Daily Thoughts & Issues

IN THIS ISSUE:

JULY 31

Days left until the next millennium 01.01.3001

Photo of the Week
Didier Givois/Adventure Photo & Film
Achieve Your Dreams

July 31 The cornerstone of the Philadelphia Mint, the first US  Government Building, was laid on this day (1792) * President Kennedy and General Chen Cheng met (1961) Kennedy agreed to support Nationalist China in its bid for UN membership and oppose the admission of Communist China to the United Nations. * US Patent Office opens (1790) and the first US patent was issued to Samuel Hopkins of Vermont for a new method of making pearlash and potash, The patent was signed by George Washington and Thomas Jefferson. * Apollo 15 astronauts David Scott and James Irwin spend two hours driving five miles along the moon's surface on the first lunar vehicle ride (1971). * Birthdays: Dean Cain, Milton Friedman, Irv Kupcinet, Gary Lewis, Don Murray, J. K. Rowling, Wesley Snipes.

Encourage children to play in the shade, not sun!

DAILY THOUGHTS

In our conversations we can bring along our treasures of memory and thought. This treasury of inner, personal materials is the stuff of conversation and the basis for developing a soul mate. Soul Mates

My husband blows or vibrates his lips, kind of like "raspberries," on my clitoris. It can be noisy, but it feels great - Peggy 44. Best of 1001 Sex Secrets Every Man & Woman Should Know

A child's imaginary friend is a fear-reducer. Somehow a child just doesn't feel quite as alone with a friend - real or imagined. Dr. Buff's 365 Day

Very few of us have a capacity for self-discipline great enough to maintain constructive relationships that are genuinely loving both inside and outside the family. Freedom and discipline are indeed handmaidens; without the discipline of genuine love, freedom is invariably non loving and destructive. The Road Less Traveled

As more men over fifty are being induced to retract out of the work world earlier than they wished, their wives, freed from family duties, are being seduced at the same stage to expand fully into the world. For men who feel threatened or confused about letting go of stereotyped gender roles, this new dynamic can register as pain, displacement, lost stamina, and a sense that time is running out. New Passages

Our greatest glory is not in never falling but in rising every time we fall. - Confucius Achieve Your Dreams

Things to Be Happy About:  An old family recipe. Poppies ablaze in the sun. Male emperor penguins.   14,000 Things to Be Happy About

Look behind the puppet theater. Really Important Stuff My Kids Have Taught Me

Think of all the activities in your life that you have deferred until you look different, better, or perhaps even perfect. I have a friend who dreams of learning to scuba dive, but refuses to even try because he worries about how he would look swaddled in a tight rubber wet suit. Complete self-acceptance would allow him to fully participate in all aspects of life, without reservations. If Life is a Game, These are the Rules

Dance. Put on some beautiful music. Stand in the middle of the room, close your eyes, and start to feel the music. Let it move through your entire body. Breathe with it. Create your own dance. You'll begin to feel incredibly uplifted, lighthearted, and joyous.  Simplify Your Life

What out for some of the common behavioral signs of stress:  Compulsive eating, increased smoking, increased mistakes. Foot or finger tapping. Reduced work efficiency. Hair pulling or twirling. Nervous laughter. Chronic tardiness. Increased drug/alcohol use. Grinding teeth. Overreaction to things. Constant scratching. Nail biting. Pacing the floor. Sleep problems. Change in social habits. Repetitive body movements. Inattention to grooming. Consult a mental health professional if any of these symptoms are long-lasting or intense. Stress Busters

Slice and peel peaches for a quick cobbler. Put peaches into a microwavable bowl. Sprinkle a little brown sugar and rolled oats. Microwave on high for 2 minutes or until sugar melts. Add a scoop of vanilla ice cream.  To Do Today

Aim at perfection in everything, though in most things it is unattainable. However, they who aim at it, and persevere, will come much nearer to it than those whose laziness and despondency make them give it up as unattainable. - Lord Chesterfield. Win the Day!

