Daily Thoughts & Issues

IN THIS ISSUE:

JULY 29

Days left until the next millennium 01.01.3001

Photo of the Week
Didier Givois/Adventure Photo & Film
Achieve Your Dreams

July 29 - Cornscateous Air:  Beware on Cornscateous air - humid, warm and damp - and suitable for growing corn or catching pneumonia. Those with asthma or other respiratory problems should especially be on the alert. The Old Farmer's Almanac * Prince Charles, heir to the throne of England, weds Lady Diana Spencer (1981) in a ceremony televised around the world. * After delivering the atomic bomb to Tinian Island, the cruiser Indianapolis was torpedoed by a Japanese submarine. Of 1,196 crew members, more than 350 were immediately killed in the explosion or went down with the ship. With no rescue ships nearby the remaining survivors must endure the next 84 hours in ocean waters. Spotted by air on August 2, only 318 sailors remained alive, the others either having drowned or been eaten by sharks. This is the Navy's worst loss at sea. * NASA (National Aeronautics and Space Administration) was established to direct US space policy. (1958) * Birthdays: Ken Burns, Dag Hammarskjold, Peter Jennings, Benito Mussolini, Booth Tarkington, Paul Taylor, David Warner, Wil Wheaton.

DAILY THOUGHTS

If one can say that one has built genuinely loving relationships with a spouse and children, then one has already succeeded in accomplishing more than more people accomplish in a lifetime. The Road Less Traveled

Dag Hammerskjold, the second secretary general of the United Nations, was born on this day in 1905. While very private about his personal life, most of his contemporaries believed he was gay. Gay & Lesbian Calendar

When I'm naked, I still want you to look me in the eye - Sheri 22. Best of 1001 Sex Secrets Every Man & Woman Should Know

Soul resides in the overtones and undertones, not in the flat body of literal events. Conversation performs a pleasurable and gentle alchemy on experience. Experience itself takes wing from conversation. Soul Mates

Your child's mastering of manners increases the probability that you and your family, no matter the social situation, will be invited back. Dr. Buff's 365 Day Parenting Calendar

Maybe, as the ratio of sex hormones alters with age, men's and women's brains go through a passage and begin to approximate more of the brain structure of the other sex. Can this be part of the reason that men uncover more of their "feminine" side and women their "masculine" side in Second Adulthood?  New Passages

 Sit loosely in the saddle of life. - Robert Louis Stevenson. Achieve Your Dreams

Things to Be Happy About: Hash brown cakes with ketchup. Pre industrial village life. Archaeology on TV. 14,000 Things to Be Happy About

Ask if you can play, too. Really Important Stuff My Kids Have Taught Me

Finding the wisdom inside you and reaching your highest levels of evolution can be one of the most selfless lessons you can learn. It is the one that will elevate you and propel you along your own path so that you may contribute the results of all your other lessons to the rest of the world. If Life is a Game, These are the Rules

When we really, deeply understand each other, we open the door to creative solutions and third alternatives. Our differences are no longer stumbling blocks to communication and progress. Instead, they become the stepping stores to synergy. Seven Habits of Highly Effective People

Poor communication skills can be a major source of stress at home and at work, as well as socially. If you have difficulty relating to others without being aggressive, manipulative or passive, consider assertiveness training.  Stress Busters

Teach your kids Zig Zag. Instead of It chasing all the other players, all the other players have to chase It. Whoever catches the person becomes Honesty It! To Do Today

What this power is I cannot say; all I know is that it exists and it becomes available only when a man is in that state of mind in which he knows exactly what he wants and is fully determined not to quit until he finds it. - Alexander Graham Bell Win the Day!

4 years - "I forgot."  Forgetting happens, as one child puts it, when ideas "fall out of your brain."  That is an apt definition, but one that a child usually can't fully comprehend until age 4. When your child first used the words "remember" and "forget," you probably assumed they understood their meaning. Well, not exactly. Sometimes children's vocabularies outrun their comprehension of the words they so glibly use. Before age 4, children don't realize that a person needs to know a fact before remembering or forgetting can occur. Instead, many children think that "forgetting" means "not knowing something" or "guessing incorrectly." Parents Tips & Tricks

El socorrista (sohkohRREEStah) Lifeguard. Se hubiera ahogado sin ayuda del socorrista. She would have drowned without the lifeguard's help. Living Language

