Mind" section www.menstuff.org/columns/braude/archive.html
  • Armin Brott - A Father's Guide - hosts "Positive Parenting" on radio www.menstuff.org/columns/brott/archive.html
  • Dan Bulf - Get Real - weekly pod cast on men's issues - www.menstuff.org/columns/bulf/archive.html
  • Ken Byers - Transition - on men's life transitions - www.menstuff.org/columns/byers/archive.html
  • Sandra L. Caron - Sex Talk - college students get answers to their questions - www.menstuff.org/columns/sextalk/archive.html
  • Neil Chethik - Relationships - www.menstuff.org/columns/chethik/archive.html
  • Otto & Susie Collins - Susie and Otto - relationship issues discussed - www.menstuff.org/columns/susie&otto/archive.html
  • David Copeland - How to Succeed with Women - www.menstuff.org/columns/howtosucceed/archive.html
  • Forrest Craver - Spirituality & Social Change - www.menstuff.org/columns/craver/archive.html
  • Layne & Paul Cutright - Powerful Partnerships - relationship issues - www.menstuff.org/columns/cutright/archive.html
  • Ron DesMarais - Cavemen in the Kitchen - great recipes for men - www.menstuff.org/columns/desmarais/archive.html
  • Jed Diamond - Irritable Male Syndrome - www.menstuff.org/columns/diamond/archive.html
  • Doc Love - Women Don't Lie, Man Don't Listen - answers to relationship issues - www.menstuff.org/columns/doclov/archive.html
  • Barry Durdant-Hollamby - Creating Change - creating change in your life - www.menstuff.org/columns/durdant/archive.html
  • Irv Engel - The Real Deal - www.menstuff.org/columns/engel/archive.html
  • Nancy Fagan - Expert Dating Advice - with Nancy Fagan - www.menstuf.org/columns/fagan/archive.html
  • Warren Farrell - Men's Issues: Facts and Perspectives www.menstuff.org/columns/farrell/archive.html
  • Leonard Felder - Wake Up or Break Up - www.menstuff.org/columns/felder/archive.html
  • Marty Friedman - Strong Men, Strong Marriage - www.menstuff.org/columns/friedman/archive.html
  • Kim Garretson - Mansgland - using humor to encourage prostate exams - www.menstuff.org/columns/mansgland/archive.html
  • Lion Goodman - How to get Women to Love You - www.menstuff.org/columns/goodman/archive.html
  • Liz Halliday - In a Man's World - www.menstuff.org/columns/halliday/archive.html
  • Rick Hanson - Your Wise Brain - www.menstuff.org/columns/hanson/archive.html
  • Tim Hartnett - Daddyman Speaks - being a father www.menstuff.org/columns/daddyman/archive.html
  • John Hershey - Blood, Phlegm & Bile: Parenting with Humor - He writes a syndicated biweekly humor column about parenting and family life. www.menstuff.org/columns/hershey/archive.html
  • Gary Hoeber - Psychotherapy as Soul Work, www.menstuff.org/columns/hoeber/archive.html
  • Patrick Houser - Fathers Make a World of Difference, www.menstuff.org/columns/houser/archive.html
  • Paul Joannides - The Guide to Getting It On - on sex - www.menstuff.org/columns/getiton/archive.html
  • Jack Kahn - NOMAS Boston - www.menstuff.org/columns/kahn/archive.html
  • Patrick Kennedy - Seniors - www.menstuff.org/columns/kennedy/archive.html
  • Joe Kort - Gaydar - to increase understanding between gay and het men - www.menstuff.org/columns/kort/archive.html
  • David Kundtz - David Kundtz - presents seminars, workshops, retreats, and conference presentations in the areas of men's emotional health, stress management, and spirituality. www.menstuff.org/columns/kundtz/archive.html
  • Bruce Linton - Dr. Dad - on fathering - www.menstuff.org/columns/drdad/archive.html
  • Ron Louis - How to Succeed with Women - www.menstuff.org/columns/howtosucceed/archive.html
  • Tom Matlack - Tom Matlack - Good Men Project - www.menstuff.org/columns/matlack/archive.html
  • Wendy McElroy - Wendy McElroy on Feminism, www.menstuff.org/columns/mcelroy/archive.html
  • Robert N. Minor - Minor Details - on GBT sexuality - www.menstuff.org/columns/minordetails/archive.html
  • Robert L. Moore - Man & Mythology - www.menstuff.org/columns/moore/archive.html
  • Dennis W. Neder - Being a Man - general questions about men's lives - www.menstuff.org/columns/neder/archive.html
  • Marty Nemko - Worklife - general questions about men and work - www.menstuff.org/columns/nemko/archive.html
  • Eli Newberger - Eli Newberger - general information on men's lives - www.menstuff.org/columns/newberger/archive.html
  • Linda Nielsen - Embracing the Father - working with the father/daughter relationship. www.menstuff.org/columns/nielsen/archive.html
  • Kathy Noll - Bullies and Youth Violence - working with schools, teachers and parents to end school violence - www.menstuff.org/columns/noll/archive.html
  • Mark Phillips - Stay-at-Home-Dads - helping men maintain that which makes us men, instead of becoming hairy Mom-substitutes - www.menstuff.org/columns/phillips/archive.html
  • Carey Roberts - Socialism & Feminism - is a social commentator on political correctness. www.menstuff.org/columns/roberts/archive.html
  • Perry Rose - Dating, Relationship, Sex
  • Glenn Sacks - His Side - on fathering - www.menstuff.org/columns/sacks/archive.html
  • Trudy Schuett - Domestic Violence - serving the under-represented www.menstuff.org/columns/schuett/archive.html
  • Carl J. Schutt - Circumcision - social commentator on circumcision - www.menstuff.org/columns/schutt/archive.html
  • Hugo Schwyzer - A Pro-feminist's Response - www.menstuff.org/columns/schwyzer/archive.html
  • Michael Shaffran - Men's Issues - www.menstuff.org/columns/shaffran/archive.html
  • Judith Sherven - Judith & Jim - discussion and answers regarding relationship issues - www.menstuff.org/columns/judith&jim/archive.html
  • Judith Sherven - The New Intimacy - www.menstuff.org/columns/newintimacy/archive.html
  • George Simons - Bellicose Veins - is a US specialist in intercultural and gender communication who hangs out in Mandelieu - la Napoule, France, as well as in Santa Cruz, CA. www.menstuff.org/columns/simons/archive.html
  • Andy Smith - Hard Hat Brotherhood - www.menstuff.org/columns/hardhat/archive.html
  • David B. Smith - Fighting Father Dave - www.menstuff.org/columns/smith/archive.html
  • Jim Sniechowski - Judith & Jim - discussion and answers regarding relationship issues - www.menstuff.org/columns/judith&jim/archive.html
  • Jim Sniechowski - The New Intimacy - www.menstuff.org/columns/newintimacy/archive.html
  • Reena Sommer - Custody - is an internationally recognized relationship and divorce consultant. www.menstuff.org/columns/sommer/archive.html
  • R. Don Steele - Don Steele - relationship questions answered -
    www.menstuff.org/columns/steele/archive.html
  • David Steinberg - Comes Naturally - on sexuality - www.menstuff.org/columns/steinberg/archive.html
  • Mary Lou St Lucas - A Mother's Love - www.menstuf.org/columns/stlucas/archive.html
  • Surprise - Surprise Author - From a new columnist every month - www.menstuff.org/columns/surprise/archive.html
  • Steven Svoboda - Fatherhood, Activism and the Law www.menstuff.org/columns/svoboda/archive.html
  • Michael Taylor - A New Conversation with Men - www.menstuff.org/columns/taylor/archive.html
  • Bruce Van Horn - Yoga for Men - issues around the health benefits of yoga for men - www.menstuff.org/yoga/archive.html
  • Michael Webb - Secrets of Blissful Relationships - on relationship - www.menstuff.org/columns/bliss/archive.html
  • Stuart Wilde - Spirituality - www.menstuff.org/columns/wilde/archive.html
  • Dr.Williams - Sex Health - on sexual health - Dr. Williams, www.menstuff.org/columns/sexhealth/archive.html
  • KC Wilson - On Gender Politics is a social commentator and author. www.menstuff.org/columns/wilson/archive.html