TODAY'S ISSUE: ROLES

Whether women are better than men I cannot say - but I can say they are certainly no worse - Golda Meir. We'll never know what women and men are "really" life, because boys and girls all grow up in societies where men's and women's roles have been constructed for them; prefabricated, we might say, or ready-to-wear, life uniforms. We can guess at differences; we can play games like, "If men had babies, they'd give medals for labor."  But in fact, women have babies, and the vital work of caring for them has never been given a market value. We think of work as paid employment and we devalue tasks that center around the home and family. For our social policies to change from antifamily to pro family, supporting child care, parental leave, shared jobs, tax restructuring, and investment in children's health, housing, nutrition, and education, we need more decision makers - women and men - who believe in the importance of the family. Perhaps if women were a majority of our elected representatives and government bureaucrats, they'd make these decisions faster. But for women to hold these jobs, we'd need to have the very policies we now lack. No one has a right to blame either sex, for neither is better or worse. But all of us have a vested interest in transforming social policies, for all of us are members of the human family. My role is to be the best woman or man I can, which means working toward my common interests with all my sisters and brothers. Family Feelings

Children have never been very good at listening to their elders, but they have never failed to imitate them. They must, they have no other models - James Baldwin. Whether the teacher is our father or mother or professor or clergy, we learned our most basic, and later ingrained, social behaviors from what they showed to us, not what they said to us. As children, we imitate behaviors, good and bad. We develop patterns of coping by virtue of how we see our elders cope. If our father learned to cope by canceling his feelings and running away from confrontation, then we too learn that behavior and almost certainly repeat it. I must always be mindful that it is not only my words that my children hear, but how hard I slam a door and how calmly I approach their failure. Meditations For Men Who Do Too Much

Hey Man: Did you make a difference yesterday? Let us know at Contact Us. Teach your children by what you do, not by what you say. What Every Man Needs to Know Want to make a difference but you don't know where to start?

 

BOOK OF THE WEEK

How to Be the One by Roy Sheppard. For men and women who take relationships seriously. Which of these qualities are the most important to you? Do you want someone who is kind, considerate, committed, honest, reliable, loving, compassionate, happy, interesting, optimistic, GSOH, intelligent and physically attractive? How many of these same qualities do you possess? Why would anyone choose to stop their own search once they've met you? Especially in today's online world where almost everyone is now only a click away from being the "ex" in "n-ex-t". In this book, you will learn how to improve your Emotional Fitness by strengthening your Emotional Core: the four qualities that provide you with the emotional stability, depth, and strength to make you as irresistible to a partner as they are to you. Adopt and absorb life-changing wisdom, insights and practical ideas to improve your current relationship or prepare yourself for The One you have yet to meet. www.RoySpeaks.com, 2010 Centre www.BeTheOneBook.com, ISBN 978-1901534139

SPECIAL URLs

 