TODAY'S ISSUE: HONESTY

The Spiritual Principle of Honesty. An honest man's the noblest work of God - Alexander Pope. The principle of honesty can be applied to any problem in our lives that is overwhelming us. Many of us have some addictive or compulsive behavior that causes us grief and pain, that regularly steals our peace of mind. It may be workaholism, sex addiction, a need to control others, or perhaps just a general feeling that things aren't working out. Whatever our situation, change begins with the honest admission of our powerlessness over that situation. Men often have a difficult time with the concept of powerlessness. We have been taught that success only comes from being powerful and in control. Life, however, doesn't work that way and most of what goes on in our lives is beyond our control. We can't control the actions of moods of others; we can't control the economy. Sometimes even our own behavior and feelings seems out of our control. The honest admission of powerlessness takes the pressure off of us and opens the possibility of living life on life's terms. Today, I will make an honest appraisal of my behavior, my relationships and my life as it is right now. A Quiet Strength: Meditations on the Masculine Soul

The child says nothing but what it heard by the fire - George Herbert. Small children are a reliable test for sincerity - like a litmus test. They won't turn blue when confronted with hypocrisy but they'll reveal it nonetheless, by their eager questions and desire to understand. From the mildest social lies to the most severe incongruity between what we say and what we do, children perceive hypocrisy and question it. They have a single standard for behavior; if they feel something, they express it. And they're eager to learn the rules that govern grown-up behavior, since obviously we have different standards from their. The tricky part of growing up is learning to restrain our actions without betraying our feelings. Children depend on their adult caregivers to teach this by example. Honest speech and behavior are simple, and when children are puzzled by adults, it's often because something is being hidden or disguised. Of course, children soon learn to lie, especially if their families encourage lies or secrets. They bring into the world what they hear by the fire (even if the fire is an incandescent bulb), and parents can be shocked to hear their words return on the boomerang of a child's tongue. My style of expressing myself developed in my family. Have I learned to say what I mean? Family Feelings

Honesty is stronger medicine than sympathy, which may console but often conceals - Gretel Ehrlich. We owe our brothers and sisters in this program our honest feedback. And we need the same honesty from them. There are times in meetings when it would be easiest to give someone sympathy and privately mutter to ourselves, "He isn't facing the bitter truth."  That sympathy avoids a confrontation, but it doesn't give the healing medicine of honesty. In the same way, we may long, at times, for someone to give us warm strokes, and what they give instead is a bitter pill. The most important thing we have to give one another is the truth of what we see and hear. We don't have to tell them what to do. We don't have to have all the right answers. But we do have the obligation to speak up about how things look to us. And we need to listen without defensiveness when others are honest with us. Today, I will say what I see and hear. I will listen to other people's honesty with me. Touchstones

A lie would make no sense, unless the truth were felt to be dangerous - Carl Jung. We tell ourselves and others, if we can get away with it, that we are in control, that everything is OK. We hunger for control, to lose the feeling that everything is just beyond us, and that we're caught up in a self-made cyclone. The truth is that we lie to one another, to ourselves, to our wives, to our children, to our partner, and to our friends. The truth is we are hiding something dangerous. It's our addiction to work, our addiction to promise, and our gigantic need to cover for our sickness. Today, when I feel the overload of responsibility, I will look at it for what it is: self-imposed. I will not feel ashamed, but I do need to be aware of what I am doing to myself. Meditations For Men Who Do Too Much

Hey Man: Did you make a difference yesterday? Let us know at Contact Us. It's never too late to make amends. Ultimately, I believe we each know in our own hearts whether we have ever been abused or have abused someone else. As a first step, acknowledge those episodes to yourself. Then consider ways you might make amends for any acts of abuse you may have committed. What Every Man Needs to Know Want to make a difference but you don't know where to start?