Plus

  • Health Tips - on general health - www.menstuff.org/columns/healthtips/archive.html
  • Independent Means - resources for raising financially fit kids - www.menstuff.org/columns/independentmeans/archive.html
  • Numbers - www.menstuff.org/columns/numbers/archive.html
  • Questions - www.menstuff.org/columns/q&a/archive.html
  • Surprise - from a new columnist every month - www.menstuff.org/columns/surprise/archive.html
  • Words Can Heal - helping children grow up healthy - www.menstuff.org/columns/wordscanheal/archive.html
  • Wuzup?! - National or international events happening this month - www.menstuff.org/columns/whassup/archive.html

AWARENESS EVENTS THIS MONTH

July is Freedom Month. If you enjoy the benefits this country has to offer, you might check out what kind of men it took to found this country. The Fourth of July has more to it than beer, picnics, and baseball games. Read this! July is Anti-Boredom; National Mobility; Purposeful Parenting: Recreation and Parks; The month of the Muslim new year; Hemochromatosis Screening Awareness; National Foreign Language Month.

June 27 - July 4: Special Recreation Week. June 25-July 1: Deaf-Blindness Awareness Week. June 27 - July 4: Special Recreation Week. Jul 1-8 Music for Life; July 3-Aug 15: Air Conditioning Appreciation Days. Jul 4-10 - Freedom Week. July 8:-14: National Laundry Workers; National Therapeutic Recreation: Take Charge of Change Week. Jul 9-15 - Nude Recreation. July 15-21: *Captive Nations; Legal Revolution; National Plan to Promote Your Business Week. Jul 1 UN Day of Cooperation; International Joke; National Financial Freedom; National Recreation and Parks; National Purposeful Parenting, Jul 2 - I Forgot; Ducktona 500 Day; July 3: Compliment Your Mirror: Stay Out of the Sun Day. Jul 4 - Independence Day (U.S.); American Redneck; Fear from Fear of Speaking ; Independence-from-Meat Day; Sidewalk Egg Frying; Jul 5 - National Family Day, July 7: Father-Daughter Take a Walk Together; International UN Day of Cooperation. July 9: Don't Step on a Bee Day. July 10: Intern Appreciation Day. July 13: Skeptics' Day. July 14: Cow Apprecaition Day. July 15: National Ice Cream; Saint Swithin's Day. July 16: International Town Criers; Naitonal Get Out of the Doghouse Day. July 17: Wrong Way Corrigan Day. Jul 20 - Ugly Truck; Riot Act anniversary. July 21: Rat-Catchers Day. Jul 22 - Ice Cream Cone Day. July 23: Hot Enough For Ya Day. July 24: Cousins; Health and Happiness with Hypnosis Day. Jul 27 - *National Korean War Veterans Armistice; Take Your Houseplants for a Walk Day. July 29: *Parents' Day. Jul 30 - Father-In-Law Day, National Parent's Day.

* Means a Presidential Proclamation has been made.

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Men are so competitive that we even "out-die" women in all 15 of the major causes of death in the U.S. Most of these deaths are preventable with a positive change in life-style, eating habits, and/or general health care. Let's not strive so hard to hold on to this record. See what you can change now to live a healthier life.
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