MENSTUFF COLUMNS BY AUTHOR

  • The Advice Diva - The Advice Diva - relationship and sexuality issues discussed - www.menstuff.org/columns/advicediva/archive.html
  • Peter Alsop - Song of the Month - www.menstuff.org/columns/alsop/archive.html
  • Reid Baer - A Man Overboard - Interview of the Month - www.menstuff.org/columns/overboard/archive.html
  • Reid Baer - Poetry - poetry read on YouTube - www.menstuff.org/columns/baer/archive.html
  • Molly Barrow - Shrink About This - www.menstuff.org/columns/barrow/archive.html
  • Peter Baylies - At Home Dads - on at-home-dad issues that impact fathers who stay at home to raise their kids - www.menstuff.org/columns/baylies/archive.html
  • Tom Blake - Middle-Age Relationships - from an expert on dating after 50. www.menstuff.org/columns/blake/archive.html
  • Mark Brandenburg - Great Fathers - on fathering issues - www.menstuff.org/columns/greatfathers/archive.html
  • Ted Braude - BoysWork - a columnist in the The Detroit Free Press "Body and Mind" section www.menstuff.org/columns/braude/archive.html
  • Armin Brott - A Father's Guide - hosts "Positive Parenting" on radio www.menstuff.org/columns/brott/archive.html
  • Dan Bulf - Get Real - weekly pod cast on men's issues - www.menstuff.org/columns/bulf/archive.html
  • Ken Byers - Transition - on men's life transitions - www.menstuff.org/columns/byers/archive.html
  • Sandra L. Caron - Sex Talk - college students get answers to their questions - www.menstuff.org/columns/sextalk/archive.html
  • Neil Chethik - Relationships - www.menstuff.org/columns/chethik/archive.html
  • Otto & Susie Collins - Susie and Otto - relationship issues discussed - www.menstuff.org/columns/susie&otto/archive.html
  • David Copeland - How to Succeed with Women - www.menstuff.org/columns/howtosucceed/archive.html
  • Forrest Craver - Spirituality & Social Change - www.menstuff.org/columns/craver/archive.html
  • Layne & Paul Cutright - Powerful Partnerships - relationship issues - www.menstuff.org/columns/cutright/archive.html
  • Ron DesMarais - Cavemen in the Kitchen - great recipes for men - www.menstuff.org/columns/desmarais/archive.html
  • Jed Diamond - Irritable Male Syndrome - www.menstuff.org/columns/diamond/archive.html
  • Doc Love - Women Don't Lie, Man Don't Listen - answers to relationship issues - www.menstuff.org/columns/doclov/archive.html
  • Barry Durdant-Hollamby - Creating Change - creating change in your life - www.menstuff.org/columns/durdant/archive.html
  • Irv Engel - The Real Deal - www.menstuff.org/columns/engel/archive.html
  • Nancy Fagan - Expert Dating Advice - with Nancy Fagan - www.menstuf.org/columns/fagan/archive.html
  • Warren Farrell - Men's Issues: Facts and Perspectives www.menstuff.org/columns/farrell/archive.html
  • Leonard Felder - Wake Up or Break Up - www.menstuff.org/columns/felder/archive.html
  • Marty Friedman - Strong Men, Strong Marriage - www.menstuff.org/columns/friedman/archive.html
  • Kim Garretson - Mansgland - using humor to encourage prostate exams - www.menstuff.org/columns/mansgland/archive.html
  • Lion Goodman - How to get Women to Love You - www.menstuff.org/columns/goodman/archive.html
  • Liz Halliday - In a Man's World - www.menstuff.org/columns/halliday/archive.html
  • Rick Hanson - Your Wise Brain - www.menstuff.org/columns/hanson/archive.html
  • Tim Hartnett - Daddyman Speaks - being a father www.menstuff.org/columns/daddyman/archive.html
  • John Hershey - Blood, Phlegm & Bile: Parenting with Humor - He writes a syndicated biweekly humor column about parenting and family life. www.menstuff.org/columns/hershey/archive.html
  • Gary Hoeber - Psychotherapy as Soul Work, www.menstuff.org/columns/hoeber/archive.html
  • Patrick Houser - Fathers Make a World of Difference, www.menstuff.org/columns/houser/archive.html
  • Paul Joannides - The Guide to Getting It On - on sex - www.menstuff.org/columns/getiton/archive.html
  • Jack Kahn - NOMAS Boston - www.menstuff.org/columns/kahn/archive.html
  • Patrick Kennedy - Seniors - www.menstuff.org/columns/kennedy/archive.html
  • Joe Kort - Gaydar - to increase understanding between gay and het men - www.menstuff.org/columns/kort/archive.html
  • David Kundtz - David Kundtz - presents seminars, workshops, retreats, and conference presentations in the areas of men's emotional health, stress management, and spirituality. www.menstuff.org/columns/kundtz/archive.html