BOOK OF THE WEEK

How to Be the One by Roy Sheppard. For men and women who take relationships seriously. Which of these qualities are the most important to you? Do you want someone who is kind, considerate, committed, honest, reliable, loving, compassionate, happy, interesting, optimistic, GSOH, intelligent and physically attractive? How many of these same qualities do you possess? Why would anyone choose to stop their own search once they've met you? Especially in today's online world where almost everyone is now only a click away from being the "ex" in "n-ex-t". In this book, you will learn how to improve your Emotional Fitness by strengthening your Emotional Core: the four qualities that provide you with the emotional stability, depth, and strength to make you as irresistible to a partner as they are to you. Adopt and absorb life-changing wisdom, insights and practical ideas to improve your current relationship or prepare yourself for The One you have yet to meet. www.RoySpeaks.com, 2010 Centre www.BeTheOneBook.com, ISBN 978-1901534139

SPECIAL URLs

 

MENSTUFF COLUMNS BY AUTHOR

  • The Advice Diva - The Advice Diva - relationship and sexuality issues discussed - www.menstuff.org/columns/advicediva/archive.html
  • Peter Alsop - Song of the Month - www.menstuff.org/columns/alsop/archive.html
  • Reid Baer - A Man Overboard - Interview of the Month - www.menstuff.org/columns/overboard/archive.html
  • Reid Baer - Poetry - poetry read on YouTube - www.menstuff.org/columns/baer/archive.html
  • Molly Barrow - Shrink About This - www.menstuff.org/columns/barrow/archive.html
  • Peter Baylies - At Home Dads - on at-home-dad issues that impact fathers who stay at home to raise their kids - www.menstuff.org/columns/baylies/archive.html
  • Tom Blake - Middle-Age Relationships - from an expert on dating after 50. www.menstuff.org/columns/blake/archive.html
  • Mark Brandenburg - Great Fathers - on fathering issues - www.menstuff.org/columns/greatfathers/archive.html
  • Ted Braude - BoysWork - a columnist in the The Detroit Free Press "Body and Mind" section www.menstuff.org/columns/braude/archive.html
  • Armin Brott - A Father's Guide - hosts "Positive Parenting" on radio www.menstuff.org/columns/brott/archive.html
  • Dan Bulf - Get Real - weekly pod cast on men's issues - www.menstuff.org/columns/bulf/archive.html
  • Ken Byers - Transition - on men's life transitions - www.menstuff.org/columns/byers/archive.html
  • Sandra L. Caron - Sex Talk - college students get answers to their questions - www.menstuff.org/columns/sextalk/archive.html
  • Neil Chethik - Relationships - www.menstuff.org/columns/chethik/archive.html
  • Otto & Susie Collins - Susie and Otto - relationship issues discussed - www.menstuff.org/columns/susie&otto/archive.html
  • David Copeland - How to Succeed with Women - www.menstuff.org/columns/howtosucceed/archive.html
  • Forrest Craver - Spirituality & Social Change - www.menstuff.org/columns/craver/archive.html
  • Layne & Paul Cutright - Powerful Partnerships - relationship issues - www.menstuff.org/columns/cutright/archive.html
  • Ron DesMarais - Cavemen in the Kitchen - great recipes for men - www.menstuff.org/columns/desmarais/archive.html
  • Jed Diamond - Irritable Male Syndrome - www.menstuff.org/columns/diamond/archive.html
  • Doc Love - Women Don't Lie, Man Don't Listen - answers to relationship issues - www.menstuff.org/columns/doclov/archive.html
  • Barry Durdant-Hollamby - Creating Change - creating change in your life - www.menstuff.org/columns/durdant/archive.html
  • Irv Engel - The Real Deal - www.menstuff.org/columns/engel/archive.html
  • Nancy Fagan - Expert Dating Advice - with Nancy Fagan - www.menstuf.org/columns/fagan/archive.html
  • Warren Farrell - Men's Issues: Facts and Perspectives www.menstuff.org/columns/farrell/archive.html
  • Leonard Felder - Wake Up or Break Up - www.menstuff.org/columns/felder/archive.html
  • Marty Friedman - Strong Men, Strong Marriage - www.menstuff.org/columns/friedman/archive.html
  • Kim Garretson - Mansgland - using humor to encourage prostate exams - www.menstuff.org/columns/mansgland/archive.html
  • Lion Goodman - How to get Women to Love You - www.menstuff.org/columns/goodman/archive.html
  • Liz Halliday - In a Man's World - www.menstuff.org/columns/halliday/archive.html
  • Rick Hanson - Your Wise Brain - www.menstuff.org/columns/hanson/archive.html
  • Tim Hartnett - Daddyman Speaks - being a father www.menstuff.org/columns/daddyman/archive.html
  • John Hershey - Blood, Phlegm & Bile: Parenting with Humor - He writes a syndicated biweekly humor column about parenting and family life. www.menstuff.org/columns/hershey/archive.html
  • Gary Hoeber - Psychotherapy as Soul Work, www.menstuff.org/columns/hoeber/archive.html
  • Patrick Houser - Fathers Make a World of Difference, www.menstuff.org/columns/houser/archive.html
  • Paul Joannides - The Guide to Getting It On - on sex - www.menstuff.org/columns/getiton/archive.html
  • Jack Kahn - NOMAS Boston - www.menstuff.org/columns/kahn/archive.html
  • Patrick Kennedy - Seniors - www.menstuff.org/columns/kennedy/archive.html
  • Joe Kort - Gaydar - to increase understanding between gay and het men - www.menstuff.org/columns/kort/archive.html
  • David Kundtz - David Kundtz - presents seminars, workshops, retreats, and conference presentations in the areas of men's emotional health, stress management, and spirituality. www.menstuff.org/columns/kundtz/archive.html
  • Bruce Linton - Dr. Dad - on fathering - www.menstuff.org/columns/drdad/archive.html
  • Ron Louis - How to Succeed with Women - www.menstuff.org/columns/howtosucceed/archive.html
  • Tom Matlack - Tom Matlack - Good Men Project - www.menstuff.org/columns/matlack/archive.html
  • Wendy McElroy - Wendy McElroy on Feminism, www.menstuff.org/columns/mcelroy/archive.html
  • Robert N. Minor - Minor Details - on GBT sexuality - www.menstuff.org/columns/minordetails/archive.html
  • Robert L. Moore - Man & Mythology - www.menstuff.org/columns/moore/archive.html
  • Dennis W. Neder - Being a Man - general questions about men's lives - www.menstuff.org/columns/neder/archive.html
  • Marty Nemko - Worklife - general questions about men and work - www.menstuff.org/columns/nemko/archive.html
  • Eli Newberger - Eli Newberger - general information on men's lives - www.menstuff.org/columns/newberger/archive.html
  • Linda Nielsen - Embracing the Father - working with the father/daughter relationship. www.menstuff.org/columns/nielsen/archive.html
  • Kathy Noll - Bullies and Youth Violence - working with schools, teachers and parents to end school violence - www.menstuff.org/columns/noll/archive.html
  • Mark Phillips - Stay-at-Home-Dads - helping men maintain that which makes us men, instead of becoming hairy Mom-substitutes - www.menstuff.org/columns/phillips/archive.html
  • Carey Roberts - Socialism & Feminism - is a social commentator on political correctness. www.menstuff.org/columns/roberts/archive.html
  • Perry Rose - Dating, Relationship, Sex
  • Glenn Sacks - His Side - on fathering - www.menstuff.org/columns/sacks/archive.html
  • Trudy Schuett - Domestic Violence - serving the under-represented www.menstuff.org/columns/schuett/archive.html
  • Carl J. Schutt - Circumcision - social commentator on circumcision - www.menstuff.org/columns/schutt/archive.html
  • Hugo Schwyzer - A Pro-feminist's Response - www.menstuff.org/columns/schwyzer/archive.html
  • Michael Shaffran - Men's Issues - www.menstuff.org/columns/shaffran/archive.html
  • Judith Sherven - Judith & Jim - discussion and answers regarding relationship issues - www.menstuff.org/columns/judith&jim/archive.html
  • Judith Sherven - The New Intimacy - www.menstuff.org/columns/newintimacy/archive.html
  • George Simons - Bellicose Veins - is a US specialist in intercultural and gender communication who hangs out in Mandelieu - la Napoule, France, as well as in Santa Cruz, CA. www.menstuff.org/columns/simons/archive.html
  • Andy Smith - Hard Hat Brotherhood - www.menstuff.org/columns/hardhat/archive.html
  • David B. Smith - Fighting Father Dave - www.menstuff.org/columns/smith/archive.html
  • Jim Sniechowski - Judith & Jim - discussion and answers regarding relationship issues - www.menstuff.org/columns/judith&jim/archive.html
  • Jim Sniechowski - The New Intimacy - www.menstuff.org/columns/newintimacy/archive.html
  • Reena Sommer - Custody - is an internationally recognized relationship and divorce consultant. www.menstuff.org/columns/sommer/archive.html
  • R. Don Steele - Don Steele - relationship questions answered -
    www.menstuff.org/columns/steele/archive.html
  • David Steinberg - Comes Naturally - on sexuality - www.menstuff.org/columns/steinberg/archive.html
  • Mary Lou St Lucas - A Mother's Love - www.menstuf.org/columns/stlucas/archive.html
  • Surprise - Surprise Author - From a new columnist every month - www.menstuff.org/columns/surprise/archive.html
  • Steven Svoboda - Fatherhood, Activism and the Law www.menstuff.org/columns/svoboda/archive.html
  • Michael Taylor - A New Conversation with Men - www.menstuff.org/columns/taylor/archive.html
  • Bruce Van Horn - Yoga for Men - issues around the health benefits of yoga for men - www.menstuff.org/yoga/archive.html
  • Michael Webb - Secrets of Blissful Relationships - on relationship - www.menstuff.org/columns/bliss/archive.html
  • Stuart Wilde - Spirituality - www.menstuff.org/columns/wilde/archive.html
  • Dr.Williams - Sex Health - on sexual health - Dr. Williams, www.menstuff.org/columns/sexhealth/archive.html
  • KC Wilson - On Gender Politics is a social commentator and author. www.menstuff.org/columns/wilson/archive.html