  • Bruce Linton - Dr. Dad - on fathering - www.menstuff.org/columns/drdad/archive.html
  • Ron Louis - How to Succeed with Women - www.menstuff.org/columns/howtosucceed/archive.html
  • Tom Matlack - Tom Matlack - Good Men Project - www.menstuff.org/columns/matlack/archive.html
  • Wendy McElroy - Wendy McElroy on Feminism, www.menstuff.org/columns/mcelroy/archive.html
  • Robert N. Minor - Minor Details - on GBT sexuality - www.menstuff.org/columns/minordetails/archive.html
  • Robert L. Moore - Man & Mythology - www.menstuff.org/columns/moore/archive.html
  • Dennis W. Neder - Being a Man - general questions about men's lives - www.menstuff.org/columns/neder/archive.html
  • Marty Nemko - Worklife - general questions about men and work - www.menstuff.org/columns/nemko/archive.html
  • Eli Newberger - Eli Newberger - general information on men's lives - www.menstuff.org/columns/newberger/archive.html
  • Linda Nielsen - Embracing the Father - working with the father/daughter relationship. www.menstuff.org/columns/nielsen/archive.html
  • Kathy Noll - Bullies and Youth Violence - working with schools, teachers and parents to end school violence - www.menstuff.org/columns/noll/archive.html
  • Mark Phillips - Stay-at-Home-Dads - helping men maintain that which makes us men, instead of becoming hairy Mom-substitutes - www.menstuff.org/columns/phillips/archive.html
  • Carey Roberts - Socialism & Feminism - is a social commentator on political correctness. www.menstuff.org/columns/roberts/archive.html
  • Perry Rose - Dating, Relationship, Sex
  • Glenn Sacks - His Side - on fathering - www.menstuff.org/columns/sacks/archive.html
  • Trudy Schuett - Domestic Violence - serving the under-represented www.menstuff.org/columns/schuett/archive.html
  • Carl J. Schutt - Circumcision - social commentator on circumcision - www.menstuff.org/columns/schutt/archive.html
  • Hugo Schwyzer - A Pro-feminist's Response - www.menstuff.org/columns/schwyzer/archive.html
  • Michael Shaffran - Men's Issues - www.menstuff.org/columns/shaffran/archive.html
  • Judith Sherven - Judith & Jim - discussion and answers regarding relationship issues - www.menstuff.org/columns/judith&jim/archive.html
  • Judith Sherven - The New Intimacy - www.menstuff.org/columns/newintimacy/archive.html
  • George Simons - Bellicose Veins - is a US specialist in intercultural and gender communication who hangs out in Mandelieu - la Napoule, France, as well as in Santa Cruz, CA. www.menstuff.org/columns/simons/archive.html
  • Andy Smith - Hard Hat Brotherhood - www.menstuff.org/columns/hardhat/archive.html
  • David B. Smith - Fighting Father Dave - www.menstuff.org/columns/smith/archive.html
  • Jim Sniechowski - Judith & Jim - discussion and answers regarding relationship issues - www.menstuff.org/columns/judith&jim/archive.html
  • Jim Sniechowski - The New Intimacy - www.menstuff.org/columns/newintimacy/archive.html
  • Reena Sommer - Custody - is an internationally recognized relationship and divorce consultant. www.menstuff.org/columns/sommer/archive.html
  • R. Don Steele - Don Steele - relationship questions answered -
    www.menstuff.org/columns/steele/archive.html
  • David Steinberg - Comes Naturally - on sexuality - www.menstuff.org/columns/steinberg/archive.html
  • Mary Lou St Lucas - A Mother's Love - www.menstuf.org/columns/stlucas/archive.html
  • Surprise - Surprise Author - From a new columnist every month - www.menstuff.org/columns/surprise/archive.html
  • Steven Svoboda - Fatherhood, Activism and the Law www.menstuff.org/columns/svoboda/archive.html
  • Michael Taylor - A New Conversation with Men - www.menstuff.org/columns/taylor/archive.html
  • Bruce Van Horn - Yoga for Men - issues around the health benefits of yoga for men - www.menstuff.org/yoga/archive.html
  • Michael Webb - Secrets of Blissful Relationships - on relationship - www.menstuff.org/columns/bliss/archive.html
  • Stuart Wilde - Spirituality - www.menstuff.org/columns/wilde/archive.html
  • Dr.Williams - Sex Health - on sexual health - Dr. Williams, www.menstuff.org/columns/sexhealth/archive.html
  • KC Wilson - On Gender Politics is a social commentator and author. www.menstuff.org/columns/wilson/archive.html