Plus

  • Health Tips - on general health - www.menstuff.org/columns/healthtips/archive.html
  • Independent Means - resources for raising financially fit kids - www.menstuff.org/columns/independentmeans/archive.html
  • Numbers - www.menstuff.org/columns/numbers/archive.html
  • Questions - www.menstuff.org/columns/q&a/archive.html
  • Surprise - from a new columnist every month - www.menstuff.org/columns/surprise/archive.html
  • Words Can Heal - helping children grow up healthy - www.menstuff.org/columns/wordscanheal/archive.html
  • Wuzup?! - National or international events happening this month - www.menstuff.org/columns/whassup/archive.html

AWARENESS EVENTS THIS MONTH

July is Freedom Month. If you enjoy the benefits this country has to offer, you might check out what kind of men it took to found this country. The Fourth of July has more to it than beer, picnics, and baseball games. Read this! July is Anti-Boredom; National Mobility; Purposeful Parenting: Recreation and Parks; The month of the Muslim new year; Hemochromatosis Screening Awareness; National Foreign Language Month.

June 27 - July 4: Special Recreation Week. June 25-July 1: Deaf-Blindness Awareness Week. June 27 - July 4: Special Recreation Week. Jul 1-8 Music for Life; July 3-Aug 15: Air Conditioning Appreciation Days. Jul 4-10 - Freedom Week. July 8:-14: National Laundry Workers; National Therapeutic Recreation: Take Charge of Change Week. Jul 9-15 - Nude Recreation. July 15-21: *Captive Nations; Legal Revolution; National Plan to Promote Your Business Week. Jul 1 UN Day of Cooperation; International Joke; National Financial Freedom; National Recreation and Parks; National Purposeful Parenting, Jul 2 - I Forgot; Ducktona 500 Day; July 3: Compliment Your Mirror: Stay Out of the Sun Day. Jul 4 - Independence Day (U.S.); American Redneck; Fear from Fear of Speaking ; Independence-from-Meat Day; Sidewalk Egg Frying; Jul 5 - National Family Day, July 7: Father-Daughter Take a Walk Together; International UN Day of Cooperation. July 9: Don't Step on a Bee Day. July 10: Intern Appreciation Day. July 13: Skeptics' Day. July 14: Cow Apprecaition Day. July 15: National Ice Cream; Saint Swithin's Day. July 16: International Town Criers; Naitonal Get Out of the Doghouse Day. July 17: Wrong Way Corrigan Day. Jul 20 - Ugly Truck; Riot Act anniversary. July 21: Rat-Catchers Day. Jul 22 - Ice Cream Cone Day. July 23: Hot Enough For Ya Day. July 24: Cousins; Health and Happiness with Hypnosis Day. Jul 27 - *National Korean War Veterans Armistice; Take Your Houseplants for a Walk Day. July 29: *Parents' Day. Jul 30 - Father-In-Law Day, National Parent's Day.

* Means a Presidential Proclamation has been made.

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Men are so competitive that we even "out-die" women in all 15 of the major causes of death in the U.S. Most of these deaths are preventable with a positive change in life-style, eating habits, and/or general health care. Let's not strive so hard to hold on to this record. See what you can change now to live a healthier life.
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