Plus

  • Health Tips - on general health - www.menstuff.org/columns/healthtips/archive.html
  • Independent Means - resources for raising financially fit kids - www.menstuff.org/columns/independentmeans/archive.html
  • Numbers - www.menstuff.org/columns/numbers/archive.html
  • Questions - www.menstuff.org/columns/q&a/archive.html
  • Surprise - from a new columnist every month - www.menstuff.org/columns/surprise/archive.html
  • Words Can Heal - helping children grow up healthy - www.menstuff.org/columns/wordscanheal/archive.html
  • Wuzup?! - National or international events happening this month - www.menstuff.org/columns/whassup/archive.html

AWARENESS EVENTS THIS MONTH

July is Freedom Month. If you enjoy the benefits this country has to offer, you might check out what kind of men it took to found this country. The Fourth of July has more to it than beer, picnics, and baseball games. Read this! July is Anti-Boredom; National Mobility; Purposeful Parenting: Recreation and Parks; The month of the Muslim new year; Hemochromatosis Screening Awareness; National Foreign Language Month.

June 27 - July 4: Special Recreation Week. June 25-July 1: Deaf-Blindness Awareness Week. June 27 - July 4: Special Recreation Week. Jul 1-8 Music for Life; July 3-Aug 15: Air Conditioning Appreciation Days. Jul 4-10 - Freedom Week. July 8:-14: National Laundry Workers; National Therapeutic Recreation: Take Charge of Change Week. Jul 9-15 - Nude Recreation. July 15-21: *Captive Nations; Legal Revolution; National Plan to Promote Your Business Week. Jul 1 UN Day of Cooperation; International Joke; National Financial Freedom; National Recreation and Parks; National Purposeful Parenting, Jul 2 - I Forgot; Ducktona 500 Day; July 3: Compliment Your Mirror: Stay Out of the Sun Day. Jul 4 - Independence Day (U.S.); American Redneck; Fear from Fear of Speaking ; Independence-from-Meat Day; Sidewalk Egg Frying; Jul 5 - National Family Day, July 7: Father-Daughter Take a Walk Together; International UN Day of Cooperation. July 9: Don't Step on a Bee Day. July 10: Intern Appreciation Day. July 13: Skeptics' Day. July 14: Cow Apprecaition Day. July 15: National Ice Cream; Saint Swithin's Day. July 16: International Town Criers; Naitonal Get Out of the Doghouse Day. July 17: Wrong Way Corrigan Day. Jul 20 - Ugly Truck; Riot Act anniversary. July 21: Rat-Catchers Day. Jul 22 - Ice Cream Cone Day. July 23: Hot Enough For Ya Day. July 24: Cousins; Health and Happiness with Hypnosis Day. Jul 27 - *National Korean War Veterans Armistice; Take Your Houseplants for a Walk Day. July 29: *Parents' Day. Jul 30 - Father-In-Law Day, National Parent's Day.

* Means a Presidential Proclamation has been made.

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Men are so competitive that we even "out-die" women in all 15 of the major causes of death in the U.S. Most of these deaths are preventable with a positive change in life-style, eating habits, and/or general health care. Let's not strive so hard to hold on to this record. See what you can change now to live a healthier life.
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